


When No One's Watching

by Gummiebear



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bottom Liam, Football Player Liam, Football Player Niall, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-22
Updated: 2016-02-22
Packaged: 2018-05-22 16:42:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 54,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6087067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gummiebear/pseuds/Gummiebear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam always thought that joining the Arsenal Football Club would be the most difficult thing he'd do in his life. Well, he was wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When No One's Watching

**Author's Note:**

> This is my baby, stirring in my womb since July. This is by far the longest thing I've ever written in the history of me writing fan fiction. This is also the first time I've ever written smut so please be gentle with me, or not. I just hope you all enjoy this craziness. And yes, I'm also aware that lyrics from I Won't Mind have been used over and over again as fic titles since the song was released. I am uncreative, obviously. Also, I know nothing about English Football, I'm just a terrible, horrible, obnoxious fan. 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
>  [tumblr](http://softestziam.tumblr.com/)

"Reading about yourself again, Payno?"

Liam rolled his eyes as he stared up at Niall, over his paper, who was bouncing on his heels in front of him. "It's just the Telegraph."

"Just the Telegraph," Niall mocked with a laugh. "That's just the printed press, your face is all over Sky Sports, bro."

"It's kind of surreal, isn't it?" Liam asked, his face full of astonishment, folding the paper and placing it next to him on the bench. "Marcus gets injured and I get called up. Me!"

"You've been a part of this team before me," Niall reminded him, still bouncing. "It's about fucking time."

"You know Sky Sports called me the next Beckham," Liam scoffed. "No way."

"George saw something in you," he reminded him proudly. "You deserve all the praise. Just don't steal my shine and we'll be good."

"Don't worry," Liam assured him. "I'm fine with just being able to play full time."

"Then let's go!" Niall exclaimed. "Lace up your boots and get out on the pitch. Time for your first practice in the big times, Payno."

Liam laughed at Niall's enthusiast nature, it was contagious. For the last six years he'd only dreamt about this moment, playing for Arsenal football club. He joined the team at fifteen and went through the ranks, never ever playing a minute of the game. He was never ready the scouts always said, had all the potential in the world but not the drive. The last year changed all that though. He kept seeing all his friends around him get called up and get their chance at the big time. Niall was called up eighteen months ago when their goalie retired and their backup tore his Achilles' tendon. It was just dumb luck for him, a few freak incidences lead him to his grand moment. The London crowd ended up adorning Niall, claiming the Irishmen as one of their own overnight. His first game against Manchester United was still talked about in all the pubs, he became a legend overnight. Liam wanted that, not the notoriety but the euphoric feeling Niall still carried around with him as a badge of honor. 

Now was his chance to shine, his chance to be someone. Arsenals legendary midfielder, Marcus Riley ended up getting into a car accident a few weeks before training began and within a blink of an eye Liam was getting a phone call from his agent, Arsenal wanted to sign him. All his hard work and dedication was finally paying off. His contract was only for half a season, until Marcus was healed and ready to get back on the pitch. He didn't care though, a half a season was better than nothing at all. Walking through the doors at Emirates Stadium was surreal, he only dreamed of a place like this when he was a kid living in Wolverhampton. No one from where he was from became somebody, you usually went off to university and ended up still living in the same small town. Now Liam had a chance to make a name for himself and for his town. 

"Look alive Payne," George, his coach called to him. "You're no longer in Kansas, Dorothy."

From his spot at the goal post, Niall let out a laugh, doubling over. 

"That goes for you too Toto," George added causing the rest of the team to laugh. He blew his whistle to get everyone back in order. "Today is a new day, the start of a new season. We ended up losing the league by two points last year. I don't want a repeat of that, Chelsea is good but we're better."

The first practice was a blur, everything around Liam feeling a bit fuzzy. He was physically able to keep up but his mind was somewhere else. Trying to remember plays he always heard being spoken about. He was told to show passion and heart and that was just what he was going to show. Diving to get the ball, not being afraid to go for a header, no matter how much it would hurt later on. This was what he craved, the adrenaline pumping through his veins for a full ninety minutes. Football was what Liam ate, slept, and breathed his whole entire life. The youngest of three and the only boy, it was the one thing that bonded him and his father. The moment he could walk he got a football as a birthday and Christmas gift, it was drilled into his head at an early age. Liam knew that school wasn't something he could excel in, he passed and was smart enough to do more with his life but nothing fueled him as much as football did. It wasn't just a hobby like other boys on the playground back in primary school. He had even practiced signing his autograph as soon as he knew how to spell his name. It was imbedded in him. It was a part of his DNA. 

The shower at the end of the long practice was just what Liam needed. The hot spray hitting his face and soothing his soon to be aching muscles. Even though he received tons of praise from his coach and other players that afternoon he still felt like it wasn't enough, that he wasn't enough. The first official match of the season wasn't for another three weeks but Liam felt as if he wouldn't be ready on time. The past six years clearly weren't enough preparation for the big times. Watching on the sidelines and hoping and praying for this moment wasn't enough. He could have all the confidence in the world about his football skills but if he didn't produce well enough, it was on to the next guy who could, and for cheaper. Right now all Liam truly needed to concentrate on was relaxing and enjoying the ride. 

"Hurry up getting dressed," Niall called to him as they both stood in front of their lockers, towels wrapped around their waists. "We're going out."

"Ni, I'm beat," Liam groaned, searching for his deodorant inside his locker. "I just want to go home and pass out."

"Sorry," he apologized with a shake of his head. "No can do, Payno. It's tradition, the second years take out the newbies for a night out on the town. Oil and Harv did it for me last year."

"I'm the only newbie," Liam laughed. "Wouldn't it be odd for just the two of us to be going out?"

"I'm making it a lads night," Niall explained. "Invited a couple of friends along. It's about time you got a proper night out in London."

"Fine," Liam begrudgingly gave in with a sigh, shutting his locker closed with a loud bang. "Meet you out front in ten."

"Ace," Niall let out a cheer in excitement, quickly getting changed, arms and legs flailing all over. 

*****

Liam was beat by the time Niall dragged him to the first pub, a small place a few minutes away from the stadium. He swore the crowd was always small and no one ever bothered him, even when they did recognize him. The pints were always flowing and just cold enough. Liam didn't care, he just needed to sit down, his legs were sore and started to feel like jelly. If he felt like this after only one practice he didn't want to know how he'd be feeling after a game. He couldn't concentrate on that now, Niall was pushing him into a dimly lit booth where two other people were already sitting down. Liam guessed it was time to socialize. 

"Payno, this is my flatmate Harry," Niall began the introductions, pointing to the curly haired boy who was sitting directly across from him. "Haz here is gonna be working for the team this year."

"I'm interning with Dr. Stewart," Harry finished, reaching over to shake Liam's hand. "Real life experience plus earning credits for uni at the same time."

"Glad to know I'm not the only newbie this year then," Liam laughed, turning his attention to the guy sitting comfortably next to Harry. He looked familiar, the signature hair in his deep blue eyes. Liam had seen his face before. 

"And that's Louis," Niall told him dryly, rolling his eyes as he spoke. 

"Thanks for the stellar introduction Ni," Louis replied with his own eye roll, shaking Liam's hand. "And that's why I don't represent you, you're a real knob."

"It's not because you're too busy with Zayn to have other clients?" Niall asked, raising his eyebrows with a laugh. 

"Wanker," Louis teased him. "Haz, be a dear and get the first round with Nialler."

Harry grabbed the money Louis passed him and pulled Niall up by his collar as they made their way to the bar. After a few minutes of protesting Liam agreed to let Niall get his first round. He had to be reminded that Niall was the one who invited him out, as a way of welcoming him to the club. Both boys left at the table sat in silence, Liam still looking curiously at Louis. He still looked so familiar, he knew he had seen him before. Maybe they played together back when they were teens. That wasn't it though, a majority of the people Liam played with were already playing in the big leagues. Maybe Louis was an actor that he'd seen on TV while flipping channels late at night, not able to sleep. No. That wasn't it. Who was this guy? 

"Tommo, El is here," Niall knocked Liam out of his thoughts when he slid next to him. "She told me not to tell you she's here."

"She's got an audition tomorrow morning!" Louis exclaimed, exasperated. "Michael Bay flew over here just to see her. She better just be drinking water, the little troublemaker."

"You're Louis Tomlinson," Liam finally realized. The three people that sat around him all just started at him, watching that light bulb go off above his head, figuratively speaking. 

"Have been for twenty three years now mate," Louis laughed, his mouth around his pint, about to take a sip. 

"No, but you're like a big shot agent and shit," Liam marveled. "Represent Eleanor Calder and Zayn Malik."

"Another Zayn obsessed fan," Harry snorted. "Can't get within five feet of Lou without finding one."

"Zayn's my best mate," Louis told Liam, who looked like he was hanging on every word he said. "The kid's talented and when he left his old team I was more than willing to scoop him up."

"His latest song, No Type, is my absolute favorite," Liam gushed. "All his new stuff is ace, not like his older stuff wasn't immaculate."

"Immaculate?" Niall mouthed to Harry, with a smirk, who started laughing, covering his mouth so Liam wouldn't notice. "Okay, maybe crazy fan is more appropriate."

"What?" Liam asked, shaking his head. "N-no, just appreciate a good artist when I see one. Wait. Did you say Eleanor was here now? Like at this exact same pub as us?"

"Yea," Louis rolled his eyes. "Wanna meet her? I can probably arrange that, only if you convince her to go home. Not with you of course, unless you're into that. But it'll have to be tomorrow after she nails her audition."

"S-sure," Liam answered timidly. Eleanor was a pretty girl, a typical movie star, the girl next door as the media portrayed her. It was true though, she had this relatable quality that drew everyone in. Not Liam though, yes he found her likeable and attractive but he just wasn't that attracted to her. See, Liam was gay, something that he had to keep to himself. All his friends and family back home knew but once he moved to London at fifteen he vowed to remain silent about it. No one needed a openly gay football player, it was unheard of. 

"When I'm good and smashed I'll introduce you," Louis assured him. "I can't deal with her nonsense excuses sober." 

Around midnight Liam was finally introduced to Eleanor. She was delightful and polite despite a rather drunk Louis trying to reprimand her for being out so late, like she was a child. It was all in good fun when they both started laughing after Eleanor compromised with Louis, promising to leave after she finished her drink, her second glass of wine that night. Overall Liam enjoyed his night out. It helped get his mind off of everything that was bothering him, maybe Niall was a genius after all. He had good company, Harry was a blast. He was filled with endless and endless stories, none of them really making any sense but Harry seemed to enjoy telling them so Liam listened with bated breath. Louis was a thrill to just observe, he never stayed still. When he was sitting he just had to touch something, a napkin he pulled apart piece by piece or the back of Harry's neck. That was one relationship Liam wanted to know the answers to but knew it wasn't his place to ask the questions, yet. They just bounced off each other effortlessly. Niall was a great guy to just be around, his energy was contagious. You could never frown when you were around him, he always had a witty comment to say that made everyone laugh. 

Despite his clouded mind, Liam made it home at a decent hour, if you call three in the morning a decent hour. He couldn't even recall how he made it back to his flat but he was more than thrilled to be in his bed. Maybe when he woke up Liam would be able to recall the rest of his night. Last thing he remembered was saying goodbye to Eleanor when she left around one and then taking shots with Niall. Whatever he did it worked, his head hit the pillow and he was fast asleep. The long day he had finally catching up with his body and mind. All Liam knew was that he had to do it all over again the next day. Another grueling day of practice, another day to prove that he deserved his spot on the team. When his alarm went off, he didn't even remember setting it last night, four hours later he just wanted to stay in bed and forget that practice even existed. He knew he had to get up though, had to start another day. 

"How are you alive?" Niall asked him once he got to the stadium, his voice hoarse from the night before. His blue eyes were covered by dark sunglasses, a clear indication that his eyes were probably bloodshot. 

"How did I get home?" Liam asked with a laugh. "Did I walk? Is my car still parked by the pub?"

"You were smashed, bro," Niall laughed and closed his locker quietly as possible. "Lou took care of your car, it should be by your flat by the time you get home."

"Louis is a good guy, Harry too," Liam told him, pulling his jersey over his head. "What's their deal anyway?"

"It's complicated," he groaned. "They've been playing this back and forth game for over a year now. I don't try to understand it."

"Gotcha," Liam laughed and shook his head. "Come one Ni, don't want to be late for our second day."

"Too fucking perky this early in the bloody morning," Niall muttered as he dragged his feet behind Liam. 

*****

"You made your audition on time, right?" Louis asked Eleanor as he spoke to her on the phone. He was sitting behind his mahogany desk that was littered with papers and a laptop he rarely turned on. 

"Yes Lou, I got there on time," Eleanor groaned, he could just feel her rolling her eyes as she answered. "Michael wasn't even there yet when I arrived."

"Did you crush it?" He asked, throwing a few pieces of paper on the floor so he could rest his legs comfortably on the desk. "You know El, this is a huge deal."

"I crushed it," she confirmed confidently. "Now can I go back to sleep? I have a wicked hangover."

"That's what you get for staying out so late drinking," he reprimanded her, a teasing tone to his voice. "Go, sleep. I'll call you if I hear anything."

Louis and Eleanor hung up after exchanging quick goodbyes. He looked out at his huge office and just laughed. This was his life. At twenty three he never expected to be in the position he was currently in. As a kid his life's dream was to either be a massive football star or an English teacher, how did he end up being an agent. It was all Zayn's fault. He watched his best friend audition for the X Factor at seventeen and come in third place. A month later he was snatched up by a record label and flown all across Europe and eventually the United States. That's where Louis caught the bug, watching all the behind the scenes stuff intrigued him. When Zayn left his old management Louis was just starting out but Zayn trusted him and immediately signed with his agency. He had to scoff at that word, Louis was hardly an agent. He only had two clients but they both happened to be huge superstars. 

Zayn was the face of young R&B music, the British Chris Brown he was dubbed when he was first coming up, minus the dancing. Louis spotted Zayn's Grammy sitting nice and neat on his shelf, all of Zayn's trophies ended up on his mantel. He always said all his accomplishments wouldn't be the same without Louis in his life. Childhood friends that stuck together and made a name for themselves in this crazy business. His other client, Eleanor, was an ex girlfriend from his teen years, early teen years. Getting her to the position she was in now was a struggle but neither of them ever took that for granted. Appearing in movies and tv shows no one remembered made her who Eleanor was today. Her BAFTA award was sitting pretty right next to Zayn's Grammy. In the three short years in this business, Louis was a lucky man. 

"Bro!" Louis exclaimed when he spotted Zayn walking into his office. "How's my favorite client?"

"You say that to El too," Zayn told him, a smirk on his lips. "I've heard you say that to El actually."

"She took my virginity, I need to be nice to her," Louis shrugged his shoulders. "You though are my ultimate client."

Zayn rolled his eyes as he sat in front of the desk, lacing his hands behind his head before placing his feet on the desk, copying Louis. "You wanted a meeting, what's up?"

Louis took his feet off the desk and pushed his chair closer so he could rest his elbows on the spacious mahogany. "You ever heard of a lad called Liam Payne?"

"Did I sleep with him?" Zayn asked, wracking his brain trying to put a face to the name. He had to put his tongue between his teeth to stifle a laugh at Louis horrified face. "Kidding bro, no I've never heard of Liam Payne. Why?"

"He's the newest midfielder for Arsenal, met him last night. Cool dude, a little obsessive over you and El," Louis explained. "Called you immaculate."

"I think I need to hire this guy for PR," Zayn joked. "Spent the night out with Hazza I assume. How is the love of your life doing anyway?"

"Bro!" Louis exclaimed, a blush quickly creeping up on his cheeks. "What did I say about using that word about him?"

"That it's true," Zayn was quick to reply. He never understood why his best friend was so afraid to admit his feelings for Harry. They'd been doing this dance around how they felt for each other for what seemed like years. It exhausted Zayn and it wasn't even his own life. "You won't lose any cool points if you admit it Lou."

"You're exhausting," he sighed, running his hand through his perfectly crafted unkempt hair. It was his trademark, bedhead that took him all morning to perfect. 

"So you called me at six this morning just to tell me that you spent the night with Liam Payne?" Zayn asked, scratching at the scruff on his cheeks. He was supposed to be enjoying a week long holiday before he was due back in the studio. "A text would've easily sufficed."

Louis shook his head as he leaned in closer to Zayn, checked behind him to make sure no one was loitering around the open door like they usually did when he was in the office. "Would I be crazy to add a footballer to my line of clients?"

"Finally adding Niall?" Zayn laughed, it was an ongoing joke between the group of friends. Niall was more than happy with his representation, had been for years, but loved to tease Louis about it. 

"Liam."

"Li-Liam," he spat out. "You don't even know this kid! I'd also assume he's well represented right now."

"This kid is represented by crooks," Louis explained. "I was buzzing last night bro, so I researched his deal, he's getting cheated. His agents only got him a half a season deal. A half a season!"

"That's better than nothing, right?" Zayn asked sheepishly. He scoffed once Louis so eloquently rolled his eyes at the question. "I know nothing about football and all this agent crap, that's why I have you."

"Worst client ever," Louis groaned. "I take back everything I said, El is now my favorite."

"Remember that next time she misses an audition," he laughed. "So you called me in here just so I could listen to you babble on and on about a lad I don't even know."

"No! I need your help," he told him, a wide cheeky grin on his face. "If I have any chance of Liam signing with me, I'm gonna need all hands on deck, that includes you buddy."

"Can I at least enjoy my week off first?" Zayn asked, moving his feet off the desk before Louis had the chance to knock them off when he moved forward. "Fine. I'll help, just tell me what I need to do and I'll be more than willing to help."

"Good boy," Louis teased. 

*****

Liam was enjoying the only quiet time he got nowadays by lying in his bed doing absolutely nothing. He just got out of a nice warm bath to sooth his aching muscles, a week of practices were over and now he had the next two days to recover. The next two days to reconsider joining the team. He wasn't going to quit, that was not an option. Maybe, just maybe, Liam was finally realizing how in over his head he actually was with all of this. Playing for the junior leagues for six years maybe was just enough for him, the big times was something else entirely. He didn't want to seem ungrateful, like everything that was happening to him wasn't a big deal, but it was overwhelming. He watched so many of his former teammates make it and just get chewed up and spat out by the process of it all. And then there was the press aspect of it all which just seemed daunting. Even from a fan standpoint it just seemed exhausting. 

The press was a beast in itself, it was something Liam never expected to make such a impact on his career already. He'd done interviews and gave sound bites within the last six years, always talking about the team or teammates who had finally made it. His name had become synonymous with being a background player, someone who didn't matter. Now things had changed substantially. Even though it was just practice, photographers lined the games at the stadium, all of them clambering to get a decent picture of him. He would drive into practice and just hear them screaming his name, desperately trying to get his attention. The written press wasn't any different, articles already written about all his potential. People calling him the new David Beckham, a comparison he wasn't ready to accept. 

Liam saw people like Niall just revel in it all though and that gave him a glimpse of hope. Maybe it wouldn't all be that bad. Maybe he'd get use to all the attention by the time the season came around, when the buzz eventually had to die down. The media was fickle, got over a story rather quickly nowadays. Liam hoped it wouldn't interfere with his playing, he already had all eyes on him he didn't need a total mess up to draw unwanted attention to him. If he was being honest with himself, all this pressure was a little intense. He was still a twenty one year old kid who grew up in a small town that only dreamt of this. His younger self would've never picture the life he led now and how it all changed seemingly overnight. There wasn't a guide he could go by, he just had to wing it and hope for the best. 

Liam groaned in frustration as he heard his phone begin to ring. He could've sworn he put it on vibrate so it wouldn't interfere with his relaxation time. Sighing in defeat he stretched to reach it as it laid on his nightstand. Looking at the ID quickly he didn't recognize the number. He wracked his brain hemming and hawing over whether to answer it. It could be a journalist wanting an interview or it could be someone harmless, having the wrong number. "Hello?"

"Liam Payne, my man!"

"Umm who's this?" Liam asked, not recognizing the voice on the other end, it was a males voice that's all he could get. 

"Oh sorry mate, it's Louis Tomlinson," he answered with a laugh. 

If Liam wasn't so relaxed he would've dropped his phone in shock. Louis Tomlinson had his number! Louis Tomlinson was calling him on a Saturday afternoon to talk to him! "H-hey. What's up?"

"I was wondering if you could stop by my place today, I'd like to pick your brain about things," he vaguely explained. Louis bit into his knuckles to stop himself from scoffing at his own words. He was acting like an immature child who was afraid to ask the cute boy to the dance. "Totally casual, by the way."

"Y-yea sure," Liam answered a little unsure. Why was Louis calling him and then asking him to come by his place. Did he know? Did he know he was gay? Was he making a pass at him, Liam had just seen him a few days ago all over Harry. 

"I have some football questions I want to ask," he elaborated. That seemed smooth enough, right?

"You couldn't ask Niall?" Liam asked with a laugh. 

Louis stifled his groan by nervously laughing, damn Liam and his intelligence. "He's a goalie though, he doesn't know much about actually playing."

"That's harsh," he told him. "Sure though. Just let me get your address and I'll be over as soon as I can."

A half hour later Liam was driving into Louis personal garage. Even from the outside everything looked so glamorous. Liam knew the moment he drove onto Louis's street that he was in a posh part of London, a place reserved for the wealthy and successful. A neighborhood he one day wished to live in, instead of his rundown flat where he was lucky to get hot water once a week. It was all he could afford at the time anyway. Once he parked his car and got out he had to take a secret lift up to the penthouse suite. That just baffled Liam completely. He didn't know much about Louis, just that he was almost as young as he was and clearly very successful at his job. The lift was small and lined with mirrors which Liam hated. He had to ride in silence and was forced to stare at his reflection the whole entire time. He cursed himself, clearly not realizing how unprofessional he looked. It wasn't a business meeting but he could've looked a little better, baggy jogging bottoms and a loose fitting shirt no longer seemed like proper attire. 

With immense trepidation Liam got off the lift and walked the short distance to Louis's front door. His palms were getting sweaty and he felt his heart start to beat a little faster in his chest. Why was he so nervous? Louis seemed like a cool guy when they met and he was chill during their quick phone call. Liam had to remind himself to breathe, take deep breaths. He raised his hand to knock and just began to wait. He thought he heard Louis's voice on the other side of the door telling him to hold on. The waiting was the worst, made Liam even more nervous if that was possible. What happened to the confident Liam that he had grown into recently? The one who wasn't afraid of anything, he looked and felt fearless on the pitch, a place where he should've been the most nervous in his entire life. Now a small hang out with a internationally known manager was making him all panicky. 

"Liam Payne!" Louis greeted him once he threw the front door open, a wide grin on his face. His hair was once again styled in his signature disheveled look. Liam breathed a sigh of relief when he noticed that Louis was dressed similar to him, jogging bottoms and a Black Sabbath band shirt on. 

Liam followed Louis into his home and whistled at the extravagance of it all. It looked like a typical bachelor pad, the foyer was a complete mess. He walked in a little further and the living room coffee table was littered with takeout containers and what looked like today's newspapers were scattered around. Other than that, what Liam could see was immaculate. The real hardwood floors, the clean, white leather furniture. If it was clean the place would barely look lived in. 

"Want something to drink?" Louis's question knocked Liam out of his daze, admiring everything around him. 

"Water," he answered with an uncertain shrug of his shoulders. He was still in awe of everything. 

Louis scurried off into another room while Liam still investigated everything around him. On the opposite side of the sofa was a fireplace, the large flat screen tv hanging above it. Lined on top of the fireplace were pictures, Liam hesitantly walked towards the picture frames to get a closer look. The first couple of people he didn't recognize, assuming they were family members. The ones he did recognize put a smile on his face, his favorite was an obvious older picture of Louis and Zayn from when they were kids. Louis had a protective arm around Zayn's neck, huge grins on both their faces. The picture next to it was a picture of Louis and Eleanor that looked more recent, Louis dressed in a suit and Eleanor was wearing a deep purple gown, holding her BAFTA. The last one was of Louis, Zayn, Harry, and Niall standing on a football field that looked like Emirates Stadium. 

"That was after the last game of last year's season."

Liam jumped at Louis voice. He took the water that was offered to him with an embarrassed look on his face. "You've known Niall long?"

"A year," Louis answered and ushered Liam to the sofa to sit. "He was already playing full time when he became Harry's roommate. Fits in well with our band of misfits."

"How you meet Harry?" Liam asked, now overly curious to hear endless amounts of stories of these friends. 

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down Payne," he laughed. "I invited you here to pick your brain, not the opposite."

"Sorry," Liam apologized sheepishly and cautiously sat down on the sofa, the leather making a noise as he sat. "It's just that you guys seem like amazing mates even though none of you really seem to fit."

"We don't," Louis agreed, laughing and taking a seat next to Liam. "Zayn's stuck with me though, best friends for life and whatnot. And I kind of run his career."

"That must be odd," he noticed. "Managing your best mates career, doesn't it get hard sometimes? Like what if you two have a tiff, does it ever effect your working relationship?"

Louis sat back and thought about Liam's question. Honestly he and Zayn hadn't had a real fight since they began working together. Yes, there had been typical banter but it was never anything major. "We just got lucky. I don't look at him as a paycheck, Eleanor either. I always have their best interests at heart. They succeed, I succeed."

"That's good," Liam said with a nod, his eyes still wondering over the room. It was so spacious, there must've been at least three bedrooms in this place, maybe two bathrooms. "I don't really have that relationship with my agents, I've been with them since I was sixteen, still a kid."

The rest of the afternoon went fairly fast, both boys chatting like they've known each other for years instead of less than a week. Louis tried to subtly bring up Liam's agents more than once, see how he truly felt about them. From the way he spoke about them so freely it felt to Louis that Liam just stayed with his agents out of comfort. That was exactly what Louis wanted to hear, wanted to know that Liam was unhappy with the way he was being managed. He knew that straight out asking Liam to sign with him wasn't how it was going to work, there were tons of background things that needed to be done. It gave him hope though, hope that it wouldn't take long to convince Liam to jump onboard with him, Zayn, and Eleanor. 

Liam was good guy, he seemed to fit in easily with Louis and his all over the place antics. He could never sit still, Louis always had to be moving or talking at all times. He was always quick with a joke or a witty antidote to share. It put Liam and his over worked nerves to ease. It never felt like a meeting or two people getting to know each other, it felt like two old friends catching each other up on their lives. In some of the quiet moments Liam even contemplated telling Louis that he was gay, he felt that close to him. He didn't though, there were some things he realized he needed to keep private. On his drive home Liam felt content, felt at peace for the first time all week. His life was turned upside down the moment he got the phone call about joining the team full time, now it didn't seem like a huge obstacle in his way. It felt more like something he was born to do, something he was ready to conquer. Louis made him feel that way, especially when he kept going on and on about how excited he was to see Liam play. 

Louis even told Liam that he wasn't a huge Arsenal fan, he usually rooted for Manchester United. But now that he knew two players he was willing to put his feelings aside and cheer them on during their season. That statement alone made Liam feel like a champion, feel important. Someone he hardly even knew was willing to support him, even when he would inevitably screw up. His own agents didn't swear that much allegiance to him. They were just in it for the quick buck and maybe some notoriety. Louis though, he seemed like a friend first and an agent second. He made it all sound so easy and care free. If Liam wasn't already tied down to an agency he would've clearly begged Louis to sign him. It wasn't that black and white though, there was a lot of things that went on behind the scenes that Liam wasn't even clear of. 

*****

"Louis is a cool bro, and his house, whoa," Liam spoke to Niall as they got changed in the locker room early Monday morning. 

"I know," Niall agreed with a laugh. "Haz keeps telling me that he has a Jacuzzi in his master bathroom."

"Oh god," Liam groaned at the thought. "That sounds heavenly."

"Lifestyles of the rich and famous," Niall joked and shut his locker with a loud bang. 

"You talking about Louis Tomlinson?" Carlos Torres, one of the teams forwards asked. 

"You know him?" Niall asked, a little stunned. 

"Heard about him," Carlos answered. "He manages Zayn Malik and Eleanor Calder, right? Two of the most famous people to come out of England nowadays."

"Listen up ladies," George's booming voice rang through the crowded locker room. "I have an announcement to make. Just got off the phone with the front office and it looks like we're taking a trip abroad in a few weeks."

Liam looked over at Niall, his eyes wide with excitement. Going abroad? This announcement seemed like a once in a lifetime opportunity and he didn't even hear where he was going yet.

"Where we going George?" Niall asked, buzzing with excitement along with the rest of the team. He grabbed onto Liam's shoulder, tight, his fingers leaving tiny white marks in its wake. 

"Singapore," George announced. "We're playing their national team as part of our pre season games."

The reality of the news sat heavy in the room. Everyone was excited, some players letting out hollers and shouts while others jumped around like children. 

"Singapore?" Liam repeated, his voice cracking as he spoke. "I've never left the UK before."

"All of you need to check your passports, see if they're up to date because we leave on the thirteenth of July and the game is on the sixteenth," George continued to explain over the ruckus. 

It was only their sixth practice but Liam and even the rest of the team knew it was their best one so far. They were all running high on adrenaline and the news of their game in Singapore. Liam was more focused then he ever felt before, he was going to be starting in a game, representing not only his team but the league. Chelsea had a game scheduled in New York to play the Red Bulls, it was a thing the league was known to do during the preseason. But to play in Singapore, against their national team was just astonishing. He rushed home after practice and phoned his parents. After spending ten minutes calming his mother down, she was always worried about him. He was her baby after all, she had every right to worry. He spent a half hour talking his father's ear off about everything that was happening to him, all the excitement in his life. 

It was close to nine when he finally got off the phone and decided to research all about Singapore and what he could potentially do. He knew that they were going to have a full day to be tourists and Liam wanted to be well prepared. He found interesting restaurants and touristy sites and immediately emailed Niall, excited about all the possibilities. It was the first time since he joined the team that Liam felt like he belonged, that everything just clicked. He hadn't even played an official game yet but he was ready, ready for whatever the future held for him. If it all ended up going away when Marcus was healthy again Liam wanted to be able to look back at his experience and be proud of himself. Be proud of the game he played and how he conducted himself, despite all the pressure that was put on him. Niall replied to his email with a text message, a simple thumbs up emoji to show his excitement. That was all Liam needed to know that he had a partner in all his Singapore adventures. 

*****

Louis tried to busy himself at home, do something to occupy his mind. He still didn't understand why he decided to rent out a penthouse. A nice simple flat in the heart of London would've easily sufficed. But no, nothing was ever simple about Louis Tomlinson. It was either go big or go home for him. That motto materialized in all aspects of his life, starting when he was a child. He was older than most of the kids he lived around and made sure they all knew that too. He was the boss and made everyone listen to him, that was until he met Zayn. He was the only one who stood up to him and said no, and that's how their beautiful friendship began. Louis immediately had a partner in crime, someone who automatically had his back, no questions asked. It ended up being the most important relationship in his life. Boyfriends and girlfriends came and went but Zayn never left his side. He went off to become a huge successful star and never once thought about leaving Louis behind. 

Louis had heard countless stories about people making it big and then dropping everyone they once knew. It frightened him if he was being honest. The thought of losing Zayn, it was real. A little too real maybe. Most of his other friends were off to university, leaving their small town behind and never once looking back. He had opted out of higher education, stating that the real world would be his school from now on. When Zayn invited him on tour while he was touring in the United States it clicked for Louis, this was the life he needed to lead. Lost now was all the other dreams he ever had of playing football or teaching, this is where he belonged. That entire tour and the one in Europe that followed, Louis was more than attentive to every little detail that occurred behind the scenes. That's where he really learned how to build his own business. He didn't need school or books to teach him, the real world was more than enough. 

"You know the TV only works if you turn it on."

Louis jumped up at the voice knocking him out of his thoughts. One of these days he was going to remember to lock his front door. "H-Harry what the hell! You nearly gave me a heart attack."

"I rang the bell twice," he replied and took a seat next to Louis on the couch. "Figured the door was unlocked so I let myself in."

"Of course," Louis said with an exaggerated eye roll. Maybe his mum was right, if he kept doing that his eyes would permanently get stuck behind his head. "Why did you decide to sneak attack me?"

"I can't just see you because I like seeing you?" Harry asked, batting his eyes and giving his best wounded puppy dog look. 

Louis had to sigh to stop himself from jumping Harry. He always knew exactly what to do to distract him from the real conversation. He would've thought he'd be over it by now, be use to it. Obviously not. "There's always an ulterior motive with you. What gives?"

"I'm going to Singapore!" He exclaimed excitingly. His monotone voice never held so much excitement, no one really knew when he was being serious. 

"Can you afford that?" He asked. Harry was a third year uni student and Louis reckoned that a flight to Asia probably cost a pretty penny. He didn't even know if he could afford a flight to Singapore. "I mean, you just started your internship. They're paying you that much."

"It's with the team," Harry answered with a scoff. "Got the news during practice today. I didn't know I was going to go but Dr. Stewart asked me to come along."

"T-that's great," he congratulated him. He was elated for Harry, knew he always wanted to explore parts of the world he could only dream about. If Louis was being honest with himself it kind of stung to know that Harry would be away for a while. "How long you going for?"

"Five or six days," he answered with a shrug as he stretched to reach the remote on the coffee table in front of him. The silence in the room was getting to be too much. Time to drown out the awkwardness with mindless television. "We're only in the country technically for two days but it takes about a day to fly there."

Louis looked over at Harry who was grinning wildly. That was the Harry he loved the most, shit. No, no he didn't love him. Stupid Zayn and his stupid observations. Correction, this was the Harry that he ended up being only sexual attracted to. Yes, yes that's all he was to Louis, a sexual partner. That's all they were. 

"We leave on the thirteenth," Harry continued, flipping aimlessly through the hundreds of channels Louis TV offered. "We head back straight after the game on the sixteenth. Lou, I'm going to bloody Singapore!"

"I heard," he laughed and tried his hardest to focus on whatever cooking show Harry ended up being enamored by. "Wait. You leave the thirteenth? El's epic birthday party is the day before."

"Don't worry. Ni and I figured we'd go to the party and not sleep before heading to catch our flight," Harry explained. "We'll sleep on the plane to Dubai. That too, we have a layover in Dubai for four hours. Dubai!"

"Two more stamps on your passport, another step closer to being a world traveler," Louis joked and felt his chest tighten when Harry smiled over at him. Shit. He was in love with Harry Styles. He saw Harry move his mouth as he continued speaking but all his could focus on was what he was feeling. This was all Zayn's fault, he put the thought into his head and now he couldn't stop thinking about it. 

"Lou, you listening?" He asked and scoffed when Louis's blank face gave him his answer. "I swear sometimes I feel like you're light years away in that pretty head of yours."

"Huh?" Louis finally spoke. "Sorry Haz, just thinking about work and El's party."

"That's more important than me?" Harry huffed, hair in front of his face flying due to the puff of air escaping his lips. 

"No, sorry," he apologized with a shake of his head. "What were you talking about?"

"It's fine," Harry assured him with a small laugh. "I was just rambling on about Singapore anyway, nothing important."

"Oh okay," Louis nodded. "Just don't have too much fun when you're gone, okay? I'll be awfully lonely when you're gone."

Harry cooed at Louis's words and smiled wide at him. He moved closer to him, fitting his long body up against Louis smaller frame. It was instinctual for Louis to wrap his arms around Harry as he rested his head on his chest, his fingers immediately threading through his hair, playing with the loose curls. "I'll bring you back something nice, I promise."

"You better," Louis scoffed at the younger boy and kissed the top of his head as they continued to watch the cooking show in content silence. 

*****

"Payne, can I see you in my office?" George's voice called to Liam as the team began to wind down in the locker room after another grueling practice. 

The whole team began to whistle and snicker like children before George scolded them all. They made Liam even more nervous. He began to feel like all he'd ever feel would be a ball of nerves, his insides constantly vibrating. Why would his coach want to see him. As he pulled up his pants he cast a quick look at Niall who just shrugged his shoulders, confused as well. Great. This was just what Liam wanted. Everything he could ever think of began to run through his head. They'd been practicing for two straight weeks now and Liam assumed he was doing well enough. He wasn't told to pack up his things and leave, yet. He tied up his trainers tightly and gave out a sigh before walking into George's office. Some teammates like Carlos patted him on the back as he walked the few feet from his locker to the office. This was it, this was when Liam was going to get his walking papers. He guessed it was a lot of fun while it lasted, even if it only lasted a few weeks. 

"Take a seat," George instructed him and pointed to the oversized leather seat that was placed exactly across from where he sat. 

Liam hesitantly sat, casting one last look into the locker room where everyone pretended to look busy. "W-what's up?"

"Are you okay?" George asked straightforwardly, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the desk. 

"Yea," he answered, a little unsure. "A little sore from practice but I'm fine."

"Not psychically Payne, mentally, emotionally," he elaborated. "I see your name in the papers almost every day. That can take a toll on someone as fresh and new as you. Last time an Arsenal player received that much attention was when we signed Oli two years ago."

Liam sat back in the seat and let out a breath of relief. All that was worrying him washing away. "I-I'm good. No complaints thus far. It's all a little surreal if I'm being honest. The comparisons to Beckham and everything is a bit much."

"For a long time David was the face of English football," George agreed. "Now I guess it's your turn Payne, and that could make or break your game. Are you ready for all this pressure?"

"Yes," he answered skeptically. He scratched at that back of his neck, something Liam realized he did a lot when he was unsure of himself or nervous. Right now he was both. "I just don't want it to hinder my game in anyway."

"Neither do I," George agreed. "Listen Payne, the reason why I wanted you on this team full time was because I saw all the potential in the world in you. I know you won't let me down, you better not let me down." 

"No sir," Liam told him, his voice full of certainty and confidence. Liam always felt so unsure about his ability to play and play well enough to make the team but with George sitting in front of him reassuring him, it helped Liam a lot. "I won't let you down and I certainly won't let myself and this team down."

"Good," he acknowledged. He stood up and instructed Liam to do the same, they briefly shook hands as George began to smile wide. "Now get outta here Payne, I'll see you in the morning."

Liam left the office and let out a sigh of relief. He didn't want to be a disappointment, he had all the attention of England and the football world on him right now. That was a lot for just one person to handle. It was good to know that his coach was on his side during this crazy ride. He met with Niall by their lockers, gathering up his gear and just giving his teammate a reassuring head nod. Everything was fine. They walked to their cars that were parked in the underground parking area and said their goodbyes there. Liam wanted to go straight home and just finish his day sitting in his favorite chair and read a good book. If the press knew that about him they probably wouldn't believe it. They had all these preconceived notions about who Liam Payne was, but none of them knew the real him. At twenty one he should be in a different pub each night instead of curled up at home with a good book. His older sisters would joke that he'd end up being a cat lady if he kept up on this path. 

It was a life he'd grown accustomed to though. He was never the boy who had tons of mates, always a few people he kept close, but not too close. It wasn't until he joined the under twenty one team that he felt confident enough to have real friends. Niall was the one who stuck with him the longest, the most honest and true person he'd ever met. Besides football they shared a similar interest in music and everyday things. He was pumped when Niall got called up to join the team full time, if it wasn't him at least it was someone he knew. Then it was his turn to join the team, be part of a community he longed to be a part of. In the three short weeks of practices Liam could see himself being there long term, even when Marcus returned. He now had lifelong friends. 

Liam laughed at the special ringtone he had for Harry, the Doctor Who theme song, as his phone rang a few minutes after he got home. "Didn't I just leave you?"

"I heard George wanted to speak to you. Wanted to make sure everything was okay," Harry explained. "Us newbies need to stick together, Payno."

"I'm fine Haz, everything is good," he assured him. Liam dragged his gym bag into his room, leaving it at the foot of the bed, too tired to unpack it. "So, that's all you called me for? Made sure I still had a job."

"No," he scoffed and Liam could just imagine the face Harry was making at his question. Harry always seemed so exasperated when it came to Liam. It was one of the many quirks to their friendship. "Lou decided to cater this grand dinner for no apparent reason and I wanted to invite you over."

Liam took a seat on the edge of his bed to take off his shoes, his phone cradled between his ear and shoulder. "Why are you inviting me and not Louis himself?"

"I don't know, he just kept mumbling something about being busy and not having enough time," Harry laughed. "Dinner starts at six, I'll be there as will Niall and I think he was trying to convince Eleanor to come as well."

"I won't be intruding?" Liam asked, a nervous feeling pooling in his stomach. He was still new to this small group of friends, he didn't want to overstay is welcome by showing up uninvited. 

"What? Liam no," Harry replied. "I'm inviting you because Lou ask me to, don't look at it as a pity invite either, okay?"

"Fine," he finally gave in with a sigh. He adjusted himself comfortably on his bed, his head resting against the soft comforter his mother had bought him a few months before. "I'll be there at six then."

"Good," Harry replied, his voice firm and filled with excitement. "Can't wait to see you there Payno."

*****

Louis was a ball of nerves as he walked erratically around his flat. Why did he decide to throw a little dinner party at that last minute? That was never in his nature, to be so hospitable. He rarely had people over, usually just Harry, Eleanor, and Zayn. And they never were over together at the same time. Now he was expecting close to five or six people in his place at once. Being the oldest of seven siblings Louis was use to the chaos that a loud home had but ever since he moved out he constantly craved the quiet nowadays. The caterers were milling about his kitchen, shutting cupboards loudly and clanking all his pots and pans. Louis could already feel the headache forming behind his eyes. It was just going to be the last time his small group of friends were going to be in England at one time. Eleanor was flying to Malta soon to film a new movie, Zayn was back in the studio throughout London and due in Los Angeles soon. Niall and Harry were taking off for Singapore in a week, Liam, the newest member of their crew obviously going along with the team. That was going to leave Louis alone with his thoughts and worries. A dinner party was a perfect way to distract him from everything. 

"Remember when I said I didn't need a personal assistant," Louis casually told Harry as he changed out of his gym clothes. There was too much chaos happening in his flat so he decided to box away his anxiety in his complexes gym. "I may have lied."

Harry laughed at Louis's apparent anxiety rant. He always moved a mile a minute, his skin practically vibrating. "Lottie does keep volunteering her services."

"She just wants to get outta Doncaster," he scoffed, jumping up to get his jeans up past his hips. "I won't have my little sister on my payroll, too much tension."

"Gem is always available," Harry suggested. 

"I won't have your older sister on my payroll," Louis told him, eyes skimming the room for his shirt. "Where the hell is my shirt?"

Harry laughed as he stood up and walked up to Louis, placing his hands gently on his hips to calm him down. He placed a kiss on his exposed collarbone, goose bumps appearing on his skin instantly. He took one of his hands off of Louis's hip and laced it with his hand that was reaching for his hair to run his fingers through it. "Breathe love. Don't get yourself worked up over everything now. Let's enjoy the quiet dinner with our friends, okay?"

"You know what else would calm my nerves besides breathing?" Louis asked, a smirk on his face and a slight wiggle of his eyebrows. 

"Louis!" He gasped, not at all shocked over Louis words honestly. "I will not do anything like that with strangers in the next room."

"Fine," Louis shrugged. "I'll do it then, but you have to keep quiet."

"Stop," Harry scoffed and pushed himself away. "I'll check in with the caterers while you finish. Cheeky pervert."

"You love it," he called to Harry as he watched him walk away. 

An hour later Louis's flat was buzzing with music from his massive stereo system and the small crowd that already was gathered. The caterers were finishing up the first course as Niall and Eleanor arrived. Harry severed as host while Louis stayed in the kitchen and watched everything like a hawk. Why did he decide to do this again? Liam showed up shortly after Niall, a bottle of wine in his hands as a little gift. Louis took it graciously and chugged from the bottle quickly, hoping it would calm his nerves. Harry escorted Liam back into the living room where they started to chat with Eleanor and Niall before taking their seats around the spacious dining room table. For someone who lived alone and rarely had company Louis certainly had a home big enough to entertain dozens. 

"Am I late?"

Louis sighed from where he sat at the head of the table and rolled his eyes. "Some things never change with you Malik, I swear. Hurry up and sit down, there's an empty seat next to Liam."

Liam froze as soon as Zayn Malik walked in the door so casually, like it was his own place. No one told him Zayn was gonna be coming, he would've showered beforehand, maybe throw on some nicer clothes and better smelling cologne. He felt his heart begin to beat faster in his chest when Zayn pulled out the chair next to him to sit down. They exchanged quick head nods as greetings. Liam's eyes stayed focused on the salad in front of him, never wanting to look at Zayn directly. He felt like the sun, something you only casually glanced at, never staring directly at it. 

"So nice of you to finally join us," Louis continued his rant. "I didn't slave over a hot stove all day so you can just drop by when you seemed fit."

"You cook?" Zayn scoffed. "That'll be the day."

"Fuck off," Louis laughed. "I set the table at least."

"Why am I always the only girl?" Eleanor asked with a groan. "Surrounded by you lot ruins my reputation."

"Your reputation," Louis repeated with a snort and stabbed at his salad loudly with his fork, the utensil clanking loudly on the porcelain dish. "You mean Hollywood's newest British import? Courtesy of me by the way."

"No shop talk while we eat," Harry suggested grumpily. "Let's have a civil family dinner please."

"Yea Tommo, you should listen to Haz," Zayn remarked, a smirk on his lips as he looked directly at Louis. "He's gonna be a doctor so we know he's brilliant."

"How about we redirect the conversation," Louis suggested, glaring at Zayn. His friend was dead, after the dinner of course. "Liam, how was your day?"

Liam froze when Louis spoke to him. He was supposed to talk now, in front of everyone, in front of Zayn! That was just cruel and unusual punishment. "F-fine. Had practice and spoke to George about my image."

"How does it feel Haz to be the only one not written about on a daily basis?" Niall asked, genuinely curious. 

"Good," Harry answered skeptically with a shrug of his shoulders. "Never really noticed until now how all my friends are famous. You're just normal people to me."

"Zayn's a superstar," Niall interjected. "Smashing records and lighting the world on fire."

"Stop," Zayn begged Niall. "Harry said no shop talk and we should respect his wishes."

The rest of the dinner ran relatively smoothly, thankfully for Louis. He did catch Liam blatantly staring at Zayn every once in a while. Liam's cheeks would immediately flush and Louis caught his mouth hanging open on more than one occasion. It was all a little too funny for him, everywhere he went with Zayn someone was bound to be star struck and start to drool, it just came with the territory. But to see someone who was just as widely as famous as Zayn act that way around his friend was hysterical. Other than Liam's obvious obsession with Zayn he ended up blending in with the rest of the group effortlessly. He was comfortable around Niall and Harry already so that helped tremendously. Eleanor acted like the mother hen, a roll she begrudgingly dubbed herself as. As the only female she took it upon herself to be a force of authority within the band of misfits. 

Luckily the food wasn't bad either, the caterers actually served an impressive meal. The food was so good that not a lot of conversation was happening. Everyone seemed fine with that, it just mattered that they were all together in one place at one time. In a few days they were all going to be torn away from each other for work purposes. It was a genius idea for Louis to actually host the dinner in the first place. When they did talk Eleanor talked about her upcoming movie and her excitement for it to be filming in Malta. Niall went on and on about all the things he wanted to see in Singapore, all the things Liam had researched for them. Harry quickly jumped on that conversation, just as excited as Niall was when he spoke. Zayn added little stories about his upcoming studio sessions, producers and writers he was planning on working with. As he spoke Liam hung on every word he said like it was gospel. Liam had to mentally scold himself often, trying to remind himself that he was in public. The dinner was no place to like a crazed, love struck fan. 

"Still won't let me smoke in here Tommo?" Zayn asked after dinner, the dishes cleared from the table and already in the dishwasher. Zayn played with the cigarette between his fingers, a nervous habit. 

"Balcony," Louis answered and pointed to his spacious balcony that was just off the living room. "You know that shit smells."

"You use to smoke!" Zayn huffed at his friend with a laugh and walked towards the balcony door. He swung it open, muttering under his breath at how unfair Louis was. He stepped outside, closing the door behind him, and quickly lit his cigarette. 

"Can I join?" Liam's question startled a peaceful looking Zayn. He was lounging comfortably on a patio chair, eyes closed and his cigarette dangling from his mouth. "Sorry. I-I'll go inside of you want to be alone."

"Sit," he instructed Liam, patting the chair next to him lazily. "You smoke?"

"Not supposed to," he answered with a shrug and took a seat next to Zayn. "If coach found out he'd kill me."

"It'll be our little secret then," Zayn laughed, winking his direction. 

Liam's heart dropped to his stomach, suddenly feeling sick. It was a quick joke and it made Liam's inside feel like they were burning him alive. He was having a conversation with Zayn Malik, and he swore he was flirting with him. It was widely known that Zayn was openly bisexual, never wanting to hide that fact in the press. It's what drew Liam in the first place. To see someone so young and open about their sexuality, never caring about the public's opinion of him. That tied in with his extreme talent made Liam feel like he knew Zayn before he ever met him. 

"So, I hear you're a fan," Zayn told Liam, who's eyes grew wide at the comment. "No, no, it's okay. It's cool. Lou mentioned it to me after you guys met."

"What else did he mention?" Liam asked and inhaled from his cigarette, letting that smoke escape from his mouth slowly. 

"You're a huge football star, or will be once the season starts," Zayn answered and tried to hide his smirk as Liam's face went red. "Didn't need Lou to tell me that though, you're all the papers are talking about."

Liam shifted in his seat, feeling overwhelmed and a little uncomfortable. He was carrying a conversation with Zayn Malik like they were two old friends catching up on life. What was reality? 

"You're cute when you blush like that," Zayn noticed and lazily dragged the back of his hand along Liam's stubble jaw line. 

"Umm, thanks," Liam responded, rolling his eyes at his own comment. Words were getting caught his in throat, he could feel it tighten as he tried to swallow. "You're gorgeous."

Zayn chuckled, his shoulders shaking as he laughed. "Are you flirting with me Liam Payne, big football star?"

"Yes," Liam replied, trying to sound confident. When was he ever going to get this opportunity again? He was going to take it and run, hopefully have a good outcome. He snuffed out his cigarette in the ashtray provided and smiled weakly over at Zayn. 

"Good," he said with a nod. "I was hoping you were."

"Y-yeah," Liam replied, his voice a little shaky. 

Zayn hooked his leg around the leg of the chair Liam sat on and pulled it closer. Liam could smell the smoke on Zayn's breath they were now sitting that close, all of this made him feel a bit dizzy. "You coming to El's party next week?"

"I-I wasn't invited," he croaked out. Zayn's voice was all low and husky, this was all something out of a dream he once had when he was younger. Staring up at Zayn's picture on his wall back in Wolverhampton and silently praying for this moment. 

"No one is invited," Zayn laughed, his voice still low, practically whispering in Liam's ear. "You should come. I'll be there, I'd love to see you."

"I'll-I'll be there," Liam agreed, still feeling dizzy. This wasn't how he wanted everyone to know he was gay. He knew his new friends wouldn't have an issue with it but it still felt wrong. It felt right at the same time though, confirming his sexuality by openly flirting with Zayn Malik. Not too shabby if you asked Liam. 

"Malik! Payno! How long does it take to smoke a damn cigarette!" Louis voice intruded. "I've got a cheesecake waiting."

Zayn rolled his eyes at Louis voice, loud enough to be heard through the glass patio door. "Let's go."

*****

Liam tried to go through the motions the rest of the week, it was rather difficult though. His mind kept replaying the five minutes he had alone with Zayn at Louis's house. He couldn't wait for the week to hurry up so he could go to Eleanor's party and see Zayn again. That's all that took up his mind. The rest of the dinner went relatively normal, nothing out of the ordinary. Louis did keep giving him strange looks throughout dessert, like he knew something but couldn't quite put his finger on it. Zayn kept acting like nothing was bothering him so Liam tried to do the same. So, he flirted with Zayn and basically outed himself to the world's biggest music star, no big deal. He couldn't let it preoccupy his thoughts. He had a busy week ahead of him. After Eleanor's party he along with Harry and Niall were on their way to Singapore. He was going to be playing in his first game. The nerves kept twisting in his stomach like knots. 

His mother called at least once a day to give him a pep talk. He always rolled his eyes as she spoke and scoffed at her obvious crying but it did warm his heart. He'd would be lying if he said he wouldn't miss her voice while he was away. When no one showed up to his sixteenth birthday party it was his mother who picked him up and wiped away his tears with no judgment. His mother was his best friend, as odd and strange as that sounded. He didn't care though, she was the only person who stood up for him when others tried to drag him down. It didn't matter now anyway, he was surrounded by great people and finally feeling comfortable in his skin for the first time in his life. He saw how easy it was for people like Niall and Harry, never letting the little things get to them, at least not openly. 

The day of Eleanor's party felt like it dragged on forever. Liam tried to preoccupy his time by packing and repacking his bag at least three times. Going through his list to make sure he didn't forget anything, it didn't work though. Adrenaline was soaring through his veins, he felt like he was actually vibrating with excitement. In a few short hours he was going to be in a dark club in the heart of London where Zayn Malik was expecting him. He showered and shaved, anything to take his mind off of Zayn. He even called his mother one last time and spent a good fifteen minutes chatting with his father about his upcoming game. His sister Ruth jumped in on the conversation to tease him about an article their local newspaper had written about him, using an embarrassing picture she may have provided them with. It was a good distraction, put his mind at ease about a lot of things. 

"Payno," Niall groaned as Liam quickly ran back into his room to check his reflection out one last time. "You look fine, can we hurry it up."

"He always like this?" Harry asked Niall, his hands placed on his hips and lightly tapping his foot in impatience. "Liam, I'm sure you look fine but we really need to get going. Lou'll have our heads if we're not there soon."

"I'm ready," Liam declared, stepping out of his room. "Do I look okay?"

"It's El's birthday," Niall huffed and dragged Liam out the door, Harry trailing right behind them. "Who cares?"

The entrance to the club was swarmed with photographers and security. Cameras going off every few minutes, the photographers screaming at anyone who would listen, hoping to get a picture of whoever walked through the doors. Liam was shocked when he heard his name being yelled, everyone trying to grab his attention. Niall grabbed onto his elbow to help escort him into the club. They both waved politely to the press outside, hoping they would leave them alone once they got a few good pictures. It was a bit overwhelming for Liam, it was one of the first times he had really came in contact with the press. He was use to being written about, the article usually using on old photo of him. Now it was much different, now he had people who worked for the ratty tabloids calling his name. Niall looked unfazed by it all as he continued to escort Liam and laughed alongside Harry who looked calm at the chaos around them. 

Inside the club wasn't any different then outside. Bodies were scattered everywhere, there wasn't much room to walk comfortably. It was still early, Liam couldn't imagine how packed the place would be in just a few hours. Harry walked towards the bar, Niall and Liam walking behind him, squeezing past people. Liam kept scanning the crowd, looking for any sign of Zayn. He was supposed to be there and was expecting him and that was all Liam could think about. Within minutes of them getting to the bar Louis spotted them, excited to see them. He kissed Harry quickly and greeted Niall and Liam with a pat on their backs. He was in charge of the party and Liam could see how nervous he was, he kept chewing on his bottom lip in worry. He seemed to calm down a bit after Harry whispered something in his ear that Liam guessed he didn't want to know. 

"Zayn coming?" Liam asked, voice loud over the music. 

"Should be here soon," Louis answered, checking his phone quickly. "Let's go Harold, there's a few people here I want you to meet."

Niall took a long sip of his beer before passing Liam his drink, his head bobbing along to the music. "We should go find El, this is her party after all."

Liam cast a quick look at the entrance, hoping for any sign of Zayn. "Y-yeah lets go."

Niall and Liam eventually caught up with Eleanor, wishing her a happy birthday which she thanked them for. They carried on a conversation about nothing and everything, Malta and Singapore the main topics. Liam was just dreading the inevitable jet lag he was going to have, and a hangover too. It was obvious to anyone looking at him that his mind was somewhere else, totally preoccupied. Harry and Louis were still missing, not even amongst the massive crowd. One of Eleanor's friends tried to distract Liam's mind by asking him questions about the upcoming season while Niall was whisked away by another friend to dance. Liam was cordial and polite, answering all the girls questions the best he could. Eleanor just kept laughing at the onslaught of questions he kept getting asked. Some friend she was. 

"Look who I found waltzing in, trying to go unnoticed," Niall called to the small group, finally getting off the dance floor. 

Eleanor shook her head in amusement and clicked her tongue. "If Lou found out you just showed up he'd kill you."

"Where is he?" Zayn asked, throwing his arm over Eleanor's shoulder and planting a smacking kiss to her cheek. "Happy birthday babe."

"Getting his dick sucked in the janitors closet," she answered casually. 

"Sounds about right," Zayn laughed. "Hi Liam."

Liam froze, his hand going tight around his glass. "Hi."

"I'm glad you're here," Zayn told him, winking in his direction and removing his arm from Eleanor. "You look good."

The blush on Liam's cheeks matched his red and black plaid shirt, which he wore with tight black trousers. It was nothing compared to the red Henley Zayn wore with black jeans, a black leather jacket hanging loosely off his small frame. His body was made for clothes. "Thanks. You-you too."

"I can tell when I'm not wanted at my own birthday party," Eleanor scoffed. "Lucky for you two I'm not easily offended. Let's go Ni, I feel like cockblocking Lou and Haz."

If someone told Liam earlier that morning how his night would turn out, he'd laugh in their faces. Two hours and many drinks later he was being pushed against the cold tile that lined the men's bathroom, Zayn whispering hotly into his ear, his hands gripping tightly at his hips. He doesn't even remember how he got there, what series of events lead him to this exact location. Last thing he remembered was Niall and Eleanor leaving him alone with Zayn. There was a conversation between them, flirty words exchanged, blushing cheeks hidden and smiles wide. Other than that, Liam has no idea what happened. He was far from complaining though, the things Zayn were saying to him was doing more than a good job. 

"You like this?" Zayn whispered, biting at his ear while his hands went to his belt. 

Liam couldn't even get the words he wanted to say out, just pushing up into Zayn's hands. His head was a mess of thoughts and alcohol, a lethal combination. 

"You're already so hard for me and I haven't even touched you yet," Zayn purred, a smirk on his face, his palm rubbing against Liam's zipper. "Good boy Leeyum."

Things were moving too fast and not fast enough for Liam, gripping hard to Zayn's biceps as he continued to press his palm forward, driving him mad. He had no idea what was going to happen next and that just lit his insides on fire in excitement. The sheer thought that they might get caught wasn't lost on Liam, it drove him even more insane then he anticipated. Zayn licked up his neck, leaving kisses in its wake as he finally, slowly, undid Liam's belt with one hand, the other one placed tightly on his hips. 

"You gonna moan for me?" Zayn asked, voice hoarse. "Tell me how good I'm making you feel."

Liam gulped in a breath as he felt his zipper being undone, the button next. "Y-yes. God, yes!"

"You're so hot when you're flustered," he complemented him, moving him forward to get his pants and briefs off past his hips. Zayn looked down quickly and smiled wide at Liam, looking him directly in his eyes that were now blown wide. "Nice. Very nice."

The color of Liam's cheeks now matched his shirt, which was being bunched up around his armpits. Zayn kissed his mouth briefly before making his way to his collarbone, kissing his cheek and neck on his way. He still didn't touch him though, just left him hanging. The hand that undid his pants was now in his hair, yanking lightly at that tiny strains he had. It was overwhelming in the most beautiful way possible. Liam could feel his cock leaking, begging to be touched, and if Zayn wasn't going to do it Liam would have to resolve the issue himself. 

"Zayn," Liam gasped, bucking his hips forward looking for any type of friction, something, anything. 

"What?" He asked, moving his mouth inches away from the nice bruise he was sucking on Liam's collarbone. "What do you want Leeyum?"

"Touch me," he breathed out, agony oozing from his voice. "Please."

"Begging?" Zayn huffed, amused. "Tell me what you want babe and I'll give it to you."

That was such a loaded question that it knocked Liam's concentration off from the current situation. What did he want world renowned superstar Zayn Malik to do? So much and nothing all at once. 

"Babe," Zayn called to him, his right hand scratching at the hair on Liam's stomach, dangerously close to his cock. 

"Your-your hand," Liam finally spoke, his words coming out shaky. "Just get me off."

"With pleasure," Zayn smirked. He pushed Liam's pants and briefs a little lower so they were around his knees, a pleased smile on his face. He kissed his lips as his hand finally touched him where he wanted it the most. His thumb rubbed at the slit, feeling all the precome that was leaking. "You're so wet for me."

Liam's head was a mess, dizzy from all the emotions that was running through him. It was maddening as Zayn's hand worked him painfully slow, groans escaping his lips with every upstroke. Liam looked down and nearly passed out at the view, Zayn's long, slim fingers wrapped around his cock was such a beautiful sight. He could see his lips moving but couldn't make out what he was saying, the sound of his own heartbeat echoed in his ears. All Liam could do was rest his head against the cold tile and just enjoy. He bucked his hips forward as Zayn went faster, fucking up into his hand. This was all too much. 

"I'm-I'm close," Liam croaked out. Besides Liam's occasional groans of pleasure the bathroom was quiet, the sound of skin on skin echoing in the stall.

"Come on babe," Zayn encouraged him, his smile still wide. His face was pressed into Liam's chest, breathing heavy. 

Liam let out a broken moan as he felt his stomach tighten. He didn't want this to end but he needed a release. With a few more sure strokes from Zayn, Liam was coming undone underneath him. Grabbing on to whatever his hands could find, Zayn's shoulders. Zayn kissed at Liam's exposed skin as a way to calm him down, both their hearts beating fast. Liam shuddered as Zayn stroked him one final time before bringing his hand to his mouth. If Liam wasn't dizzy before he sure was now, watching Zayn lick his fingers and palm clean. It was filthy and breath taking all in one. 

"Good boy," Zayn hummed around his fingers, sucking his thumb into his mouth. 

"Thank you," Liam told him skeptically, putting his clothes back in order. He didn't know the proper protocol after receiving a handjob from someone he hardly knew. 

"No problem," Zayn laughed, walking to the skin to wash what was left on his hands off. Fixing his own hair and clothes before turning back to Liam. "Let's go before someone notices we're missing."

*****

Louis hated saying goodbye to Harry. His home was too quiet now, his life was too quiet. He saw Harry off to the airport once the party wrapped up. A car waiting for him outside his flat. They spent their last moments together wrapped in each other's arms, whispering words for only them to know. He was only going to be gone for only a few days but those days were going to feel like an eternity for Louis. He knew he was going to have work and his friends and family to busy up his time but it wouldn't be the same. Harry wasn't going to pop in and surprise him, a story about nothing ready to be told. It was the first time since they started doing whatever they were doing that they were going to be apart. It was the first time since Louis realized his feelings for Harry that they wouldn't see each other every day. Louis just had to keep reminding himself to keep busy. He got up around noon, showered and demanded Zayn's presence in his home. If he was going to be alone, he was making sure his best friend was right by his side. 

"Breakfast!" Zayn called when he let himself into Louis's place. "We've got eggs, pancakes, French toast, and turkey bacon. Where's my coffee?"

Louis hummed at the sight of all the food. "You're my favorite person."

"You say that so much it's starting to lose its meaning," Zayn teased, dumping the cartons of food on the dining table. "You okay Lou?"

"Y-yea," he assured him, a quick head nod. "Let me eat something first and we'll talk."

Louis and Zayn filled their plates to the brim with all the food, Louis drowning his in syrup. Zayn laughed and poured his into a small bowl so he could dunk he pancakes and toast, without all the mess. They grabbed their coffee and moved to sit outside on the balcony. They sat in relative silence, talking here and there about people who they saw at the party. Louis kept avoiding Zayn's eye contact, not wanting him to see his eyes. Besides still being bloodshot, Louis's eyes always said things his mouth was afraid to. Especially after close to fifteen years of friendship, Zayn knew how to read Louis like a book. 

"Spill," Zayn finally spoke. He placed his dishes on the table that sat between him and Louis. He reached into his pocket to pull out his pack of cigarettes. 

"Give me," Louis told him, snatching a cigarette from the pack and putting it to his lips. "Light?"

"Oh, so it's that type of conversation we're gonna have," Zayn laughed and passed his lighter to Louis after lighting his own cigarette and inhaling deeply. "What happened Lou?"

Louis sighed and coughed after inhaling his first pull, the smoke burning his throat and felt it settle heavy in his lungs. Yep, that's why he stopped smoking over a year ago. These things were gross. "I told Harry I loved him."

"What!" Zayn exclaimed, nearly falling out of his chair at his friends confession. He had to be hearing this wrong, the music from the club last night still ringing in his ears. "You did what?"

"This morning before he left, as we said our final goodbyes. I kind of just let it out," Louis elaborated, slumping forward in his seat, shoulders hunched as the cigarette dangled from his lips, moving as he spoke. 

"And?"

"That's it," he sighed. "He never said anything. I didn't expect him to say it back but he could've said anything! A thank you would've sufficed even. He just got in the car with Niall and took off to Heathrow."

"Whoa," Zayn let out slowly, letting the weight of Louis's story wash over him. He knew he always teased him over being in love with Harry but he didn't know it was actually true. He looked over at Louis who looked so lost and out of it, despite the massive hangover he must've had. He hadn't seen his friend like this in years, he had left the lost and confused Louis behind in Doncaster. The self assured, confident Louis just fit in better with his London lifestyle. "You gonna be okay, babe?"

"Yea," he told him, a little unsure. He honestly didn't know if he was truly going to be okay. He had never told anyone, other than his family and friends, that he loved them. Harry was the first. When he was a teenager he thought he could've loved Eleanor but realized that it was more of a mutual admiration for each other than love. At twenty three he was in love for the first time and it scared the shit outta him to be quite honest. "It feels good to get it off my chest honestly."

"Yea," Zayn agreed and snuffed out his cigarette in the ashtray. "I jerked Liam Payne off in the bathroom."

Louis's posture changed quicker than Zayn could blink. His once slumped shoulders were now set straight and he sat up, eyes wide at the bombshell that was just dropped. "Holy shit. What the fuck bro, way to bury the lead."

"I wasn't even going to tell you," he confessed sheepishly. "You looked like you needed some cheering up though."

"Oh my god," Louis huffed, his hair moving from in front of his eyes at the puff of air escaped his lips. "Wha-what happened? I want all the details, like all the details."

So Zayn did just that, told Louis all he could remember from the night before. How everything started out so innocent, talking by the bar while everyone else was off enjoying themselves. Words whispered into each other's ears so they could be heard over the loud music. Cheeks that were blush red from the mixture of the words being exchanged and the alcohol coursing through their veins. Casual, lingering touches to the back of their necks or the small of their backs, any kind of skin on skin contact. Kisses to the side of the mouth that made them crave for more. Offers to leave the place entirely and have a different kind of fun at Zayn's flat. The thought of Louis finding out and killing them for leaving the party led them to the bathroom stall. Groping hands and husky voices echoing through the room. When it was over, Zayn silently craved for Liam to return the favor. Wanted to feel his hot skin on him, to make him feel good. It was so cliché but exactly what Zayn wanted. 

"You like him," Louis noticed after Zayn's story was finished. "Like properly like him."

"I do not," he quickly scoffed at the comment. "Don't even know him."

"Well, you're physically attracted to him," Louis clarified. "Holy shit, Liam Payne is gay or at least bi. That's quite awesome."

"Louis," Zayn groaned, throwing his head back. "Can we not speculate on a complete strangers sexual orientation? That's not cool."

"Sorry," he apologized with a roll of his eyes. "This is great though. The more times you see him and eventually fuck him, the more likely he'll sign with me."

"I will not sleep with him just so you can have him as a client," Zayn sighed, disgusted at Louis's idea. "That's low, even for you bro."

"Think about it though," Louis told him with a shrug of his shoulders. "Come on, I'm stuffed and it's way past nap time."

"You just woke up!" Zayn laughed. 

"I've had an emotional morning," Louis groaned as he stood up and stretched his arms over his head. "I need a nap and a cuddle with my best mate."

"Fine," he gave in with a sigh, standing up as well. 

*****

Liam was way past exhaustion when he finally got into his hotel room. The long flights sucked out every ounce of energy from his body. During the layover in Dubai he tried to stretch his legs and fuel up on caffeine but as soon as the second flight took off he was asleep on Niall's shoulder, snoring softly. He threw his bag on the floor by his bed and texted his mother that he had arrived safely before falling face first onto his bed. He hadn't seen a bed, any bed, for almost two days now. The last eighteen hours were spent in the air. He was buzzing with excitement the moment he got to Heathrow, his fellow teammates feeling the same way. Now all he could concentrate on was sleep and lots of it. He had all day tomorrow to explore but now he wanted sleep. Even with the mid afternoon sun beaming into his room Liam was determined to block it out. His body was still on England time, he had to sleep this jet lag off. 

"Liam!"

"Big Payno!"

Liam groaned into his comforter at the loud banging at his door, Harry and Niall's voices being heard on the other side. He literally just spent close to a day being enclosed on a plane with them. Niall sat next to him on both flights, Harry's seat directly across from them both times. He just needed a few hours away from them, away from it all. Was that too much to ask?

"George has an extra set a keys for each room, I can just ask him for yours," Niall's voice threatened, with a teasing tone weaved in. 

"I need bro bonding time," Harry's voice pleaded. 

Liam sighed, standing up and giving in. He cast one last look at his bed, the plush pillows and the heavenly feel of the comforter, before answering the banging at his door. Without saying another word Niall and Harry walked into his room and let out a whistle. Liam was lucky, the view from his window was impressive, looked over the water. Boats tethered to the dock weaving back and forth due to the current coming ashore. Birds were singing in the distance and little kids could be heard laughing. It was picturesque, something straight out of a travel book or a postcard. Liam made a mental note to take a few pictures of the view before he left. 

"Tell him Haz," Niall's voice broke the silence. He was sat on the edge of the bed, legs crossed at the ankles as he leaned against his arms that rested slightly behind him.

Harry bit at his lip with worry from his seat next to the window, he played with the frayed plastic on the room service menu. His eyes kept looking around the room, first at Niall then Liam, going back and forth between the two of them. 

"Harry," Niall repeated, sounding like his was scolding a school child. 

"Louis told me he loved me," Harry blurted out in one breath. Impressive. 

"Okay," Liam replied skeptically. Was that not the correct reaction? By the looks both Harry and Niall gave him, he was going with no. "Umm I mean, really? What the hell was he thinking?"

"It's okay," Harry laughed at Liam's attempt to seem outraged. "I do realize I've been quite vague about the details of my relationship."

"Explain," Niall offered. "I can't take all your moping about by myself."

Harry shifted in his seat, uncomfortable with all the attention on him. He was usually use to everyone's eyes on him, loved the draw of the attention, now it was different. Now he had to share a part of him he always held so close to his chest. Everyone knew about him and Louis from the outside, no one got to know what it was like on the inside. Just the two of them alone, cuddled on Louis's couch, a cooking show playing low in the background. The whispered words and the soft forehead kisses that made butterflies fly in Harry's stomach. Sensations that made him feel like he lived a lifetime in those moments even though he'd only lived a short twenty one years. Louis's curious questions about the classes Harry was taking at uni, all the science classes that made Louis's eyes cross at just the thought of them. All the industry parties Harry had gone to as Louis's date, people from Zayn's record label knowing his name and commenting about how they looked like a handsome couple together. 

"So, what's the problem?" Liam finally asked, stifling a yawn with the back of his hand. "It seems like that's exactly what you wanted."

"It's is, but it's not," Harry sighed, running his long fingers through his even longer hair. "Lou saying those words is exactly what I wanted to hear but now it changes everything."

"See why I made him come here to talk to you," Niall laughed, still lounging comfortably on the bed. The bed Liam still desperately wanted to nap on. "We've been going around in circles since we left Dubai. My head's still spinning."

Liam remained standing and tried his best to help Harry work through his thoughts. It was all a little distracting for him honestly. It did help to take his mind off his own issues. While Harry was having an emotional crisis about Louis confessing his feelings, Liam was still trying to understand what had happened between him and Zayn. It was still a blur to him, not knowing what parts he made up in his head and what was real. As Harry spoke on and on about his dilemma, Liam traced his fingers over the tattoo on the inside of his arm, the one that held lyrics to one of Zayn's songs. It was from the song "You and I", his first international number one hit, the song that earned him a Grammy, Brit, and Aria all in the same year. I figured it out was now forever going to be marked on his skin, a reminder of who he once was and who he now had become. It was the simplest of things but it meant so much to an nineteen year old Liam who was just coming to grips with his life. 

"Sounds like a wicked idea to me," Niall said, clapping his hands. "Can I please go to sleep now?"

"You think it'll work Liam?" Harry asked, his bright eyes filled with wonder and hope, his bottom lip raw from biting it so much. 

"Y-yea," Liam answered, feeling guilty. He was so lost in his own thoughts that he had no idea what was going on around him. All he could focus on was the taste of Zayn on his lips and the feeling of his tongue hot against his skin. He just hoped he didn't just agree to something completely outrageous. 

"So, once we get back home I break it all off with Lou," Harry concluded, sighing heavy as he stood up. "We're both gonna be busy anyway. The season starts soon and so does school. Yea, yea this is a good idea."

Liam wanted to scream, that sounded like a terrible idea. An idea he had agreed to without knowing he actually agreed to it. Fuck. "If-if it makes you happy Haz."

"It's all settled then," Niall amended. "Now come on Haz, let the boy sleep. We all have a big day ahead of us tomorrow."

"Thank you," Harry told Liam and pulled him into a hug. Liam could feel Harry shaking a little in his arms, overwhelmed obviously from all the emotions running through him. "You're a stand up guy Li."

Liam let Harry and Niall out his room and locked both locks behind them. He sighed and ran his hand through his short hair before throwing himself on his bed once more. He wasn't even in Singapore for more than two hours and everything was turned upside down. He seemingly helped break up a relationship that held real feelings while being too preoccupied with his own clusterfuck of emotions. He sighed into the warm comforter, knowing his trip just began. He still had a game to worry about, his first real game. This was going to be the longest forty eight hours of Liam's short life. 

*****

"We would've been good together, right?"

Eleanor rolled her eyes, dealing with a drunk and over emotional Louis was not how she planned on spending her Saturday night. "Me and you? One of us would've ended up in jail for murder by now."

"We worked well as kids though," he elaborated, the bottle of Jameson in his hand sloshing onto the floor as he spoke. "Zayn would be my best man and whoever you wanted to be your maid of honor. Get married at that little church in Donny that always needed to repair the bell every few years."

"Come on," Eleanor sighed and took Louis by his elbow and dragged him outside to his balcony. She had received at text message from Zayn a little before five that night, Louis was emotional and couldn't be alone. They were going to take shifts watching over him. As soon as she arrived Zayn wished her luck and left, not saying much else as he departed. Thanks for all the help mate. "Fresh air should help."

"Niall texted me when they landed," Louis went on. "I had to find out he was safe from Niall fucking Horan of all people."

"You like Niall," she reminded him with a laugh as they both sat outside. The sun had set just over an hour ago, the beautiful colors holding on for dear life in the sky. Pinks and yellows could be seen peaking through the tall buildings around them. "Why do you need a babysitter Lou? I should be packing for Malta, you're being a horrible manager right now to be quite honest."

Louis sighed and placed the nearly empty bottle on the table that sat between them. He plucked at the loose string on his shirt, twirling it around his finger until it turned cold and blue, losing all feeling in it momentarily. "I told Haz I loved him and now it's been silent on his end."

"For fucks sake Lou!" Eleanor exclaimed, shaking her head. "First of all, he's in bloody Singapore right now so cut him some slack on that end. Secondly, you just dropped a major bomb on this kids head. Let him digest it first before you go all sad and lonely. It's not attractive."

"What if he is shutting me out?" Louis countered, eyebrows raised. He looked like a kicked puppy, a pout on his lips and his nearly crystal blue eyes were looking a bit gray from the booze and the sadness. 

"So what," she scoffed. She shook her head once more and shifted in her seat to fully face Louis and grab his hands between hers. "You're Louis bloody Tomlinson, anyone would be lucky to have you at your most vulnerable, that's when you're at your best. You're an incredible person, Lou. You have so much to offer the world."

"Stop," he paused her. "Don't try to cheer me up with this half assed pep talk."

"I'm not trying to cheer you up," she clarified, moving one her hands to fix the hair that fell in front of Louis's eye. "I'm reminding you of who you are. What makes you so great."

"Go on then," Louis laughed, a genuine laugh that shook his body a little. 

"The fame and success aside, you're a good person," she told him firmly, her voice never wavering. "Helped your mum raise those lot of monsters you call siblings. You got out of Donny and never forgot about your roots. Stood by my side and Zayn too. Never once apologizing for who you are and what you do. That makes you a stand up guy, Tommo."

"Why can't Harry see that?" Louis asked with a hum. "See that I'm more than just the money and the fame."

"He's a kid," she guessed with a shrug. "And I know for a fact he's not sleeping with you because of your money. Give him a little credit."

Eleanor just sat outside with Louis for the rest of the night, until her shift was over at ten. She just let him go on and on, work out his feelings. Half of it didn't even make much sense due to Louis being half drunk off of whiskey. The speeches he gave eventually turned to life back home, when they were kids. How things were just more simpler back then, no nagging press, no meetings, no deadlines to meet. Eleanor didn't have the heart to remind Louis about how miserable he actually was when they were younger. If all this talking was helping, she was more than glad to listen. Things took an interesting turn when Louis blurted out that Zayn had hooked up with Liam during her party. Now that was some shocking and enlightening information for her to receive. 

"How's he doing?" Zayn asked when he arrived. Eleanor left Louis alone on the balcony, swishing the bottle in his hand still. 

"Waxing poetic about each curl on Harry's head," she laughed and patted Zayn's cheek. "Also mentioned about how you hooked up with Liam Payne at my party."

"Bastard," he cursed, scowling at the door Louis sat behind. "Look El, don't say anything, okay?"

"I won't," she assured him and patted his cheek once more. "Just be smart Zaynie. He seems like a good kid, he shouldn't be messed up with all of this. He's got enough on his plate it seems."

"I know," he nodded. "Go home and pack. I'll keep you updated. Thanks for helping me, babe."

Eleanor rolled her eyes, of course she would help. She looked back at Louis who sounded like he was singing some nonsense song at the top of his lungs. That was definitely going to wake the neighbors. She shook her head and kissed Zayn's cheek before grabbing her bag off the couch and leaving. 

*****

Liam was in his absolute element while in Singapore. The sights and sounds it had to offer was exactly what he needed to calm his overworked nerves. Being a tourist alongside Niall and Harry did its job perfectly. Visiting the fishermen and learning so much of the culture sparked a new kind of excitement in Liam. Tasting the fresh catch of the day before taking off and taking in more of the sights. Niall looked a little bored but Harry grabbed onto Liam's arm and actually skipped with him along that cobblestone streets. The sun was hot and the breeze even hotter but that was the least of their worries. The game that was to be played tomorrow was the furthest thing from his mind, Zayn and all that entailed was even further. The sun was about to set, a sign that they all had to make it back to the hotel before curfew. Liam was bummed that his day had to end but excited for all the possibilities of tomorrow.

"Umm lads," Niall's nervous voice called to a still skipping Liam and Harry. 

"Umm Niall," Harry called back to him with a laugh. This was just what he needed to set his mind at ease. Acting like a kid with his friends calmed the anxiety he was feeling in the pit of his stomach since Louis dropped the love bomb on him. 

"We're lost," Niall told them, jogging forward to catch up with them. "Like properly lost."

"No," Liam said and stopped completely so Niall could catch up. He grabbed the oversized map from his hands and turned it around a few times before crumpling it up in his hands. "Yep, we're lost."

"What? No," Harry replied, taking the map and undoing the mess Liam caused. "We're here and the hotel is there."

"Really?" Niall rolled his eyes as the sarcastic comment rolled off his tongue like a reflex. "How much ground could we've covered in the last three hours? We're on a tiny island for god's sake!"

"We're not lost," Harry repeated. "Just temporarily misplaced is all."

Liam joined Niall in the eye roll, Harry was the ultimate optimist. "Curfew is in a half hour and we don't know where we are. How do you think we could correct that Haz?"

"Someone around here must know the way back and speak English," Harry explained, folding up the map correctly. He placed it under his arm and took off, heading straight. "There's little shops up ahead I remember, someone is bound to be able to help us."

The ordeal getting back to the hotel was one Liam would never forget, he now had a story to tell for life. Harry dubbed himself the leader and Niall and Liam let him lead, hopefully he would find a way for them to get back on time. It wasn't as bothersome as Liam thought it was going to be, the walking around in circles hoping to find someone to help them was the most troubling. People were willing to help but there was always an obstacle in their way, the language barrier being the most common. Liam could've sworn that English was commonly spoken throughout Singapore. Harry was determined though, he swore he was going to get them out of this mess. By the time they found someone who could actually help them the sun was fully set, signaling that they were now breaking curfew. 

Shane, a stock boy from the local fruit market had recognized Niall and Liam. He watched as the trio walked around hopelessly, about to give in and give up. Shane explained everything to them as he drove them all back to the hotel. He was seventeen and grew up an Arsenal fan, his father getting him into football at a young age. He just couldn't believe him luck, running into two players who just happened to need help. Once they arrived safely at the hotel Liam and Niall signed whatever Shane wanted singed and posed for tons of pictures, Harry taking them. After explaining everything to George Liam went to his room, now exhausted. He had a big day tomorrow, his first game as a Gunner. He tossed and turned all night, not getting more than three hours of actual sleep. He was so anxious, panic seeping into all his thoughts. It was just an exhibition game, something that didn't even count. It was freaking Liam out though. 

"Eat something," Harry told him early that next morning on the teams bus that was taking them to the stadium. 

"Is this advice coming from a doctor or my friend?" Liam asked as he accepted the apple Harry offered him. 

"Both," he guessed with a shrug. "You look like you're gonna pass out at any minute."

Liam raised his eyebrows, his mouth around the apple. Was he that obvious? 

"I know you have every reason to be anxious," Harry continued. "Try not to be though. It'll effect your game and you won't play well then you'll blame yourself for that. It's a vicious cycle."

"Thanks," Liam told him sincerely. "You don't be nervous out there either. Big day for you too Haz."

"Oh please," Harry groaned and rolled his eyes. "I get to hold the equipment bag, such a big task."

"There's no such thing as small task," Liam replied with a laugh. 

If Liam could relive any moment of his life again he'd clearly chose the last ninety minutes of his life. It felt like he was floating on air once he got back to the locker room after the game. As soon as he stepped on the pitch and just saw the sheer volume of people that packed the stadium, something just clicked inside of him. All the doubts and worries inside of him felt as if they immediately washed away. This was what he was meant to be doing with his life, this was the reason he woke up each and every morning. Bugging his parents to drive him a half hour out of Wolverhampton for practice every Saturday and Sunday morning. Missing life events because of games or tournaments. All the sacrifices now seemed worth it. Leaving home at an early age and leaving everyone behind for ten months out of the year, was worth it. 

As the starting whistle blew Liam saw everything move in slow motion. His teammates around him were all a blur, Niall on the opposite end protecting the goal with his life. The crowds volume was deafening, his ears started to ring immediately. Oli and Harv were right by his side screaming out plays. This was it, it was either now or never for him. This was his one shot to prove it to everyone, to himself. The Singapore team was good, a little too good if Liam was being honest with himself. He was running up and down the pitch, staying focused on the task at hand. It wasn't until the twentieth minute that he could breathe a little bit, Oli had scored at goal. The celebration that followed made him feel included, finally. Oli jumped on his back as they ran around in celebration. 

George gave them an empowering and motivating speech during half time, the kind that made the blood in Liam's veins vibrate with excitement. He could do this, they all could do this. As they geared up for that second half Niall gave him a quick pat on the back while Harry tossed him a bottle of water, a sign of solidarity. It worked because as soon as the second half began Liam was on a roll, nothing and no one stood in his way. He was playing great, doing his job perfectly but he wanted more. He wanted to show the crowd in the stands and everyone back home that he deserved all the attention he was getting. It worked because during the seventy sixth minute he scored his first ever goal. The team went wild, jumping on and around him. Liam could've sworn he heard Niall's shouts from all away across the pitch, he even caught Harry smiling wide at his accomplishment. 

"Welcome to the big times Payne," Harv told him from his locker which was across from Liam's. "Feels good, yeah?"

"Yeah," Liam agreed, still smiling wide. He hoped he never lost his smile, he left so accomplished and confident. 

"Payno! Payno! Payno!" Niall began to chant as he walked back into the locker room after his shower. "When we get back home we're celebrating."

"It was one game," Liam scoffed, he appreciated the support and attention but he knew these guys didn't need to go as overboard was they were. "You were amazing Ni, how many shots did you save?"

"Ten," George answered from where he stood by the locker room entrance. "All of you guys really stepped up, good first effort. Now let's play like that all season and I'll have nothing to worry about. Hurry up lads, we have a flight to catch."

*****

Louis kept looking up at the clock that kept ticking away. He was trying to occupy his mind and time by coming to the office, get things done before the paperwork started to pile up. He saw Eleanor off to Malta yesterday for five weeks with a promise to check in on her at least once a week. He wasn't concerned about it much though, she was a professional and knew how to handle herself on a set. Her PA, Sophia, was tagging along with her, easing Louis's worries a bit. If anyone could put Eleanor in her place besides Louis, it was Sophia. Louis began to type aimlessly at the keys on his laptop, once again checking the time on that clock overhead. Nothing was helping, having two clients really didn't come with a lot of work. All the phone calls that needed to be made had to wait until everyone in Los Angeles was awake. But Louis was awake now and overly anxious. Harry's flight was set to arrive within the next hour or so. He spent the whole day Sunday waiting for the rebroadcast of the game and the highlights on the news. He wasn't even concerned about the game, hoping he could catch a small glimpse of Harry on the sidelines or if he ran onto the pitch to help an injured player. He was never shown but Louis swore he saw a stray curl make its international TV debut when the camera panned to the Arsenal bench. 

After waking up with a massive hangover and Zayn in his bed on Sunday morning, Louis realized he went a little overboard the night before. Drinking away his issues had become his go to defense though. He knew it wasn't healthy or smart but for a short time it fixed everything. Everything had turned upside down in twenty four hours, his comfortable arrangement with Harry now was shrouded with thoughts of confusion. So being in his office to work was exactly what Louis needed to set his mind at ease. Making phone calls to people who were awake, making sure the recording studios Zayn preferred to record in were available when he needed them. Being a boss just came easy for Louis. Being authoritative and demanding respect was all part of the job, at times it didn't sit easy with him but it got the job done. With one more glance at the clock Louis sighed, nothing was going to get done when his mind was elsewhere. He decided to call it a day already, and it wasn't even noon. As he stood up to collect this things, his cell phone rang. Louis could recognize that ringtone anywhere, it was Harry's. 

"Shit," he cursed as he pulled the phone out of his pocket. He took a deep breath to calm his now rapidly beating heart before answering. "Hello."

"Lou," Harry voice greeted him excitingly. "I'm back! Just walked in the front door actually, Niall says hi. He's about to go crash. Oh, I got you the gift I promised you. Can I see you? Where are you? Are you home?"

"I'm at the office," he answered with a laugh. Harry sure loved to go on his tangents. "I was heading back home now actually. Unpack, shower, have a kip, do whatever you need to do. How about we grab dinner tonight? My place around seven sounds good?"

"Yea," Harry answered. "I'll grab Chinese, so don't worry about cooking. Want your usual?"

"Usual sounds fine," Louis replied. He just stood in middle of his office grinning like a damn fool. One phone call and all his doubts were erased. They were good, Harry wasn't freaking out or avoiding him. Things were looking up. 

Okay so maybe Harry wasn't freaking out but Louis certainly was. As soon as he got home from the office he was determined to take a nap but his mind wouldn't shut off. He tossed and turned for what seemed like ages before he gave up and got up. Harry wasn't expected to arrive for another five hours, five hours for Louis to go over every possible scenario. It also gave Louis five hours to call and cancel, chicken out. He couldn't though, he had to face this like an adult, whatever that truly meant. Once he gave up on napping he made a few phone calls, checked up on Eleanor, made sure she was settling comfortably. Got in touch with a few producers and production managers in Los Angeles for Zayn. He basically did anything to distract himself. Around five thirty he jumped in the shower, standing around in just a towel for close to half hour trying to decide what to wear. Harry had already seen him in almost everything he owned. Louis wanted to look his best for this momentous occasion in his life. Harry Edward Styles was going to be his boyfriend by night's end, or at least that was Louis plans. 

He finally decided on black jeans and a plain black shirt he stole from Zayn over a month ago. It was from some fashion show he had been invited to and begrudgingly went to. It was never Zayn's scene but it got his face out to the masses and in return he received free clothes. It was a win for all parties involved. After he was dressed and messed with his hair for at least fifteen minutes it was time to set the mood. Chinese was never romantic but that wasn't going to stop Louis from trying. Dimming the lights in the dining area and living room, lighting a few candles Harry had bought him for his last birthday, their first birthday together. Back then Louis tried not to read too much into it but it was hard. Made Louis want to step up his game for Harry's birthday that next February. Those little memories put a smile on his face, remembering all the little things that got him to where he was now. Louis was madly in love with Harry. 

"Lou!"

"Oi!" Louis called back with a laugh. He stood in the kitchen opening a rather stubborn bottle of red wine. Another little thing to set the mood. 

"Louis!" Harry greeted him when he stepped in the kitchen, wide smile on his face that just made him light up. "I'm home! Did you miss me like you said you were going to?"

Louis couldn't help the reaction that ran through him at the sight of Harry. His heart began to beat faster and he copied his infectious smile. God, he was so gone for this boy. "Miss you? Nope, not even one bit."

"Liar," Harry laughed and hopped on the counter next to Louis to sit. "Admit it, you were absolutely miserable without me."

"I was absolutely miserable without you Haz," Louis obliged him with an eye roll, finally getting the wine bottle open. "Food's on the table?"

"On the table," Harry nodded. "Figured we'd eat like civilized humans for one night."

Louis wasn't T.S. Elliot or John Lennon, he was never good with words. They always felt like they fell short of what he actually wanted to say, especially when he was around Harry. That's why he was never all that upset when his dream of becoming an English teacher was dashed. He wasn't the most articulate, Louis usually let his facial expressions and wild hand movements do all the talking for him. That was also another reason why Louis waited until he was properly smashed to admit his feeling to Harry. He just needed a little liquid courage. Now that everything was out in the open he left more at ease, more relaxed. Dinner was great, Harry knew exactly what he liked and what place to get that food from. The wine and conversation flowed freely, Harry filling him in on all his excursions. How he had gotten lost with Liam and Niall and then finding Shane, their saving grace. Louis just sat across from him at the table and listened, engrossed in everything Harry had to say. If Zayn could see him now he'd most certainly laugh at him. How love sick and foolish this boy made Louis look and feel. 

"Oh! You're gift," Harry remember, wiping his face quickly with the paper napkin that came with the takeaway. 

"You really didn't have to get me anything," Louis huffed, leaning back in his chair and sipping slowly at his wine. 

Harry got up from his chair and rolled his eyes before walking into the living room. "Yes I did. You would've been mad at me if I didn't. I know you far too well Louis Tomlinson."

"Then hurry up and give it," Louis called to Harry. 

"Here," he announced when he got back into the dining room. He put two small shot glasses in front of Louis and sat back down with a proud smile on his face. 

"Shot glasses?" Louis asked, face full of confusion, brow scrunched up under his perfectly tussled hair. "You trying to tell me that I'm a drunk, Harold?"

"No," he replied sharply. "I just noticed that you collect those. You have a whole cabinet in your kitchen of these guys. Glasses from New York, Canada, even Doncaster. Figured why not add Dubai and Singapore to the mix."

Louis placed his wine glass on the table and picked up the shot glasses. He smiled to himself as he inspected them. They were just plain shot glasses, the name of the country loud and bold on both sides of the glass. It was something he started doing when he went on tour with Zayn all those years ago, collecting shot glasses. It was a way of remembering all the places he'd been to. His first one was from New York, the lettering in red, white, and blue with a little picture of the Statue of Liberty on the other side. He eventually added more American cities to the mix as the tour went on. His favorite was from Paris and Milan, he got those right after he signed Eleanor and Zayn to his new agency, a victory gift to himself. No one really knew about his little hobby, except for Zayn and Eleanor. They always teased him endlessly about it, whenever he went somewhere new they always made sure he didn't leave without buying a shot glass as a souvenir.

"Lou," Harry's voice knocked him out of his thoughts. "You like them?"

"Love 'em," he answered. He could still feel the face splitting grin on his face. Harry's gift was so thoughtful and touching, it warmed his heart. "I love you."

Louis wanted the ground to swallow him whole as soon as he shut his mouth. He didn't mean to say that, again. His mind was just running a mile a minute, overcome with all the excitement of the night. His mouth just decided to speak before his brain could catch up. Harry's face went completely white, ghostly white, it freaked Louis out a little. He thought they were okay, they just had a great night full of laughs. 

"Wow," Harry let out slowly and sat back down across from Louis. "I-I guess we're going to do this now."

"I'm so sorry Haz, honestly," Louis apologized, trying to grab at Harry's hands that he kept pulling away slowly. "Not about how I feel, just that I keep bringing it up at the most inappropriate times."

"It's fine," he casually brushed the apology off. "But umm Lou, I can't do this anyone."

Louis sat back and examined Harry's face for any sign of emotion. He didn't look like he was about to crack a smile and laugh, telling Louis this was all a joke. "Do what exactly?"

"This," Harry stressed, pointing between him and Louis enthusiastically. "Before things get too heavy, we should just umm end it, you know? I'm about to start my last year at uni and then I have medical school to worry about. Besides, these things have a short shelf life anyway."

"I just told you that I loved you!" Louis shouted. "And th-this is what you say back! Did you bring food and a gift to soften the blow or something? That'll be really dodgy of you if you did."

"What? No Lou," Harry paused to sigh and run a hand through his mess of curls. "I-I still want to be friends, it's kind of impossible to get rid of you when we do have the same friends."

"You planned this," Louis realized, shaking his head at how unaware he had been all night. He scoffed at his own naivety. "You came here tonight with intentions of doing this all along and I, God, I fell for it."

"Louis."

"Go," he told him, his voice barely above a whisper. "Jus-just go, Harry."

"I'm sorry," he apologized, standing up. He leaned forward to give Louis a goodbye kiss on his cheek which he quickly dodged. "We'll talk soon, yeah?"

"Goodbye Harry," he responded sternly, his jaw clenched tight, willing himself not to lose it until Harry was gone. 

*****

"Liam Payne!"

Liam laughed at how his name was being said. He phone began to ring a few minutes earlier, a Dropkick Murphy's song, Niall's ringtone. "Niall Horan!"

"I've missed you," Niall laughed. "This last week without you has been miserable. We'll always have Singapore though, right?"

"What the-"

"You're free tonight, yeah?" Niall asked, not really waiting for an answer. "So seeing that Haz went home for the weekend I have the place to myself and Louis is demanding that I throw a little party to cheer him up."

"He can't have one at this place?" Liam asked with a scoff. He'd been to Louis's house and it was more than large enough to handle a party. 

"I've learned not to argue with him, honesty," Niall replied. "Anyway. Be at my place around nine."

"I guess I'll be there," Liam responded before saying his goodbyes. 

It was kind of exciting for Liam, getting invited to house parties like he was actually a part of the small group of friends. He had the last week off, no practice, no training, nothing. The next two weeks were going to be brutal though, a quick exhibition game against their biggest rivals, Chelsea, and then the toughest training Liam will ever know. So, getting invited to a party really helped Liam. He had the last week to himself, to do absolutely nothing. He went to the gym twice to just keep his blood pumping but other than that he spent most of his time in bed. The start of the season was quickly approaching and he needed anything, something, to occupy his mind. He already got four tickets to the home opener and mailed them to his family. His mother had already informed Liam that his entire family was attending the match and wearing matching jerseys. It made him smile but also made him nervous, he didn't want to look like a complete disaster in front of everyone. 

"Good you made it," Niall greeted him later that night. "Louis is already gone through a whole bottle of Jameson, so good luck with that."

Liam shook his head as he entered the flat. He'd never been there before but it looked spacious enough for two people, better than his place. "Anyone else here?"

"Oli and Carlos are supposed to stop by. Lou's in the kitchen with Zayn," Niall rattled off. "Harv's playing FIFA with some birds he brought with him."

"Z-Zayn's here?" Liam choked out. Smooth, real smooth Payne. 

"Course," Niall scoffed. "Can't cheer up Tommo without his partner in crime."

"Y-yea," Liam stuttered out. "I'm gonna grab a drink. Tell Harv I've got next round."

Liam walked through the home, saying a quick hello to Harv who was enthralled with his game, a girl sitting on each side of him. Typical Harv honestly. He took in the sights of the place, it was nice, not as extravagant as Louis's place but way better than Liam's. On each side of the living room were two closed doors, he suspected that they were more than likely the bedrooms. As Liam walked closer to the kitchen he could hear Louis's loud voice, drunk already. If he listened closely he could hear Zayn's laugh, something that was already engrained in his mind. The heavy tone of his voice from the cigarettes he smoked, it gave Zayn his allure. With a deep breath, Liam walked as confident as he could into the room. Louis was sitting on the counter, bottle in his hand while Zayn stood next to him, back leaning against the counter by Louis's feet. 

"Payno!" Louis shouted. "Look Malik, your boy Liam is here."

Zayn scowled at Louis and smiled wide at Liam. "Liam."

"Welcome to my cheering up party," Louis properly greeted him, hopping off the counter and making his way to Liam. "Tonight no one is making you chose sides because we're all on team Louis."

"He always like this?" Liam asked Zayn with a laugh. 

"Since we were kids," Zayn confirmed and pulled Louis away from Liam, who was currently slowly circling Liam's personal space. "Tommo, let the kid breath mate."

"Be truthful, be honest," Louis warned Liam, raising a less than threatening finger at him. "You understand Payno?"

"No, not at all," he laughed and looked over at Zayn for help. 

"Tommo, leave Liam alone," Zayn tried to convince him. He walked away from the counter and grabbed at Liam's elbow. "Come with me, Louis needs a time out."

"You're all rubbish," Louis scoffed. "I don't need you lot anyway, I've got Jameson to make me happy."

"Okay, Lou," Zayn laughed and continued to drag Liam out the room. "Have fun!"

"He'll be okay, right?" Liam asked as they walked into the living room. 

Zayn looked behind briefly and laughed at Louis singing softly in the next room. "Y-yea. Lou gets like this but he's harmless to everyone."

The party was good, filled with laughs and stories. Carlos, Oli, and Harv began to retell stories of their first impressions of Niall and eventually Liam. The game on the tv was long forgotten by then, after Liam beat Harv, of course. The stories were enlightening for Liam, hearing what his teammates thought of him before he had truly met them and even after that. It was shocking to hear that they all knew about him from the junior leagues and just whispers within the club. It boosted his confidence immensely, he had a buzz around him before he even knew it. Louis eventually joined the group around the couches and seats around the coffee table. That's when all the other fellows kept asking questions about the music scene and Zayn's plans for his upcoming album. As they spoke so openly Zayn kept shifting closer and closer to Liam as he sat next to him. Liam could feel the heat radiating off of Zayn, that's how close they were sitting. It felt good but odd too. It was an innocent brush of the back of Zayn's hand on Liam's thigh that made him begin to sweat, he could feel the back of his neck and cheeks immediately flare up with a blush. Just the memory of Zayn's hand sent him into a tizzy. 

"You sure no one will notice?" Liam asked as Zayn pushed him up against the door. 

Liam assumed he was in Harry's room just by what he could see around him. He couldn't really make out much, too distracted by Zayn's lips on his, slowly making their way to his neck and collarbone. Once again he had no idea how he ended up here, with Zayn. The party was winding down, everyone around them preoccupied with whatever they were doing. Zayn found Liam alone in the kitchen pouring himself another drink and began to whisper things into his ear that made him feel like putty in Zayn's hands. Now they were making out like teenagers in Harry's bedroom while all their friends were on the other side of the door. 

"I want your mouth," Zayn told him, a smirk on his lips that hovered over the birthmark on Liam's throat. "Couldn't stop thinking about your lips wrapped around my cock."

"Oh my god," Liam breathed out and bucked up against Zayn's hips. 

"Could you do that for me?" Zayn asked. 

"Y-yea," Liam answered, nodding his head. "I'd-I'd like that too."

Zayn's eyes went wide at Liam's agreement, he never really expected him to be so eager. It made it all better for him honestly. He grabbed Liam's shirt by the collar and walked backwards until his legs hit the bed, he fell onto it, Liam falling with him. Liam tried not to crush Zayn by leaning on his elbow that landed next to Zayn's head. He wanted this, he wanted it from the moment he met Zayn. It was only fair to return the favor after Zayn had gotten him off in the club bathroom. 

"You know what you're doing, yeah?" Zayn asked, looking up at Liam.

"Yeah," Liam laughed. It was all thanks to Dan, a boy he shared a room with while he played for the under twenty ones. Liam would sneak in his bed once lights were out, Dan was the one and only boy he'd ever been with. "Pants off."

Zayn obliged happily, shimming out of his jeans and briefs before Liam even had a chance to blink really. His cocked bounced free, laying heavy and beautiful on his stomach. Liam kissed at Zayn's temple, moving to linger over his lips before getting completely off the bed and keeling on the floor. Zayn's head felt dizzy before Liam even did anything, he sat up, resting on his elbows. He wanted to see and enjoy this. 

"You good?" Liam asked, lips hovering over Zayn. 

"Leeyum," Zayn whined, bucking his hips forward. 

Liam gave Zayn a smirk before leaning forward and licking at the underside of his cock. The hiss that Zayn released was exactly what he wanted to hear. He repeated his movements a few times, getting the same reaction out of Zayn, before enclosing his lips around the head. 

"God," Zayn breathed out. "Yo-your lips are made for this."

Liam hummed in appreciation around Zayn's cock, trying to take as much of him in his mouth, his hand covering what his mouth couldn't. Liam continued to breathe heavy through his nose as Zayn grabbed onto what little hair he hair, grabbing for something, anything. He tried to keep his hips on the bed, not wanting to buck up and disturb Liam's technique. The little sounds Zayn let out, the groans and hisses, was exactly what Liam needed to hear to know he was doing a good job. He was nervous when Zayn asked but more than willing, wanting to do anything to return the favor.

"Leeyum," Zayn moaned above him, dropping his elbows and laying flat on the bed. "God, babe I'm close."

That was all Liam needed to hear before sucking harder, faster. Zayn's hand were still in his hair, his grip getting looser. Liam licked at the slit, tasting the pre come that by now was flowing freely. He could get use to that taste of Zayn, sweet but still strong and musky. His head was dizzy and his cock was hard against the zipper of his own jeans, begging to be touched. 

"Come in my mouth," Liam whispered before enclosing his lips around the head once more. 

"Fuck," Zayn moaned. That was all he needed to hear to send him over the edge. He grabbed at the sheets and tried to keep himself from thrashing as he came down Liam's throat. He was breathing heavy, seeing spots in front of his eyes. "Leeyum, God."

"You okay?" Liam asked, joining Zayn on the bed, lying next to him. 

Zayn looked over at Liam and shook his head, laughing. "I'm good babe."

The continued to lay there in silence, their heavy breathing the only thing being heard. If they listened closely the party was still carrying on outside the door. Zayn raised a heavily tattooed hand and rubbed at his eyes, willing his body to wake up again. He felt lifeless, in a good way, of course. 

"No one's gonna notice, right?" Liam broke the silence.

"Don't worry babe," Zayn assured him, tracing his thumb across Liam's bottom lip. "Your secret is safe with me."

*****

Louis was buzzing, being in the studio with Zayn always had that effect on him. It was great to sit back and watch his best friend work. It wasn't often that he got to do it, so when Zayn asked him to join him in the studio, Louis didn't pass up the opportunity. Seeing Zayn be creative, hovering over the soundboard with the producer, pencil between his lips, it made Louis happy. Despite everything that was going on with his personal life, Louis was happy. He wasn't going to lie and say Harry wasn't a distant memory but he was learning to live a life without Harry in it. Work was a great distraction, Eleanor was working hard on her movie in Malta and Zayn was back to work. He was still dead set on having Liam as one of his clients but so far he was keeping that to himself. Every time he tried to bring it up around Zayn he was quickly shot down. It didn't even feel like work at times, sitting back on a soft leather couch and listening to Zayn sing. People would pay good money to be in his shoes right now. See a less than confident Zayn, on stage he captivated his audience, drawing them in effortlessly with his voice and charm. When he was creative it reminded Louis of the little lad he met when they were kids, afraid of the future and what would lie ahead for them. The Zayn that all of the UK met during the X Factor and his first tour. 

"Are you sleeping?" Zayn asked with a laugh. "Some manager you are, bro."

"What?" Louis asked, shaking his head from the daze he was in. "N-no. Just thinking is all. How things use to be, you know?"

Zayn nodded and sat next to Louis on the couch. "Things were easier but this is my life now and I wouldn't change it."

"Always the optimist," he laughed. "Never wanting to rain on anyone's parade, how noble, Malik."

"Lou? You umm, you still going to the game tomorrow?" Zayn asked cautiously. He knew bringing up anything related to Harry was a sore subject. "Ni sent the tickets over this morning, gave me two."

Louis threw his head back and let out a slow breath as he thought the question over. He had promised Niall he'd go to the season opener, he had never missed a home game since they became friends. And then there was the Liam aspect of it all, he had promised him too. That was before all the chaos with Harry began. "Good seats?"

"Right behind their bench like he promised," Zayn answered, resting his head against the back of the couch as well. "If you don't wanna go Lou, we don't have to."

"No, no, no," he gave in with a sigh. "We'll go in support of the lads, watch a good football match and call it a day."

"And if you run into Harry?" Zayn asked, eyebrows raised. 

"I'm an adult," he gasped in feigned shock. "I will act as such."

"It's about time," Zayn muttered under his breath unsuccessfully, Louis heard and kicked him in the shin in retaliation. 

*****

This was it, this was the moment Liam had been waiting for his whole entire life. All the training, all the sleepless nights and long days had lead him here. Driving his mum and dad crazy with kicking the ball around the house even after they told him not to. Nicola and Ruth sacrificing their own lives so their parents could dedicate time to him and his football dreams. Leaving home at such a young age to chase a dream that felt so surreal. It all culminated today, his first official Premier League game. The locker room was quite, too quite. The nerves within the room were palpable, the last six weeks of practice led them all to this day. George gave them one last pep talk, mentioned how they hadn't lost a game all preseason. West Ham was a good team, but they were better. They were the odds on favorite to win the league or at least give Chelsea a real scare this season. It was all muffled noise to Liam anyway, he was trying to calm himself down. His heart was beating out of his chest and his blood was pumping loudly in his ears. He couldn't make a mistake out there and fix it the next day in practice, this was do or die, now or never. 

"You okay Payno?"

Liam looked up at Niall and tried to smile. "Nerves is all."

"Nerves are good, shows you actually care," Niall assured him with a firm pat on his back. "If you weren't nervous you wouldn't want to be here in the first place."

Walking onto the pitch was what hit Liam the hardest, he was actually here. The sounds from the crowd was deafening, made his ears ring. He tried to quickly search the massive crowd for his family, find something to center him. It was no use though, all the faces just sort of blurred together. He knew they were there though, his mom had sent him a picture of the four of them sitting in their seats with his jersey on, massive smiles on their faces. Liam figured that half of Wolverhampton was tuning in to watch him play. He couldn't let that distract him though, he had to focus, concentrate. He shook the hands of the officials and some West Ham players before he saw Niall jog over to the goal post. With a deep breath he ran to the middle of the pitch, just waiting for that starting whistle to blow. Harv and Carlos stood by him, both giving him head nods of encouragement. He could do this, he just had to treat it as any other game and nothing else. Easier said than done though. As soon as the whistle blew Liam was off and running, his adrenaline taking over for him. Here went nothing.

By halftime Liam was past exhaustion, the last forty five minutes were draining. There wasn't a score yet, neither team had yet to find a opportunity to score. Liam was close at least twice but a defender was always in his way ready to block. He did have a small reprieve when he saw Dr. Stewart and Harry run on the pitch when Oli fell hard, it ended up not being that serious at all. He ran over to Harry who handed him Gatorade and patted his cheek, telling him all the encouraging words he needed to hear. Niall even sent him a thumbs up which made Liam laugh, his gloves looked two sizes too big for his hands. It was the perfect distraction that he needed, even if it only lasted three minutes. George kept going on and on about how they needed to be more open, take better shots, be more on target. It was all the things Liam knew he needed to do. Everything was still so nerve wracking for him. The immensity of it all. He was just glad he wasn't doing this alone. His friends and teammates were by his side. 

The second half was when everything took a turn for the worse. The whole team started to play sloppy, none of their shots were even close to being on target. West Ham picked up on that and ended up keeping possession of the ball more than Arsenal. Niall was frazzled too, letting them score two easy goals within minutes of each other. The crowd quickly turned on them, Liam blaming himself for both goals. He knew it wasn't just his sole responsibility but he had no one else to blame. The anger and sadness in Niall's expression showed it all, they were gonna lose their first game of the season. The other team was clearly better this time around. That was the simplest explanation. Once the final whistle blew the crowd started to boo. Not even two hours ago the whole stadium shook with excitement and now they all quickly turned against their home team. It smacked Liam back into reality though. Which he guessed was a good thing, he couldn't live in a fantasy world the whole time. He hung his head as he dragged his feet back to the locker room, wanting desperately to shower and wash the grime from the game and the day off of him. 

"Payne, my office please," George told him.

Liam was waiting for the catcalls from his teammates, but they all remained silent as he followed George to his office. "What's up?"

"Close the door and sit down," he simply instructed him. "Don't look so nervous, son."

"You tell me to come into your office and close the door. I have every right to be nervous, sir," he nervously laughed and sat across from his manager. "Before you begin yelling at me let me just apologize for my shitty playing today. I wasn't focused, too distracted by the immensity of it all. If you want to bench me for next week's game, I'm more than okay with that."

"Payne," George interrupted him with a huffed out laugh. "I'm not here to yell at you. I was actually going to congratulate you."

"C-congratulate me?" He choked out, shocked. "Why?"

George leaned back in his chair, resting his hands behind his head and slowly shook his head. "All you fellas get distracted on your first real game, everyone expects that. I'm impressed at how composed you were out there. Loss or not, we'll just have to deal with it later. Horan knows what he did wrong, the other boys too."

"So you're not mad?" Liam asked. 

"No," he answered. "You really showed everyone and myself why we signed you in the first place. Very valiant effort out there today, Payne. Keep it up and maybe we'll sign you for the rest of the season."

Liam was still surprised by George's words as he left the office and finally got to shower. A majority of the team was already out of the locker room by the time he was finished. Niall stuck around to make sure he was okay before taking off himself. Harry stuck his head inside the room briefly to check up on his as well. Everything was okay, at least for now. Liam got dressed and headed outside the stadium, hoping to find his family. Reporters and photographers lined the gates looking for someone to talk to, looking for a statement from anyone about the game. Liam was in no mood to talk though, still upset about his performance. He gave them all a thumbs up and a small wave before spotting his family by his car. That's where he lost it. His mother embraced him and he just let all his emotions get the best of him. She was sobbing in his chest as he let a few tears fall. She kept reassuring him that he did a good job, that she was proud of him. Liam believed her too, Karen Payne was never one to lie. His father kept reminding him that this was just the first game, he had the whole rest of the first half of the season to prove himself, correct his mistakes. Nicola and Ruth joined in on the encouraging words, letting their little brother know that he had no reason to worry. They were all on his side no matter what. 

They took him out to dinner afterward, anything to distract his mind. It worked for a little while, until people around them started to recognize him. At first the people were polite, whispering so Liam couldn't really hear them. Just stares and fingers pointing in his direction. Liam just wanted to enjoy his quality time with his family and have a quiet dinner. That was until a group of drunk uni students came into the pub and started to throw insults at him. Liam just sat there with a clenched jaw and took it. His father looked like he was ready to burst, trying to bite his tongue. The insults were childish, made no sense really. The group of boys saying they could've played better than Liam did, how he should've stayed in the junior leagues, wasn't ready for the big times. Still, none of it really got to Liam. That was until they kept talking about Marcus, how they wished Liam was in the accident instead. That was Liam's breaking point. Wishing injury upon someone they didn't even know got to him. His mother kept begging him to remain seated and to just let it pass, ignore them. He couldn't though, he didn't work this hard for mindless drunks to diminish it. 

"You think you could do better?" Liam finally asked the group of lads. His hands were curled into fists, his jaw still clenched tight. "Get out on the pitch and do what I just did?"

"Yea," the leader of the group spat out. He looked about Liam's height, stocky. His face was already red from the copious amount of pints he already downed. 

"Really?" Liam laughed out, a smirk on his face. This was all starting to feel comical. He was arguing with a bunch of drunks. "Let's go then."

"Huh?"

"Come to the stadium with me, show me what you got," Liam explained, still smirking. He could faintly hear his sisters giggling behind him. "I'll call George and see what he thinks, maybe he can place you on the roster."

"Liam, mate," the drunk began, clasping Liam on the shoulder. "Th-this is all just one big misunderstanding. I-I can't do your job."

"Oh really?" Liam asked, an amused look on his face. Maybe this was exactly what he needed after the long day he had. "You were so sure you were better than me a few minutes ago."

"It was just banter," the drunk explained. "Banter between a few friends and their idol."

"Idol?" Liam scoffed. God, these guys were just the scum of the earth. Liam patted the hand that was still in his shoulder. "How about I pay for next round and you lads leave me and my family alone, yeah?"

"Yea," the boy nodded enthusiastically. "Thanks Liam, you're ace, bro."

*****

"But did you see his face? Priceless, bro, priceless."

Louis walked closely behind Zayn as they entered the pub. After the match the two friends grabbed dinner by the stadium before heading to a nearby pub for a few pints. They immediately contacted Niall who was more than willing to join them. As they made their way into the establishment Zayn kept rehashing the story of when Louis walked into Harry, literally. The match was over, the crowd filling out once all the players left the pitch. Louis wanted to wait behind a little, wait until the crowd died down before they left. Zayn knew it was actually just so he knew Harry was in the tunnel and he didn't have a chance to see him. They were making their way to the car park, Louis parking close to the entrance to the stadium. He was walking backwards, talking nonsense to Zayn about something work related. Zayn tried to keep a straight face when he saw Harry come into his view, too preoccupied by his phone to really notice where he was going. He knew it was in his best friend duty to warn Louis but he just didn't feel like it. He just let Louis keep walking backwards, talking enthusiastically. 

That's when they collided, literally. Zayn had to stop himself from doubling over with laughter at their reactions. Harry was horrified, more worried about his phone that crashed to the floor. Louis went pale immediately, this was the first time he'd seen Harry in almost two weeks. Their break up was still fresh on both their minds. They tried to exchange awkward pleasantries, stuttering over every other word. Zayn greeted Harry cordially, telling him that it was nice to see him again. Congratulating him on his first game, not making a fool of himself in front of everyone when he ran on the pitch. A brief conversation was had between the exes as Zayn watched them and all their awkwardness. It was sad really, they both had all the confidence in the world but around each other they were mindless teenagers again. Pathetic. Harry eventually picked up his phone and tried not to look obvious as he jogged to his car in a hurry. Louis sighed as he watched him leave, shaking his head as Zayn threw his arm over his shoulder in support. 

"You're still a shitty friend," Louis reminded him as he found a booth for them to sit in. "Coulda told me that Harry was right behind me."

"And as your best friend," Zayn corrected with a huff, sliding into the booth. "I couldn't do that. You two need to work your own shit out and if the heavens want to intervene, who am I to stop it?"

"Arsehole," Louis grumbled. 

Louis tried to keep up his affronted attitude throughout the night but it quickly faded once he had a pint in his hand. Zayn was right though, he needed to sort his shit out with Harry if they wanted to someday be friends again. Zayn just kept laughing at Louis, his friend was always exaggerating everything. He thought he'd be use to it by now, but sadly he wasn't. It was just one of Louis's many charms it seemed. A half hour later Niall finally showed up, his personality giving the duo the energy they needed. Even after a hard day and a crushing loss at the game, Niall just shrugged it off. He just chalked it up to another loss, it wasn't his first and sadly it wouldn't be his last. He couldn't dwell on it, just learn from it. That was the great thing about Niall, never took anything too serious. Whenever things called for him to be serious, he was, but most times he was calm, cool, and collected. His personality gave the whole group of friends the boost that they needed. Even now, despite whatever was happening between Louis and Harry, Niall didn't take a side. It would be easy for him to choose Harry over Louis but he was going to remain neutral. 

"Niall, my man," Louis called to him drunkenly an hour later, throwing his arm over the blondes shoulder. "Is Harry lonely without me? Does he talk about me? Ask about me at all?"

Niall looked over to Zayn for any sort of help. Zayn just shook his head and gave him a shrug of his shoulders, he was on his own with this one. "Umm, I dunno Lou, honestly. We've both been so busy lately that I really haven't had a chance to properly talk to him. Okay?"

"Fine," Louis gave in with a sigh. "He looked fit today in his tracksuit and doctors bag. Looked like a right professional."

"Not again," Zayn groaned from across the pair. "And before you ask again, no Lou, I will not write a song about Haz."

"Party pooper," Lou pouted and pointed a finger in his friends direction. "But if it was Liam you probably would."

"Lou-"

"Oh Liam," Louis moaned and laughed at his friends horrified face. Drunk or not, he lived for these moments. Moments that he got to tease Zayn so easily, it hardly happened but when it did, it was gold. "You've got a proper crush on the lad, Malik. Admit it."

"Really?" Niall asked, raised eyebrows in interest. "Well, sorry to burst your bubble mate but he's on his way here."

"Niall!" Zayn exclaimed, feeling his face become red either from embarrassment or the pint be was currently nursing. 

Everything become fuzzy for Zayn for the rest of the night. He kept looking at the door, waiting for Liam to make his entrance. He had no idea if Niall was joking or not, he wasn't taking any chances though. Zayn wasn't going to be bombarded by Liam's entrance, he wanted to be more then aware of it. Louis and Niall kept drinking and rambling on across from him, most of it he didn't even pay attention to. He kept slowly sipping at his drink, his eyes still fixed at the pubs entrance. Finally the door swung open and Liam was walking in, he wasn't alone though. A few feet behind him trailed two girls. That caught Zayn's attention immediately, who were these mystery girls? Niall spotted Liam too, waving his hands and shouting to get Liam's attention. Zayn's eyes remained transfixed on Liam as he sauntered over to their table, a smile on his face and the girls still walking right behind him. He greeted the table warmly and slid in the booth, taking the empty seat next to Zayn. The girls waved at the group and moved empty chairs to sit on the end of the small table. 

"You gonna introduce us?" Louis finally asked. 

"Sorry," Liam apologized sheepishly. "Lads, these are my sisters Nicola and Ruth. They came down with my parents for the game."

"Sorry that we couldn't get you a win," Niall told the girls, wincing as he spoke. 

"You know Zayn Malik!" Ruth exclaimed, slapping Liam's arm as she spoke. "What kind of brother are you? Being a superstar down in London and meeting superstars."

"Ruth," Liam hissed, jaw clenched. This was so embarrassing. Not even ten minutes around his friends and his sisters found a way to make him feel like a child again. 

"How did a lot like you get stuck with my little brother as a friend?" Nicola laughed. "Love him to pieces, but, really?"

Zayn felt Liam stiffen next to him, his hand clenched tightly at his side. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what was wrong with Liam. "You okay?"

Liam turned his head, trying his hardest to ignore his sisters teasing beside him and just hone in on Zayn. His calming face, his warm smile. "Y-yea. I will be. Older sisters, you know? It's their job to torment me."

"Come outside with me," Zayn offered. "I could use a smoke."

"And leave my sisters alone?" Liam asked, eyes wide and eyebrows raised. "I-I can't do that."

"Lou, I'm going outside for a smoke and Payno's coming with. Cool?" Zayn asked with a laugh. 

Louis smirked in Zayn's direction, hoping no one else at the table caught on, especially Liam. "Yeah, love hearing stories of Payno here during his youth. Don't worry, Nialler and I can watch the ladies."

Liam slid out the booth, Zayn right behind him. They exited the pub and immediately felt the chill in the air. Even though it was a summer day the temperatures at night had plummeted recently. Zayn lit a cigarette and leaned against the pubs brick wall. Liam just stood in front of him, shuffling his feet against the concrete. It was actually kind of awkward, being alone, just the two of them. Lately every time they were alone it quickly escalated, especially if alcohol was involved. Liam wasn't even in the pub long enough to have a single drink but by the looks of it Zayn had enough for the both of them in his system. It remained silent between the two of them, Zayn smoking his cigarette and just staring off into the nights sky. Liam kept looking at his feet, stealing glances at Zayn whenever he thought he wouldn't get caught. If he listened closely he could faintly hear Louis voice followed by his sisters and Niall's laugh. He guessed that was one upside of the night. They finally locked eyes after Zayn snuffed his cigarette out with his shoe right in front of Liam's eye sight. 

"Wanna get outta here? Come back to mine?" Zayn asked straightforwardly. 

Liam gawked at the question. They were sober, at least Liam was, this usually wasn't how they did things. Zayn looked self assured though, his voice and stance never wavering. "My-my sisters are here."

"Ditch 'em," he suggested with a shrug. "Come on, Leeyum."

"I-I can't," he replied with a sigh. "My folks are waiting for them at the hotel, they're expecting all of us to come back."

"Suit yourself," Zayn told him. "I guess you rather waste your night here instead of me pressing you into my mattress, opening you up slowly until you beg. You look like you beg, do you?"

"Uh, umm."

Zayn tried to stifle his laugh at Liam's lack of words. It was cute, endearing too. "That's what I thought. Let's go Li, your family awaits."

*****

August was slowly coming to an end, the warm weather dwindling and fall was slowly creeping up on everyone. After the first game the Payne's returned to Wolverhampton, promising Liam that they'd hopefully return to London for the game on the 29, Liam's birthday. Once his family was back home Liam felt a little lost, he was excited to see his family again even if it was just for a weekend. It made him feel at peace for the first time since his life was turned upside down. They kept him grounded, made sure his head didn't get too big or wrapped up in all that was around him. A week after they left the team had an away game against Crystal Palace, which ended up in a victory, their first of the season. Oli and Carlos scored the two goals and Liam was ecstatic for them, assisting in both goals. It was just good to have a victory under his belt. Took some of that pressure off of him and the rest of the team. This was the team George expected them to be in the first place. They gave up one goal during the match but no one batted an eye at it, Niall recovered quickly after that, not letting it bother him all that much. 

The match a week after that against Liverpool was just a disaster. Neither team ended up scoring but the playing was just sloppy. No one's head seemed to be in the game at all. Liam couldn't speak for his teammates but he knew his head wasn't fully in the game. He was too distracted by everything around him, he had too much on his mind. When he didn't have the ball at his feet he was looking everywhere else but the game around him. He caught Harry on the sidelines more than once just staring at his phone, waiting for someone, anyone to be injured. Liam's mind began to drift even further after that, wondering how the players on the bench must feel. They too went to each and every practice, warmed up with that team before each game, too. For what though? The hope that George put them in, even if it was for that last five minutes of the match. All these thoughts took up his mind at a time where they shouldn't. Liam knew he was lucky, getting called up and immediately being put on the starting roster, not even a second on the bench. The bench was lined with guys who'd been on the team longer than him, guys who were way better players then he'd ever be. It was one big mind fuck for him. 

The lecture George gave the entire team in the locker room after the Liverpool game was more than expected. He was angry and frustrated, just a week before he was praising everyone and now he was frustrated. All they could do though was sit there and take it, the whole team knew they played horribly. George kept going on and on about how they were going to practice endlessly leading up to their game against Newcastle. He had high hopes for the squad and they had only won one game thus far. Liam had to scoff at that, they had only played three games up until that point. They had one loss, a win, and now a draw. It wasn't what everyone wanted or expected of them but in Liam's opinion it was better than three losses. Liam wasn't stupid though, he knew what was being written about them, about him. Papers were calling Niall rusty, he just needed to get into the groove of things and it'll all work itself out. He wouldn't be that bad if he had offensive support from his teammates. The press adored Niall, his bubbly personality and infectious charm just worked for everyone. Liam also was well aware of what was being written about him. All the hopes and praise he received a month ago was quickly retracted. They all still had nice words to say about him, who he was as a person but his playing skills were trashed. 

Some writers wondered how Liam got the job, who did he pay off to land his spot? He tried to ignore it, pretend it didn't exist. It wasn't all that easy though. When cameras were in your face at a post game press conference, asking Liam directly why he thinks he landed his job. It was a underhanded dig and he always politely smiled at the reporters but never directly answered their question. George or one of his teammates usually began rambling on about something else that diverted everyone's attention away from the awkward moment. Now Liam was standing on the pitch, hours away from playing against Newcastle on his twenty second birthday. No one else was around, none of his teammates or coaches. They weren't set to arrive for another hour. Liam just had come here, to Emirates Stadium, see it when it was at is most quiet, most beautiful. Today was going to be a busy day for him, between the game and his family driving down to London for a proper family outing. The next day, Sunday, the boys were planning a night out, a real bender Harry claimed. Get his mind off of everything and anything that was bothering him. Remind him that despite what the press wrote about him he was still a good person, he was more than just a punching bag for the sport writers in London. 

"You okay Payno?"

Liam shook the thoughts out of his head at the sound of Niall's voice. "What are you doing here already?"

"Same reason you are, probably," he answered with a shrug. "Too much on my mind. This is my safe haven, ya know? Gives me some peace and quiet."

"Yea," Liam agreed with a nod. "There's beauty in the silence. This place will be buzzing in just an hour but right now is when it's the most amazing."

"Barley twenty two and you're already talking like an old man, Payno," Niall laughed and gripped Liam's shoulder. "Happy birthday by the way, lad."

Liam looked over Niall and huffed, a smile on his face. "Thanks."

"Let's beat these Newcastle boys today," he told him confidently. "Get a proper win for your birthday."

Liam was right, less than an hour later the entire stadium was buzzing, the crowd could be heard back in the locker room. Once both teams arrived on the pitch the rafters looked like they were shaking. The feeling the team got when they played at home was indescribable, no matter what happened they had thousands of people on their side. The pure joy and excitement was contagious, nothing could beat ten thousand people screaming and yelling your name, someone constantly on your side. Harry was on the sidelines rearranging all his equipment while Niall jogged over to his goal post. The past few weeks of disappointment and frustration had to be left behind as soon as the whistle blew to start the match. Liam had to forget everything that was said and written about him and his team, today was a new day, a new chance to prove everyone wrong. Everything had seemed to come together quickly for them, the sun was shining high in the afternoon sky, not a single cloud in sight. The cheers were louder and deafening, a vibration running through Liam's veins. It was electrifying, other worldly. 

The first half was typical, both teams playing hard. Shots that were clearly in goal were being blocked on both sides. Liam had to laugh at himself a little, he had never seen Niall work that hard in his life. The sigh of relief that escaped his mouth after each block said it all. The pep talk George gave during half time was the same as always, they had all the potential in the world they just needed to work harder. It was only the fourth game but most of the team could recite the speech by heart, they knew what they had to do. Liam checked his phone quickly as he scarfed down a banana Harry had offered him, random texts and tweets on his phone from people and fans wishing him happy birthday. It lifted his spirits knowing that people outside his realm recognized him. He was a little taken aback by texts from Louis, Eleanor, and even Zayn. The one from Zayn was short and simple, a quick happy birthday and a smiley face emoji, but it lit Liam's insides up. It made him feel that whatever was going on between the two of them wasn't all in his head, wasn't one sided. 

The second half was the same as the first, too many shots on goal that never quite made it. Liam could see the frustration on George's face as well as his teammates. This was supposed to be an easy game, an easy win. Newcastle wasn't playing their best this season thus far so why was it so difficult for them to score? Around the seventy fifth minute Oli went down hard, clutching his left knee as he fell. The player who tripped him intentionally received a yellow card as Harry and Dr. Stewart ran onto the pitch. While Dr. Stewart tended to Oli Harry dashed over to Liam with water and a reassuring word. He needed to calm down and concentrate. It was a lot to take for him, it was his birthday and he knew his entire family was sitting somewhere in the stands. Once Oli was cleared to play again the match resumed and Liam was determined to score a goal. It finally came close to the end of the match. It was the eighty eighth minute, Liam had tunnel vision as he had the goal in his sights. Everyone and everything around him just didn't seem to exist anymore. He knew he was covered on all ends by his teammates, it was only a good four yards distance. He felt weightless as he kicked the ball as watched it fly effortless into the goal. 

The crowd went wild as did the rest of the team. Liam stood there, shocked. He really couldn't comprehend what was going on until he felt Oli, Harv, and Carlos jump on his back. It was his first Premier League goal, something he had been waiting for his entire twenty two years of existence. All the naysayers could write and say whatever they wanted about Liam Payne but now, right at that exact moment he showed them all what he was truly capable of. The rest of the match was blur, Liam and all of Emirates were riding on a euphoric high. His goal was the only one of the match and that's all Liam needed to know once the final whistle blew. Instead of the typical handshakes between teammates after the match the team jumped on and around Liam as a celebration. What a way to spend his birthday. George's speech after the match was short and sweet, a huge grin on his face as he spoke. The whole team was shocked by that, the guys who'd played under him for years had never seen the man smile that wide in their entire career. Liam just took that as a good sign and didn't dare try and interrupt the good mood that everyone was riding high on. 

*****

"I'm getting you laid tonight," Louis declared as he casually sat on Zayn's bed as he watched his friend get ready. 

Zayn looked behind him briefly and rolled his eyes at his friend. "Lou, stop."

"Oh, like you don't want to sleep with Liam," he scoffed at the failed attempt by Zayn. "A handjob and a blowie usually lead to sex in my experience."

"We're having a bros night out for Liam's birthday," Zayn reminded him and ran his hands through his hair one final time. He hummed his approval at his appearance and grabbed his wallet off his dresser. "No sex. That goes for you and Haz too."

Louis snorted as he stood up and passed Zayn his jacket as he shrugged on his own. "I can guarantee that won't be happening at all tonight or anytime in the near future, mate."

The two friends left and made their way to the car Louis had waiting for them, one of the many perks of being widely successful. The rest of August ran just as any other month had for both Louis and Zayn. Zayn kept busy by writing and recording, gearing up for his trip to Los Angeles. His new album was coming along rather quickly, fastest than any other of his albums had before. Louis had gotten him great people to work with like Timbaland, who he was going to meet in Los Angeles. It was going to be Zayn's first time in Los Angeles by himself, he usually had Louis by his side. Louis decided to stay behind, preparing for Eleanor's return from Malta and to figure out their next move with her career. He wasn't afraid to be going alone, it just was going to feel strange. Being in a city he didn't know much about, besides a few venues and recording studios. He was an adult though and a week alone didn't sound like a bad idea in the long run. It was a once in a lifetime experience for Zayn to be working with such amazing producers. 

Louis on the other hand was excited for Zayn, getting to see his best friend off to Los Angeles to work on what was sure to be a monster of a song with such a well sought after artist like Timbaland. It's exactly what he wanted to see Zayn working on, a step in the right direction for him musically. As a manger Louis knew all the benefits that would come from a trip to Los Angeles, all the connections that could and should be made. It bummed him out that he couldn't go, deciding to stay in London instead and work on Eleanor's career and future endeavors. It was always the two of them though, all the time. As soon as Zayn had signed with Louis they were inseparable, Louis traveling with him all over the world. He knew he had to cut those ties eventually, let Zayn be his own person, his own artist. Louis also knew that he had another client, and hopefully future ones as well that depended on him. That was the biggest downside to being a fan of who you managed. Louis was eager to learn everything about both the music and movie/television business. He felt like he'd be a better manager that way. Instead of just smiling and nodding along like he had a clue. 

"You gonna be okay?" Zayn asked Louis as they got out of their chauffeured car that parked in front of the pub. "Seeing Haz and all, this time on purpose."

Louis fixed his hair with obvious trembling fingers, he took a deep breath and hesitantly nodded his head. "Yea. It's Payno's night anyway."

"Okay," Zayn nodded and wrapped a hand around Louis's neck for assurance and comfort, helping bring him back into the moment. "Let's go enjoy the night."

It was still relatively early when the boys arrived, barely past ten. It was easy to maneuver through the crowd and spot Niall and Harry in a brightly lit corner towards the back. Niall's face was already flaming red, a clear indication that he was close to being smashed already. He had a hand around Harry's shoulders, the other one holding a pint as he gestured enthusiastically at nothing. It was clear that he seemed to be going on and on about something that Harry wasn't entirely interested in. Louis tried to calm himself down as he and Zayn approached their friends, this wasn't the first time he'd be seeing Harry since their break up but it still didn't any easier. His mum had told him that the ache he felt would subside, that seeing Harry would no longer feel like a punishment, it'll eventually feel like a privilege. It made no sense to him but he took her word for it, her wise words always ended up making sense in the long wrong. Zayn was his anchor though, never letting him go as they all exchanged pleasantries and awkward smiles. Niall noticed the tension immediately and dragged Harry to the bar to grab everyone drinks. 

It was just the four of them until Liam arrived, making a statement about being fashionably late. The night was now officially allowed to being. Zayn tried to tear his eyes off of Liam all night but it was impossible. When they finally got a booth to sit in Zayn found himself next to Liam, like a magnet drew them together. He wasn't oblivious to Louis's raised eyebrows about what unfolded in front of him. He just clung to Niall's side as Harry dragged a chair over to join the group. There they sat and drank pint after pint, shot after shot, like normal uni kids did. Yes, they did get stares from the other patrons but they were mostly left unbothered. That was a small blessing, they didn't want a simple celebration for a friend's birthday turn into a big to do. They all let Liam go on about the match from the day before and how good he felt, how proud he was of himself. How all his hard work finally felt like it paid off. All the birthdays he had blown off years before just so he could practice and it finally all fell into place and made sense, like there was a reason behind it all. 

"Lads, you're looking at the newest goalkeeper for that Irish national team," Niall announced. "Got the call this morning, I'm heading home on Tuesday."

"Niall, get in!" Louis shouted excitingly and slapped his shoulder with a loud clap. 

"Well, it's backup goalkeeper," he amended with a laugh. "But lads, I get to play for my country, my home."

"Great way to spend your week off," Liam agreed and ruffled up Niall's hair as he laughed at the protest his friend tried to make. 

"What you doing?" Niall asked. 

"Sleeping," Liam laughed. "Maybe head home, see the family."

"Come to Los Angeles with me," Zayn spat out. He looked at the faces around him and realized he had actually just said what he said. That was not supposed to be spoken out loud. Shit. "Umm, I mean if you wanna."

"Zayn you'll be busy," Louis told him through clenched teeth. What the hell was he doing?

"Go Li, you'll love it," Harry encouraged him, pushing his shoulder up against his. "The weather, the beaches. It'll be good for you."

"I-I don't know," Liam stuttered, looking around for something, anything, maybe an answer. "I don't want to impose. Aren't you supposed to be working while you're there?"

"A day or two max," Zayn scoffed, trying his hardest to play it off. Louis was shooting daggers at him from across the table not so subtlety. Harry was smirking around the rim of his class and Niall was trying to play ignorant by humming to himself as he peeled the shells off the peanuts that sat in a bowl in front of them. "Come on Liam, it'll be fun. All expenses paid trip to Los Angeles, once in a lifetime, yeah?"

Liam sighed, his fingers immediately running through his hair. Suddenly the pub felt really hot, everything seemed to be overwhelming. What if he said yes? Would that give anything away. Liam wasn't so sure that Zayn wanted anyone to know about whatever happened between the two of them. But it was Los Angeles, when was he ever going to experience that on his own? 

"So?" Zayn asked. 

"I-I'll go," he finally answered and let out a sigh. Liam didn't realize agreeing to a free vacation would be so stressful.

"Good, great," Zayn told him, a beaming smile on his face. 

*****

Liam was nervous, not because of the flight, even though ten hours seemed a bit much. No. He was nervous to be spending the next six days alongside Zayn, with no one else beside them. Packing for the trip was easy, he didn't own much and what he did own probably wasn't Los Angeles summer weather appropriate. His mum thought he was mental, flying across the Atlantic for ten hours with someone she didn't even know. All she knew about Zayn Malik was what she read about him in the trashy tabloids she read in the local Tesco, which really wasn't that scandalous. His sisters meeting him didn't help either, probably elaborating on the stories they told her. All Liam could focus on was going away, letting his mind relax. He didn't have to worry about anything for the next couple of days, football was going to be the furthest thing from his mind. He promised Niall to watch the two matches Ireland was set to play, even if he didn't get any minutes Liam was going to be a dutiful friend. He just need to concentrate on surviving the next six days with Zayn and maybe, just maybe, figuring out what was going on between them. 

The hotel was exquisite, over the top. It looked like nothing Liam had ever seen before. Of course not, he'd never been to Los Angeles before. Even the hotel he stayed in while in Singapore wasn't this luxurious. The Montage Beverly Hills looked like it belonged somewhere else, somewhere exotic. Driving past Rodeo Drive to get to their hotel Liam took enough pictures to make him look and feel like a tourist, it was actually a little embarrassing. Zayn didn't seem to mind though, resting his head against the glass window and trying to keep himself awake. It was mid afternoon Los Angeles time but it was clear he was still functioning on London time. Everything just seemed so over the top for Liam, the hotel staff going out of their way to be extra courteous to him because he was with Zayn. It made him feel important, almost. Liam didn't expect the same attention as Zayn, he highly doubted anyone in America was going to recognize him. Which was more than fine for him, he was only there to enjoy the time off anyway. 

"I'm gonna pass out," Zayn told him and pointed towards the door behind him. "We'll grab dinner or something, yeah?"

"Y-yeah," Liam replied. 

"You can go whatever you want, Liam," Zayn reminded him. "You're not tied to do anything I'm doing. Go. Explore. I'll text you when I wake up."

"You sure?" Liam asked, a little unsure. They didn't have any set plans during their time in the city, just that Zayn had two days scheduled to record. 

"Go," he urged him gently with a small smile. "Make this city your oyster or some shit like that."

Liam lowly laughed and shook his head. "O-okay. Yea, thanks. So see you tonight for dinner?"

"See you tonight," Zayn agreed with a nod of his head and unlocked his hotel room door. 

Los Angeles was captivating, Liam fell in love instantly. He was too hyped to rest even though his body demanded it. Once he dropped his bags off in his room and called his mum to reassure her he was fine, Liam was off exploring. He didn't go far, afraid of getting lost, but what he did see of Los Angeles he was greatly impressed. He strolled along Rodeo Drive and was captivated by all the shops, everything was so high end. Even though he knew he would never hear the end of it from his family he decided to do some shopping. He wasn't going to walk the streets of one of the most famous places in the world without shopping. He bought both sisters shoes from Jimmy Choo and a bag for his mum from Louis Vuitton. His father was the hardest to shop for, he was a simple man, Liam settled on getting him a watch from some boutique he stumbled upon. After he was shopped out he walked further into the city, people and sight watching. Everything felt like home but just looked differently. The years he spent in London got him use to the crowds, the hustle and bustle of everything being fast paced. It was just refreshing to know that no one recognized him, no one stopping him for a photo or autograph, he could just be anonymous. 

When his phone buzzed in his pocket Liam knew it was Zayn. After shopping for close to two hours he needed to head back to the hotel. Liam got back, dropped off his bags and quickly hopped into the shower. Zayn told him that he wanted a casual dinner in the hotel's restaurant. Liam was nervous as he got dressed, how was he supposed to look? Was he going for casual or maybe a little bit dressy. Was this a date? Did Zayn ask him on a date and he was completely oblivious to it all. That was embarrassing. Taking a deep breath to calm himself Liam threw on a pair of black jeans and a black button up shirt own, looked and seemed casual enough, hopefully. God he was so nervous, why? Liam shook his head at his own reflection in the bathroom mirror, he could do this. It was dinner with a friend, nothing more. He scrubbed his hand over his face before leaving the bathroom to put on his shoes and find some sort of confidence within himself to head downstairs and have a normal dinner with Zayn. It really shouldn't be that difficult of a thing to do. 

"And I told Lou that I just want to be me, you know?" Zayn struggled to ask.

Dinner was not what Liam expected. It was just the two of them alone in the restaurant, Zayn making a brief comment about how he didn't want prying eyes watch him as he ate, that was the first time Liam had seen him throw his celebrity around like that. They quickly ordered a bottle of wine to share while course after course was delivered to them by the chef himself. One bottle turned into two and they were slowly making their way to a third. Conversation was casual, talking about work and back home. Liam was pleasantly surprised to learn about how Zayn and Louis met, a skate park of all places when they were kids. He still couldn't get the exact details on how Louis and Harry met though. Maybe another day. Now Zayn was talking about his music and his transition from his old management to now being represented by Louis. 

"I never fit a mold. Too pop for the R&B crowd but too R&B for the pop charts," Zayn continued, his finger playing with a rim of his wine glass. "I just want to make good music man, honestly."

"You do make good music," Liam told him confidently. "You wouldn't be selling out arenas if you weren't good."

"Why are you a fan?" Zayn asked, staring directly at Liam. It was the first time all night that he looked serious. Everything was breezy throughout the entire dinner until now. "Huh? What sold you?"

"You were honest and open, ever since X Factor even though you were just a kid," Liam reminded him, letting out a laugh. "Your voice is incredible as well. I can't speak for other people but your music helped me, I was all alone in London while my family was up in Wolverhampton and it helped, you know? It helped me get over my homesickness and made me realize I wasn't alone in this world."

"Really?" Zayn gawked and shook his head in disbelief. "No man, my music didn't do that. Especially the first album, that one was complete shit."

"No it wasn't," Liam insisted. He had to mentally scold himself, he was arguing with a drunk Zayn Malik over Zayn Malik's music. Too bizarre. An idea suddenly hit Liam, he unbuttoned his shirt cuff and rolled up his sleeve and thrusted his arm in Zayn's face. "You see that?"

"You've got my lyrics on your skin," he replied in what seemed like amazement, his voice low as he traced the ink on Liam's arm. "But why? You don't know me, or didn't know me at the time."

Liam scoffed at how daft Zayn was acting. It was actually kind of cute and endearing. "I would listen to this song over and over again in my bunk and just felt left out from the other lads. A gay footballer? That's unheard over, never spoken about. I don't know, I just guess your music and this song helped me realize that it was okay to be gay and still love to play football. Like one didn't have to influence the other."

"Wow," Zayn whispered, fingers still tracing the black ink. "I mean thank you, thank you Liam. Honestly."

"Your music is important, it's important to more than just me," Liam assured him. "Don't doubt yourself or your talent."

"Thank you," he repeated sincerely. He slowly removed his hand from Liam and took a large gulp of what was left of his wine, feeling the effects hit him quickly. "You wanna get out of here?"

"I'm not sleeping with you while you're drunk," Liam laughed. "Besides I thought you wanted to press me into a mattress and beg. Can't do that when you're pissed."

"F-fuck Liam," Zayn groaned and bit down on his bottom lip. "You can't say shit like that and expect me to go back up to my room and not wank to thoughts of you."

Liam tried to hide the blush creeping up his neck and cheeks, a small smile on his face. He took a steadying breath to calm his heart that now felt like it was going to jump out of his chest. "Ha-have fun with that."

*****

Los Angeles was always a place Zayn had feared. It always just seemed overwhelming, too much of a lot of things. Too much sun, the beaches always had too sand, the streets were too crowded. It was a bit much to say the least. His first tour when he was an opening act for Miguel took him to Los Angeles for the first time at the ripe old age of eighteen. Everything was new and exciting and he had Louis by his side the entire time. He didn't do much, just the normal things tourists did while they were in the city for all of one day. Took in the Hollywood sign and the stars that lined the walk of fame. Zayn took enough pictures to show his entire family when he got back home. When it was time to record his debut record he spent more time in the city. Never really had a chance to explore it properly though, his time and energy was spent in the studio with producer after producer trying to find the right mix for his music. Los Angeles was always an enigma to Zayn, he never fully understood the allure of the city. Someplace like Chicago or Milwaukee were more his style, big cities but a slower pace of living. 

Now though, now he felt like he could conquer it. He was more confident within himself to be left alone in this city without feeling afraid. Standing in the recording booth with Timbaland watching his every move felt like a dream come true. This man was an icon, a legend. He'd be a part of the music industry for as long as Zayn had be alive. He was willing to work with him, produce a song just for him. It was a bit surreal when Zayn had a minute to step back and soak this whole thing in. This was the man, along with Missy Elliot, who put Aaliyah on the map. He was behind all of the greatest Justin Timberlake's amazing solo music. So this experience was more than a dream come true for Zayn. They ended up in the studio together for most of the day, wanting to get everything perfect so they could just clean everything up the next day. Zayn got back to his hotel room close to midnight and was still buzzing with excitement. He wanted to bother Liam, see what he was up to but decided to leave him alone. They hardly spoke throughout the day, Liam telling him via text that he was going to play tourist while Zayn worked. He couldn't shut his mind off though. He needed to do something. 

"Aww you missed me," Louis cooed when he answered his ringing cell phone. "It's only been two days."

"You're the only one I known who'd be awake at this time," Zayn corrected him. "Seeing that you're a diligent manager and all."

"It's true," he replied with a laugh. "Already heading into the office as we speak."

Zayn moved up a little on his hotel bed, resting comfortably against the headboard. "Yeah, you didn't ask me how my day was."

"Zayn," Louis scoffed and grabbed at his chest in feigned hurt, as if his friend could see him. "I know how your day went. I spoke to Tim a few minutes ago that's why I'm up so bloody early."

"Keeping tabs on me?" He asked with a laugh. "That's sweet Lou, I'm touched, really."

"Bug off," he laughed. "I can't believe you're not going to ask me how my life has been without you."

"Really?" Zayn gawked, flipping aimlessly through the tv channels, searching for something to rot his brain this late at night. Everything on seemed to be infomercials or a constant stream of pointless news. "Fine. How have you been Lou?"

"I slept with Harry last night," he told him casually. 

"W-what!" Zayn explained, dropping the remote on the bed and forgetting whatever was capturing his attention at the time. "You've got to be joking."

"Nope," Louis answered sounding smug even from six thousand miles away. "We decided to be adults and grab dinner last night which led to drinks which led to reminiscing which led to you know."

"Which will lead to you feeling miserable and grouchy," Zayn finished for him. "Lou, that has to be the stupidest thing you've ever done and that's saying something."

"I'll be fine," Louis assured him. "Harry and I will be fine. There wasn't any awkward morning after regret so that's a good start." 

Zayn pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head. Louis was so lucky that this conversation was happening over the phone. "You're completely ridiculous Lou, I don't want to come back home and pick up the pieces of a broken heart again and I don't think El is gonna appreciate doing the same either when she gets home."

"It'll be fine," he repeated, surely to convince himself more than his friend. "Just needed to get it out of my system is all. Completely harmless, mate."

They hung up soon after, Zayn couldn't stay on the phone any longer. If he did he was sure it would lead to him banging his head against a wall. Louis was his best mate, the one person he trusted the most in the world, besides his parents. Sometimes though, sometimes he wondered why he was friends with him in the first place. If Louis wasn't his manager, would they still be friends? If Zayn decided to go to another skate park that day would he end up meeting Louis anyway? He knew he wasn't one who should be passing judgment on someone's relationship when he was just as confused as Louis when it came to Liam. Liam who was probably fast asleep across the hall from him. Liam who made his chest tighten up every time he saw him. How the crinkles by his eyes when he genuinely smiled made Zayn want to write songs about it. It wasn't supposed to be like this though, their relationship was just supposed to be physical. No emotions attached. Neither of them were in a position to be in a relationship anyway. Zayn had to focus on writing and recording and Liam had more than enough on his plate with football. He could do it though, keep his feelings at bay. It didn't look that hard anyway.

The rest of the Los Angeles trip felt like it flew by. Another day in the studio with Timbaland, after two long days of recording Zayn felt confident in the two songs he had. He just hoped the label and Louis liked them enough to let him use them on his upcoming record. These were the types of songs he wanted to record, wanted to represent him as an artist, show off who he really was and not what some record label or management wanted him to be. It was shame that he hardly saw Liam but by the few texts he got from him Zayn knew he was enjoying the city as well. Zayn spent one of his last days there just staying in his room and sleeping, his body still not use to the massive time change or the ridiculous schedule he put himself on. He was in the studio until the early morning before going to sleep early afternoon and waking up just a few hours later to do it all again. On his last day in Los Angeles he and Liam decided to just hang out, just the two of them. They ordered a ridiculous amount of room service for breakfast and geared up to watch the Ireland versus Germany match on whatever ESPN channel was playing it. Liam told Niall he was gonna watch the match so he was. 

"I think I see him," Zayn said pointing to a blonde figure on the screen that kept running up and down the pitch. 

"Looks like him," Liam agreed and squinted to see better. 

"It's a bummer that you didn't make the national team," Zayn casually mentioned as the player introductions were made. "You would've been a great addition for the England team."

Liam looked over at Zayn a little bewildered. That was such an out of the blue statement but he meant so much to him. "Th-thank you for saying that. The team we have is ace though, we're guaranteed to qualify with this lineup."

Zayn shrugged one shoulder and grabbed the remote to lower the volume of the tv as the national anthems began to play. "I mean it Liam, I'm not a huge footie fan but I can notice a star when I see one."

"You don't have to say that," he scoffed and shifted in his seat, the leather on the couch creaking underneath his movements. Everything just seemed way too heightened now, the match on the tv had began but neither of them seemed to even notice. 

"Come here," Zayn called to him, pulling Liam gently by the wrist. 

"Zayn."

"Leeyum," he whined and smirked when all he got in response was an eye roll. "It's okay."

"I-I don't know," Liam said with hesitation but scooted closer to Zayn anyway. "We're not drunk enough for this."

Zayn stopped pulling Liam closer and dropped his hand completely. "Is that what you think? That I only want to be with you when I'm pissed. Liam, that's the furthest thing from the truth."

"Yea?" He asked, looking up at Zayn through his eyelashes. 

"Yea," he confirmed with a flippant laugh. Liam was close enough for Zayn to scratch at the stubble the was growing on his cheeks. "Come here."

Liam nodded, trying to seem as confident as he could be. Everything around him, them, was getting to be too much. Zayn licked his lips before bridging the gap between their bodies. The gasp let out by Liam was quickly swallowed up by Zayn's lips. It was the first time that he actually had a chance to truly kiss Liam, everything up until then had been rushed and with a clouded mind. Now Zayn had the chance to savor this moment, kiss the lips he'd dreamt about once or twice before. Zayn moaned when Liam bit on his bottom lip before kissing him fully again and sucking Zayn's tongue into his mouth, eliciting another moan from Zayn. 

"Fuck," Zayn panted when they parted, coming up for air. He rested his hands on Liam's chest and gave him a cheeky smirk. 

"It's better sober," Liam agreed with a laugh. 

"Yep," Zayn laughed too, pulling Liam back to him by the collar of his shirt. 

*****

Being back home in London made Liam adjust quickly. He had to get use to the change in weather, the gloomy September weather in London was vastly different than Los Angeles. There weren't any palm trees just outside his flat blowing in the wind and basking in the bright sun. There wasn't any room service outside his door every morning, if he wanted a cup of tea he had to make it himself. The holiday was short lived but it was more than worth it, it did its job perfectly. Spending close to a week away with Zayn was something else. It may even have brought them closer together, especially the last day. It was spent lounging on the sofa, the tv on low in the background as they made out like a bunch of teenagers. Just the memory alone made Liam's stomach tighten in fondness. So they didn't watch all of the Ireland match but they saw the end and how it ended up in a victory. If Niall ended up quizzing him about it during training Liam was sure he could lie his way through it. 

Now it was back to reality, back to work. They had a match against Stoke City coming up on Saturday and Niall's birthday was the next day. The fun and games were definitely over. The first day back at training, that Wednesday was filled with stories of what everyone did during their time off. Congratulating those who played for their home countries and won and playful banter between teammates who were opponents just days before. It took a while for everyone to get back into form, maybe the days off weren't as good as they seemed. George seemed pleased at the end of the day though, his usual scowl didn't worsen. His pep talks remained the same, never forgetting to remind the squad how important each and every match was no matter how good they were so far this season. The league was wide open and the top of the table was open for anyone to grab. Liam returned home after each training and went straight to bed exhausted. His body was still trying to get use to the time change. He also secretly hoped that Zayn would either call or text him and he received neither. Maybe he was busy, he did have a record to finish after all and Liam knew that getting on Louis's bad side was something no one wanted. 

Liam had to put all his worries on the back burner as he geared up for the match. Mentally and physically he felt as if he was prepared, as prepared as he could be with almost two weeks off. It felt good to be back at the Emirates, to see and hear the fans. Fans who were now sporting his name on the back of their shirts, fans who contacted him via Twitter lending their support for him and the squad. It was still surreal, to know that he had even the smallest of impact on someone. Running on the pitch for team introductions still was something Liam couldn't get use to, being a part of the first team alongside guys he grew up playing with and some he even admired while he was playing in the junior leagues. Teammates who were now friends, besides Niall, Liam had grown fond of Harv, Oli, and Carlos. As the teams were being introduced Liam saw Harry by the bench and laughed to himself, this team even brought Harry Styles into this life. Him, the kid who couldn't get a single person to attend this sixteenth birthday because all the neighborhood kids thought he was weird. Liam Payne now had his name on backs of shirts and his name and pictures in respected papers and some trashy magazines as well, but that didn't matter. He had made a name for himself. 

"Five clean sheets this season alone!" Louis boasted as they all sat around the table the next afternoon. "Niall Horan is the best keeper in the entire league."

"Stop," Niall groaned but smirked at Louis's compliments. "A lad can get use to this kind of treatment on his birthday."

"Five more matches like that and you'll be the youngest keeper with fifty clean sheets," Liam added, knocking his shoulder into Niall's. 

"I know the rest of the lads are supposed to come but please can we not talk about football anymore tonight?" Harry asked, a tight smile on his face as he tried to be as casual as possible. There was hardly any room to sit all five of them at the table and somehow Harry had ended up smack dab next to Louis. Talk about awkward. "I get it enough at work and now at school they're asking me for your autographs. So please, no football."

"Fine," Louis relented with a shrug. "No more football talk. It's time for birthday shots anyway."

"My liver can't handle hanging out with lot anymore after today," Liam joked, receiving a look of shock from Louis. "You celebrate every birthday like it's our last."

"Because Payno," Louis began with a huff, his hand that wasn't around Harry's waist signaling for the waitress. "It might be. Ever thought of that, hmm?"

Liam knew going out for Niall's birthday would end up being a lot of fun. He was just surprised, still, how he just molded himself into this group of friends. He'd been welcomed with open arms, no questions asked. No one really cared that he was a professional football player because they already knew Niall. Zayn was a internationally known star with Louis being his manger and Harry was just Harry, a uni student with aspirations to become a doctor. It didn't seem normal from the outside looking in but within their tight circle it made complete sense. It become pretty evident around ten o'clock that their group was almost all completely drunk. When Oli and Harv arrived they brought a couple of girls with them so they, along with Niall, were standing by the bar waiting for their next round of drinks. Louis had mysteriously disappeared and Harry was nowhere to be found either. Liam had sworn those two had broken up when they got back from Singapore. Whatever. As long as they were smart about their situation and no one ended up hurt Liam was fine with it. But that left him alone with Zayn, copious amounts of alcohol following through both of their bloodstreams. 

"We should get out of here," Liam yelled to Zayn. The music was turned up loud, vibrating through him and the night rush of patrons were all screaming at the tv and each other. 

"What?" Zayn asked, yelling back. 

Liam rolled his eyes and sighed, moving out of his seat across from Zayn to sit next to him. He smirked and rested his hand on the inside of Zayn's thigh. "I said we should get out of here."

"R-really?" Zayn smirked and raised an eyebrow at Liam's boldness. "Yours or mine?"

"Mine," he answered, biting at his bottom lip trying to fight off the urge to crawl into Zayn's lap at that exact moment. "It's closer."

Liam didn't realize what he intended to happen once he invited Zayn over to his flat. He knew they weren't going to play Scrabble and discuss their core wounds, but having Zayn push him up against his door the moment he closed it was something he didn't know he needed. Zayn's hands were gripping at his hips harshly, purposely trying to leave fingertip bruises. Liam tried to catch his breath as Zayn kissed down his neck, lightly biting at the skin. Feeling bold Liam bucked his hips forward trying desperately to find some kind of connection with Zayn, his cock already throbbing at the possibility of being with Zayn. He could feel the smirk on Zayn's lips as he kissed further down his neck, pushing the collar of his shirt aside to get at more skin. 

"Off," Zayn muttered against his neck pulling at Liam's shirt. 

Liam, with shaky fingers, unbuttoned his shirt and let it fall at his feet. "You too."

Zayn stepped back momentarily to remove his shirt before attaching his lips back to Liam's skin. Liam didn't know how much he wanted to taste the dark ink on Zayn's body until that exact moment. Seeing the moonlight reflect behind him made everything more heightened, made everything more real. Liam gently pushed Zayn off of him which got a whine as a reaction before grabbing his wrist and leading him towards the bedroom. Liam just hoped he cleaned up enough. Last he remembered he still had his gym bag lying at the foot of his bed, his boots thrown about somewhere. When his bedroom door was thrown open Liam get out a little sigh of relief, everything was clean, no one was going to fall over due to his carelessness. 

"Bed," Zayn knocked him out of his thoughts and gently pushed him down. "Strip."

Liam tried to look as seductive as possible as he unbuttoned his jeans and shimmied out of them, toeing them off as well as his shoes and socks. It was really hard to when Zayn kept staring at him intently with his signature smirk on his face, occasionally biting at his bottom lip. It just drove Liam mad, his eyes transfixed on Zayn as he toed off his shoes before unzipping his pants and kicking them off on the direction of where Liam left his clothes. Liam leaned up on his elbows as Zayn crawled up his body to kiss him again. They both groaned as their cocks rubbed against each other, both still covered by their boxers. Zayn took his time learning Liam's body, kissing his mouth, biting his plump bottom lip before traveling further down. Liam tried not to squirm underneath him, trying not to whine out a protest every time Zayn purposely ignored his aching cock. All it earned Liam was a soft chuckle against his skin as Zayn kept kissing and softly biting down his body. 

"Zayn," Liam groaned, throwing his head back in frustration as Zayn kissed and bit the inside of his thighs, pushing his boxers up ever so slightly. "Don't tease."

Zayn looked up from between Liam's legs and tried to look coy, like he didn't know the effect he was having on Liam right now. His mouth red and lips puffy, already looking a right mess. "What do you want?"

Everything was what Liam truly wanted to say but words got stuck in his throat, his tongue feeling foreign and heavy in his mouth, breathing even seemed a little difficult right now. All he could do was softly lift his hips off the mattress hoping Zayn understood him. 

"Words babe. I wanna hear you say it," Zayn said barely above a whisper his teeth gnawing at the meaty flesh of Liam's thigh. 

"Fu-fuck me," he choked out, his face immediately turning red in embarrassment. 

Zayn grinned against Liam's thigh before slowly moving up his body to kiss the patch of hair over where his boxers started. "You got anything?"

"My-my draw," Liam answered and vaguely gestured towards the bedside table. 

Zayn crawled away from Liam, up the bed to retrieve what he needed from the bedside draw. He closed the draw with a bang and place the bottle of lube and a condom next to Liam's leg. This was it, this was the moment everything they were doing was leading to. Zayn crawled back between Liam's legs and just stared down at him. Neither of them making a move or a sound, just their collective breathing echoing in the way too silent room. This was a huge step, massive for both of them. Zayn's chest tightened as he looked down at Liam, some sort of fondness growing inside him. He looked so gorgeous just laying there, his chest rising from his heavy breathing, looking flushed from his cheeks down to all the exposed skin Zayn could see. He kept biting on his bottom lip the more Zayn kept staring at him, not doing anything. Zayn wanted to be gentle with him but also wanted to destroy him, that was the effect Liam Payne had on him. 

"Zayn," Liam whined and bucked his hips up. "Come on."

"So impatient babe," Zayn laughed. He took a deep breath to calm his nerves before hooking his fingers inside Liam's boxers and pulling them down, freeing his aching cock. "So beautiful."

"Such a lyricists," Liam joked, his right hand grabbing a hold of his cock and slowly stroking it, trying to find some relief. His hand was swatted away and replaced by Zayn's. "Fu-fuck." 

"Relax," Zayn instructed him before reaching for the lube by Liam's leg. "Let me make you feel good, yeah?"

"Yea-yea," Liam breathed out, his mind becoming fuzzy from the feeling of Zayn's hand on him and the idea of what was going to happen. 

Zayn removed his hand from Liam with a groan escaping both their lips. He popped open the cap and squeezed some liquid in his hand, pushing Liam flat on his back with his free hand. He watched as Liam let out a deep breath before he rubbed his lubed up finger against Liam's hole which he squirmed at. "Relax."

Liam nodded and let out another breathe of hot air as Zayn continued to tease his hole, just rubbing his finger against it. He sucked in a breath as Zayn finally pushed his finger in, a groan falling out of Zayn and a light hiss from Liam. It had been a long time, too long, since Liam had been in this position. Zayn looked down at Liam his face full of concern but all Liam could do was nod to reassure him that he was okay. Zayn began to slowly fuck him with one finger, letting Liam get use to the feeling. The pain slowly dissipated and Liam began to softly moan at the feeling of Zayn's finger inside him. 

"More," Liam choked out, trying to fuck himself down on Zayn's finger. "Give me more."

"You sure?" Zayn asked and placed a kiss on Liam's stomach, making sure to not touch Liam's leaking cock. 

"Fuck Zayn, please," he begged. 

Zayn smirked as he slowly, insufferably slowly, added another finger. He bit the inside of his cheek at the sound that fell out of Liam's mouth. It was dirtily beautiful, better than any porn he'd ever seen. Liam was beautiful like this, lying flat on his back, Zayn two fingers deep inside him. Liam's chest turned redder, his chest covered in blotches of red and purple from the bruises Zayn purposely tried to leave behind. His hair was a right mess, falling in front of his face. Zayn took his free hand and pressed it against his cock, trying to fight off coming in his pants at the sight in front of him. 

"Oh god," Liam moaned, knocking Zayn out of his thoughts. He was squirming on the bed, cruses and moans falling off his tongue like poetry. He was purposely fucking himself on Zayn's fingers, desperately trying to get himself off. "Sh-shit Zayn."

"Yeah?" Zayn moaned back and kept scissoring his fingers inside Liam trying to find that bundle of nerves that would send him over the edge. He crooked his fingers and knew he found what he was looking for by the noise Liam let out. 

"Fuc-fuck me," Liam said between broken cries. "I'm so close, Zayn, please."

"Fuck," Zayn cursed, he knew he wouldn't last much longer himself just by looking at how wrecked Liam looked. "Yo-you sure?"

"Yes," he hissed out, a silent moan leaving his lips as Zayn rubbed his prostate again. "Zayn, please." 

Zayn withdrew his fingers as Liam whined in protest. He smirked down at him as he removed his own boxers, the cold room feeling heavenly against his achingly hard cock. With a steadying breath Zayn ripped open the condom wrapper, Liam slapped his hands away grabbing for the condom and placing it on for Zayn who just groaned at the sensation of Liam touching him. He closed his eyes and centered himself as he felt Liam's hands back on him, lubing him up with gentle but firm strokes. 

"God," Zayn moaned, placing his hands on Liam's hips and pulling him in closer. "If you need me to stop just let me know."

"Zayn," he whined. "Just fuck me, yeah?"

Liam moved himself closer to Zayn, bending his knees so Zayn could fit in between his hips. He sucked in a breath as he felt Zayn against him as he slowly entered Liam. He tried to think of anything but the slight twinge of pain he felt, he tried to concentrate on how beautiful Zayn looked above him, a slight flush evident on his chest and sweat on his brow messing up his usually perfectly quiffed hair. Zayn kept inching further into Liam, making sure he was okay with every pause of his hips. 

"Li, fuck," Zayn moaned once he was fully in Liam, resting his head on Liam's shoulder. "So good, so tight."

"Move," Liam begged, hooking his legs around Zayn to bring him in closer, in deeper. "It'll stop hurting if you move, babe."

"Shit," he moaned again as he slowly pulled out before fucking into Liam again. "Fuck."

"Such a way with words," Liam laughed, a hiss following soon after. 

The room felt quiet even though the sound of their skin slapping against each other echoed the room, an occasional moan or hiss falling off their tongues as well. Liam was trying to grip onto anything to gain some sort of leverage as he tried to meet Zayn's thrusts, the comforter kept slipping out of his sweaty hands. He grabbed at Zayn's arms which brought Zayn forward and kissed along Liam's jaw before slotting their mouths together. 

"Touch me," Liam breathed into Zayn's mouth. 

Zayn kissed Liam's mouth as he snaked a hand between them, gripping Liam's cock. He felt himself getting close, his thrusts feeling erratic, he wanted Liam to come with him. He fucked up into Liam hard, jostling him up the bed a few inches as he let out a whimper. 

"Close," Liam gasped, hand tight around Zayn's arm. 

"Come for me," Zayn whispered into Liam's ear as he moved his hand in time with his hips. "Come on, Leeyum."

"S-shit," he cried as he felt his orgasm overtake him, spilling over Zayn's hand and in between their stomachs and chests. 

"Fuck," Zayn agreed, bringing his hand once around Liam up to mouth to taste him. "So good."

Liam fell back on the back with a grumble, Zayn was definitely a hazard to his health. He knew Zayn was close, could feel the spastic movement of his hips, with little strength Liam had left he tried to meet Zayn's hips as he thrusted forward. "You're so beautiful like this babe, like you were made to fuck me."

"Yeah," he half heartedly agreed, bending his head down to kiss Liam. He thrusted his hips forward a few more times before he was coming into the condom. Gibberish falling out of his mouth as he bit into Liam's shoulder, sure enough to leave marks there in the morning. Once he was able to compose himself he pulled out with a hiss, disposing of the condom after tying it off. 

"Good?" Liam asked with a smirk as Zayn plopped himself next to him on the bed. 

"Good," Zayn nodded his head and tried to fight off the tiredness behind his eyes. "Sleep."

Liam stared up at his ceiling as he heard Zayn's breath begin to even out beside him. Panic immediately seeping in his thoughts. Did he really just sleep with Zayn Malik? Celebrity aside, he just slept with someone he hardly had a relationship with. The sex was incredible, amazing, Zayn even made sure that Liam was alright throughout the entire time. Now said boy was falling asleep next to him in his bed like they were boyfriends and this wasn't just going to be a one off like all of the other times they shared. He couldn't deal about it right now, he was knackered. Maybe after a good night's sleep and a clear head he'd be able to figure something out. Liam lowly groaned at the realization that he had his dried come on his stomach. That too would be dealt with in the morning. 

*****

Louis was a horrible morning person, it was well known. Sometimes he swore it was written down on his birth certificate next to his name and date of birth. Nothing could ever get him to appreciate the morning, no promise of a hearty breakfast or a stellar view of the rising sun, absolutely nothing. He purposely did a lot of his business with people in Los Angeles so he didn't have to wake up so bloody early and play the role of dutiful manager. School was another issue in of itself, teachers knew to leave Louis alone during his first two classes, it drove the other students crazy. He was given special treatment for being a spoiled brat and it was unfair. That's how Eleanor came into his life during Year Four. She had had enough of Louis and all his special treatment for the last few years and she decided to be class spokeswoman, it also helped that at that time she had a wicked crush on him. Louis was taken aback at her brashness, even at her young age. She was a small girl with a boisterous voice that commanded to be heard so Louis took notice. Their friendship just ended up growing from there, not always conventional but it worked just fine for them. 

When they were eighteen it came as no surprise to Louis that Eleanor was dead set on pursuing a career in acting. She was always cast as the lead on any show the school put on, sometimes convincing Louis to play opposite her. She had seen Zayn make it to the live shows on X Factor and something just clicked inside her, if he could get a taste of fame so could she. While Louis toured the country, the world with Zayn he made as many connections as possible on Eleanor's behalf. It started with local commercials, like most struggling actors, before it grew to walk on appearances on daytime tv shows. It just grew from there, a buzz around the industry about the new up and comer. Louis took her on as his first client, neither of them really knowing what they were really doing. They just went with the flow and hoped it all worked out in the end. It wasn't exactly what a client wanted out of a manger but Eleanor was never going to abandon her best friend, despite all the difficult times. Their relationship was more important than superficial spats over money and time management. 

Now Eleanor was killing it, a bonafide star in both American and British tv and movies. She had her choice at projects all because Louis's due diligence and his determination. Even now with Zayn as another client he never once thought to drop her and her career. He could however do without her banging on his door before the sun even got a chance to properly rise. She was back home in London for not even a full thirty six hours. Louis grunted a good morning to the girl as she made herself comfortable in his kitchen, purposely making as much noise as possible as she set herself to make tea for the both of them. Eleanor was also going to ignore the fact that her manager was hardly dressed except for a loose pair of boxers and obvious bite marks in his chest and neck. She could've sworn that Louis had told her that he and Harry hand ended their little arrangement before she left for Malta. All those questions burning in the back of her mind had to wait until Louis was properly awake, which wouldn't be for another two hours if she was lucky. 

"El," Louis groaned and scratched at the stubble growing on his chin. "Why do you hate me?" 

Eleanor leaned up against the countertop in the kitchen and just smirked over at her friend. "It's how our friendship began, remember? I was brought into your life to purposely torment you."

"Joy," he replied dryly. "I didn't get in until half past three, I'm knackered."

"Not my fault," she countered with a shrug of her shoulders. The tea kettle whistled as Eleanor gathered the cups, saucers, milk, and sugar and placed them in front of Louis who sat at the table, head in his hands. 

Louis peaked at Eleanor through his fingers and tried to muster up enough energy and strength to snarl in her direction. "Make some more noise why don't you?"

"Thanks for asking about my movie shoot Lou, you're such a diligent and helpful manager," she replied sarcastically and took a seat across from him. "The weather was gorgeous and the locals were really hospitable, made a girl feel welcomed."

"Stop," he groaned. 

"What crawled up your ass?" She finally asked, having enough of Louis and his childlike temper tantrum. 

Louis pulled his hands from his face and shook the hair away from his eyes before sighing. "Went out for Ni's birthday last night, went home with Harry and now here we are."

"Harry's here?" Eleanor tried to whisper, shocked. 

"Yes, so keep your voice down," he told her and continued on fixing his cup of tea. He put the cup up to his mouth and placed it back on the table as Eleanor just looked over at him, shaking her head. "Come on El, stop."

"Stop. Stop what?" She asked. 

"You have no right to judge me. It's different this time," he explained and finally took a sip of his drink. 

"I'm not judging. I'm just being a concerned friend is all," she assured him. 

They both sat in silence and drank their tea. Louis knew that Eleanor wanted to go off on him, give him her two cents but was thankful that she didn't say a word. Yes, things between him and Harry were complicated, more complicated now than ever before. He also knew that they both were avoiding the much needed conversation they had to have. It was just easier to ignore the elephant in the room and continue on living life as if nothing had changed. It was unhealthy for both of them, that part was obvious. Louis just hoped that Harry remained asleep in his room while Eleanor was still there, that was another awkward conversation everyone needed to hope didn't happen. She was just being a concerned friend, like she said. 

"Food."

The silence between the friend was quickly ended as Zayn waltzed through the front door with a loud bang and walked directly into the kitchen. 

"Oh hey El," he greeted the girl with a kiss on the cheek before plopping himself down on the only available seat in the kitchen. "Lou."

"Zayn, are you still in last night's clothes?" Louis asked, raising an eyebrow in curiosity. He smirked over to Eleanor who just rolled her eyes. "Did you not go home last night?"

Zayn looked over at Louis with a scowl. "No, I haven't been home yet, Lou."

"That a boy," he replied brightly, clapping Zayn on the back, the echo of his leather jacket filling that room. "Who's the lucky lad or bird, makes no difference to me."

"Liam," he answered, his voice barely above a whisper. He closed his eyes shut tight ready for the onslaught of four letter words Louis was going to throw at him. 

"You slag," Louis responded. Zayn opened his eyes slowly and looked over at his friend, his comment sounded more like a compliment then the judgment his was preparing himself for. "Finally bed the lad, congrats."

"I definitely need new friends," Eleanor mumbled. "Congratulating each other for the stupidest shit."

"What did you do?" Zayn asked. "Why is El mad at you, again?"

Louis narrowed his eyes at Eleanor who did the same in return. Zayn huffed and ran his hand through his hair, this was going to last a while. Both of them too stubborn to back down, very childish. 

"Morning."

Zayn covered his mouth to hide the laugh that was bubbling in his chest. This was all too much, too perfect. The three friends were sitting around the kitchen table ready to judge Zayn about his previous night when lo and behold Harry just casually walked out of Louis room, wearing a pair of Louis joggers that Zayn automatically recognized as ones that use to belong to him. Louis shook his head at the bad luck he just walked into. Eleanor greeted Harry kindly and offered him her seat and a cup of tea. Zayn just kept looking at Louis, begging him to try and judge him about sleeping with Liam when Harry was sitting directly across from him. Harry seemed oblivious to everything around him, as always, making himself a cup of tea and chatting up Eleanor about her movie shoot. Louis tried his hardest to not cry or burst out laughing at the sight in front of him. From the corner of his eye he could see Zayn biting down on his bottom lip trying to stop himself from letting out a hysterical laugh. 

"I'm famished, anyone want breakfast?" Harry asked after interrogating Eleanor about her movie. "I can probably whip up some omelets if anyone is interested."

"It's good to have you back, Haz," Zayn commented, smirking at Louis who raised his middle finger in response, behind Harry's back. "If you can add spinach and cheese to mine that'll be sweet."

"Done," he nodded and turned to face everyone else. "Lou? El? How about you guys."

"Rat poison," Louis muttered under his breath. He felt Harry's gaze on him and forced himself to smile up at the boy, Zayn kicking his shin under the table. "Spinach and cheese sounds fine, love."

*****

Liam was way past exhaustion after he dropped Zayn off at Louis's flat. They both woke up at an ungodly hour, had sex again, before showering and gearing up for their day. Liam had an interview with Arsenal magazine, he was going to be their December cover. The issue was all about the year and who and what made the year memorable, Liam was the obvious choice for the cover the editors had told him. It was all a bit mind boggling for Liam though, he'd barely played for the team all year and now he was getting a cover and an interview. Niall had told him to shut up and accept it, that it was a honor. Liam knew it was but he still was allowed a moment or two of self doubt. The interviewer just wanted to meet somewhere casual, a restaurant, and conduct the interview like they were two old friends catching up on life. Liam could do that, he could do casual even though his heart couldn't stop racing and he still faintly smelt like Zayn's cologne. He could totally be professional. 

The interview was going great, asking Liam how he felt about almost every match he played since joining the first squad. They talked about his life in Wolverhampton, how it felt growing up with one goal in mind, being a professional football player. How he was teased by kids in school because his dream was so farfetched. How Liam was endlessly bullied for thinking he'd be able to achieve his dreams. It was a great interview overall, really cathartic for Liam. That was until the interviewer brought up Marcus and how people were reporting that he got the okay from his doctors and team doctors that he could start training soon. That's when reality smacked Liam in that face. He knew this dream wasn't going to last forever, that his time with the team was coming to an end soon. But to hear it from an outside source panicked him. Of course Marcus was going to get better, of course he was going to start training again. And of course he was going to join the squad again, leaving Liam to hang high and dry. He tried to smile through the rest of the interview as they started to talking about all the friends he made. Talked about Niall, Carlos, Harv, and Oli. Liam even mentioned how he'd grown close to some of the crew too, Harry specifically. 

He couldn't shake the interview once he left though. It was like a shadow, following him everywhere Liam went. Talking to his mum later that day, it still weighed heavy on his mind. Exchanging mindless texts with Zayn, it still was on his mind. It was soon going to be on print for everyone to see in black and white. Marcus Riley was in the process of returning and claiming his rightful spot on the squad. Liam knew he had options, even if they were limited. He could give up playing for good, go back to school and get himself a real career, maybe work in the factory with his dad. Tons of guys gave up football at a young age and were able to live a normal existence afterwards. It didn't seem that hard. Maybe another team would pick him up, sign him to a deal. It didn't even have to be the Premier League, he'd be willing to play for any team that would have him. It would take some getting used to but Liam was willing to do anything within reason to remain playing football. If all else failed Liam knew he'd be able to return home and live with his parents again, they'd receive him with open arms. His mum always cried on the phone about how she hardly ever got to see him anymore. His dad telling him how he missed having him around the house. 

The day's rolled on and the further Liam got from the interview the less it stayed on his mind. He was lucky enough to be distracted by training and matches and his friends. The game against Chelsea was an embarrassment for the whole team. He received a yellow card, his first ever while playing in the league. Both teams got a stern warning after Carlos was sent off after an altercation with a Chelsea player. George was more than furious with all of them after their loss. They all played and acted like a bunch of children, their temper and pride getting the best of them. Liam usually went home to unwind after a match but instead when to Zayn's flat and had a mini Batman movie marathon. It was something to occupy his mind and Zayn was great company. It was still a little hesitant between the two of them, neither of them knowing how to label their relationship just yet. They weren't dating per say but they did try and spend every available moment they had together. Everyone around them were starting to notice it as well. No one said anything, Niall and Harry just exchanging looks at training or before a match when Liam was glued to his phone, a warm, telling smile on his face. 

"Going to see Zayn?" Harry playfully cooed after their match against Manchester United in early October. He was leaning casually against the door of the locker room waiting for Niall to drive them home. 

"Maybe," Liam replied, trying to hide the blush creeping up his cheeks. He focused on tying his shoes and not the roll of Harry's eyes at his answer. "Surprised you're not heading to Lou's."

"Touché," Harry laughed. "My relationship status is just as confusing as yours it seems."

Liam looked up at Harry and shook his head, Harry's statement was the understatement of the year it seemed. He just had to laugh, months ago Liam would've freaked out if anyone even alluded to the fact that he was gay, now he couldn't care less. It was out in the open, well, as out as Liam was comfortable with. Niall, Harry, and Louis knew and that was more than enough for Liam. He didn't have to hide his whatever with Zayn anymore. It seemed more like an ongoing joke between the friends. Harry and Niall batting their eyes every time Liam arrived at the stadium with a fresh bruise by his birthmark. It wasn't a surprise either when Liam got in his car after every match and head to Zayn's house. They two of them would cozy up on the sofa and watch tv or movies and make out like two teenagers. It was fun and harmless. 

"Ready Haz?" Niall asked, knocking Liam out of his thoughts. "Oh Li, I thought you'd be long gone now, heading to Zayn's and all."

"See!" Harry exclaimed with a laugh. 

"Laugh it up, whatever," Liam grumbled, still smiling. "Just jealous that I'm the only one getting laid is all."

"Excuse me?" Harry squeaked out. "You're the only one getting laid?"

Liam waved his hand in Harry's direction, ignoring his comment. "Niall isn't."

"I chose to remain celibate during the season," Niall huffed, lifting his bag higher on his shoulder. "Thank you very much."

"Let's go Romeo," Harry called to Niall, laughing. "I have a paper I need to finish by Monday and I don't want to spend the rest of my weekend wasting away here."

"Good night Li," Niall said to him. "See you bright and early Tuesday morning."

"Looking forward to it," he responded dryly. 

***** 

Meetings and shaking hands was something Zayn never liked about his job. He knew it was necessary, Louis always had to elbow him and remind him to smile each and every time. Networking was not a part of the job that he liked. He wanted the music to do the talking for him. It wasn't like he was shy, it just took him time to warm up to people, that's why he always had Louis at his side. That's why Louis was his manager, he was the biggest people person Zayn knew. Now he was forced to sit in a giant boardroom in the middle of London with men in three piece suits sitting around him. It was a record label meeting, the New York and Los Angeles branches of his label were being conference in as he waited. His latest album was in process of being finalized. The editors and producers putting their finishing touches on some tracks. Zayn himself had a song or two he needed to tweak before he deemed them completely finished. It was the perfectionist in him. The endless back and forth between the heads up of the label on what direction they wanted Zayn to take with his upcoming album release. Penciling in dates on their planners, people still used those, for future meetings. Meetings about artwork, the first single, and even the potential music video. It was exhausting. 

If Zayn was being completely honest with himself he just wanted to head home and see Liam. It had become a little thing between them, whenever they both had free time they'd spend time together. Usually Liam would come over to Zayn's, they'd watch a movie and just play everything by ear. They weren't dating, or at least Zayn didn't think so, but he liked their little arrangement. He didn't have to think around Liam, didn't have to be the person the world thought he was. Zayn didn't have to worry about deadlines or producers or contracts. It was just easy. It started after the match Liam had against Chelsea. He was upset over the outcome, upset over his performance. He just invited himself over and demanded that Zayn distract him. So he did just that by pressing Liam into his mattress and made sure by the end of the night Liam not only forgot about the match but probably forgot his own name, too. Even though everyone around him kept warning him about how bad being with Liam truly was, he refused to listen. Louis secretly loved it even when he didn't openly admit it. He would text Zayn or call him at odd hours and remind him that it was now a perfect time to try and convince Liam to meet with him. Louis was still determined to make Liam a client of his. 

That was one thing that bothered Zayn the most. He just wanted to remain normal with Liam, have a normal relationship for once. Everyone else he'd been within the last few years had ulterior motives. They always wanted something from him and a lot of them succeed. They got their fifteen minutes of fame by selling some fabricated story to the press. Giving inaccurate details of their brief tryst with an internationally known star. That's why Zayn was so apprehensive in the first place, someone always wanted to make a quick buck off of him. Liam was different though, he had no need to sell Zayn out. He was well known in his own right, didn't need Zayn to get his face out there. Now the tables were turned, thanks to Louis. Zayn had even heard Louis try and convince Harry to have Liam talk to him. Why Louis couldn't do it himself was something Zayn couldn't figure out yet. Other than that Zayn loved Liam's company. It felt like for however long they were together the outside world didn't exist, they could be normal twenty two years olds around each other. Pig out on Indian takeaway and endless comic book movies and tv shows from their youth. It was simple and easy, harmless. 

"How's my favorite girl?" Zayn cooed at the baby in his arms. "Uncle Zaynie missed you, I did."

"If the press could see you now," Caroline laughed. "Show the real authentic you to the world."

Zayn rolled his eyes at his stylist. There weren't a lot of people in the industry that Zayn really opened up to. He had Louis and Eleanor but when he met Caroline Watson they just clicked. She was his best friend and mother rolled into one. When she got pregnant with her daughter, Brooklyn, Zayn automatically took on the role of uncle to the little girl. It just seemed effortless. "You're just jealous that this little one has gotten all my attention is all."

"Sure," she replied with an eye roll. "I see she's not the only one who's caught your attention."

"Caroline," he groaned and dangled the toy Brooklyn was playing with in front of her face, watching with pride as she grabbed it out of his hands, cooing at the game. 

"You're paying me extra, out of pocket, to get you a Halloween costume," she reminded him, steaming the black fabric that was hanging in front of her. "Not just one costume though, two costumes. Matching costumes."

"I know what I asked of you," he told her, trying to keep his tone even. Zayn knew she was just teasing him but it did become a bit much after a while. "Are they finished yet?"

"Just need to finish up the jacket and they'll be done," she assured him. "You'll get them in time for Niall's party next week."

Zayn placed Brooklyn on the floor where she began to occupy herself with Zayn's shoelaces. "You know you're my favorite, right?"

"You've been spending too much time with Lou," she laughed and patted his cheek affectionately. "Get outta here superstar before I change my mind."

"I love you," he told her sincerely. He kneeled down to untangle his laces from Brooklyn's grasp before kissing the top of her head. "You too little one."

"Go," Caroline continued to usher him out. 

*****

Halloween was the one time of the year that Liam truly enjoyed. As a kid if someone asked him what his favorite holiday was he'd usually say his birthday, now as he's gotten older it had changed. To know that there was a day out of the entire year dedicated just to celebrate his birth was awesome, surreal even. That quickly changed once Liam realized that no one cared about him or his birthday, besides his family. Now Halloween was his favorite day of the year. The weather was crisper, the leaves on the trees almost fully changed, the smell of pumpkin all over the city. The candy was an added bonus, even when Ruth and Nicola stole all his favorite kind out of his bucket each year. Liam could be someone else for an entire day, no questions asked. When he was six he was a Power Ranger, his favorite costume to date. All the kids at school complimented him and that year he took home more candy than ever before. It just got better the older he got, no one batted an eye when he got excited over the day. It seemed like the older everyone got the more excited they got for the day. 

Over the years he had to curb his excitement over dressing up, too distracted by training camps and matches. He also never had plans either, his teammates getting invited to parties and never thinking to involve Liam in any of their plans. Today though he had a full day, a match early in the morning followed by a party at Niall and Harry's flat later that night. If that wasn't great enough he was going with Zayn, as his date. They spent many late nights on the phone and cuddling in Zayn's bed trying to come up with ideas for their matching costumes. It was cute and made Liam's insides flutter. No one ever wanted to include Liam in any of their plans let alone decide to have matching costumes with him. When he got to Liberty Stadium he was already buzzing after a four hour bus ride. Away matches were always his favorite, the bus was silent so Liam had a chance to relax and hopefully calm his ever present nerves before each match. Niall always sat next to him, usually falling asleep before the bus even pulled out of the lot. The simple things were comfortable for him, assuring. 

The match was one of Liam's personal best he thought. He scored the first goal of the match and assisted in the other two to secure an easy win against Swansea City. The entire team was itching to head back to London after the match. Liam had never seen the entire squad shower and ready themselves that fast in his entire football career. The buzz in the air on the bus was palpable, everyone shouting to each other. George just shook his head and laughed at this young, rowdy squad. Liam knew that once he got back to London he hardly had any time to himself before he needed to be at Zayn's. Half hour into the bus journey everyone was either asleep or keeping to themselves quietly. Like always Niall was the first one asleep, his snoring oddly welcoming to Liam. He knew that once the bus pulled up into the car park Niall and Harry were leaving as fast as they could to prepare for their party. That's all Harry could speak about when he ran onto the pitch to tend to a teammates head injury. The injury wasn't anything major, but Harry took that as an opportunity to run onto the pitch and briefly speak to Liam while Dr. Stewart did most of the work. 

"Two hours Payno!" Niall reminded him as he took off with Harry towards his car. "Epic, smashing banger happening tonight."

Liam had been to Niall and Harry's flat only once. Even though he got drunk during that time he distinctly remembered what happened that night. He snuck off with Zayn and ended up in Harry's room. Louis wanted to throw a massive bender to get over Harry. Liam just had to laugh at how everything had changed in such a short period of time. Harry and Niall were now hosting a party where Louis was a welcomed guest and Liam was going to the party as Zayn's date. It was a bit surreal. He showed up at Zayn's home where he finally met the infamous Caroline, she thrusted his costume into Liam's hands without saying a word but her smirk said it all. She didn't look as intimidating as Zayn had described her. It was cute to watch the two of them playfully interact as Liam hopped around Zayn's home with one shoe on, desperately trying to find the other one. Once he was finally situated he fixed the wig on his head and looked over at Zayn and Caroline for affirmation. 

Zayn was dressed up in his costume as well and with Caroline milling about making final adjustments on both their costumes she declared them done. Luckily for the makeup on Liam's face because he couldn't stop blushing at the look Zayn kept giving him. He looked amazed, proud even that Liam had agreed to go with him to the party. Caroline took on the roll of doting mother and took countless pictures on all their phones. It kind of felt like prom, all the pictures and praises and well wishes as they left. Zayn hired a chauffeured car to take them to Harry and Niall's seeing he suspected they'd both be too drunk to drive themselves home later that night. Liam was just amazed that he wasn't exhausted seeing that he had a pretty long day and even longer night ahead of him. The front door was vibrating by the time they arrived, the music could be heard perfectly in the hallway. Of course they were blasting a Zayn Malik track that made both boys laugh. Louis's voice could be heard over the music though, no shock in that. 

"It's about time," Louis huffed when he spotted Zayn and Liam walking in. "I was about to call Scotland Yard looking for you two."

"Don't get your knickers in a bunch Tommo," Zayn replied with an eye roll. "We were with Caroline and she kept showing us pictures of Brooklyn in her Elsa costume. Can't say no to my goddaughter, can I?"

Louis scowled at Zayn, eyebrows bunched together. "Fine. Now hurry up and grab a drink, you've already missed Niall doing a keg stand."

Liam was enjoying the low key atmosphere of the party, not a lot of people to mingle with. Harry and Louis were basically attached at the hip in their matching costumes, they went as two peas in a pod. That was kind of appropriate the more Liam thought about it. It wasn't the most creative costume seeing all they did was dress head to toe in matching green outfits and call themselves peas but it was the effort that counted. Niall was dressed like David Beckham and his date, Charlotte, was doing her best Posh Spice impersonation which was spot on. Some of Harry's uni friends stopped by and luckily weren't too impressed with Liam, Niall, and Zayn all being in the same place together. That was a small victory for Liam he guessed, no one caring who he was. Zayn hardly left his side though, saying their costumes wouldn't be complete without the other one. He wasn't one to brag but Liam knew that his Joker to Zayn's Batman was the crowd favorite. So maybe that had help from a professional stylist but it was the thought behind the costumes that really counted. 

"Liam Payne, it's so good to see you again."

Liam smiled wide at Eleanor as the two of them were standing in the kitchen pouring themselves another drink. "Hey El, long time no see. How are you? How was Malta?"

"It was good," she replied with a nod, adjusting the cat ears that sat atop her head. "Probably the best shoot I've ever been a part of. Can't wait for the world to see it."

"I'm excited," Liam told her sincerely. 

"So," she began with a sigh, shuffling her weight from one foot to the other. "You and Zayn, huh? How are things going with that?"

"El," he groaned, still smiling at the girl. He didn't have a concrete answer to give her. There wasn't really a label attached to what they were doing, to who they were. "It-it's good. I like having him around and I assume he feels the same way. It's all just fun I guess."

"Be careful," Eleanor warned him, lightly patting his cheek and hoping none of his makeup got on her. "You're both adults but Zayn is like a little brother to me. I don't want to see him hurt, you either for that matter."

"It'll be fine," Liam promised her, a little weary. "It'll be better if people didn't warn us every step we took, though."

Eleanor nodded her head, trying her best to show Liam that she understood. "We care. I can't speak for anyone else but I know I'm coming from a place of love."

*****

The end of the year always caused anxiety for Louis. All the deadlines he had to meet were vastly approaching. He didn't slack off during the rest of the year, it's just that he knew that he enough time ahead of him to finish his work. On top of his workload Louis was also planning his epic twenty fourth birthday party. Every year he tried to top the party from the year before, he didn't know why he just felt the need to do it. His friends always offered to help year after year but Louis flat out refused. He wanted to accomplish something himself and he chose his birthday party as that accomplishment. Seeing he had tons of paperwork to finalize that saw Louis in his office more than he wanted to be. Eleanor's movie was in the editing stages, slated to be released early spring. Zayn's album was finally finished, the first single already being released. The label, along with Louis and Zayn, agreed to release one of the songs produced by Timbaland as the first single. The critics and fans both seemed to like it so that was always positive. Album release time was always filled with stress and anxiety for everyone involved. It involved a lot of behind the scenes work from a lot of different people.

All this work meant Louis didn't have a lot of time for his personal life, that's why he needed to throw himself a party. Work was a great distraction but it also cramped his life. He and Harry were slowly but surely working out their complicated relationship. Neither of them wanted to label what they were but they both knew that their relationship was different. They both were different from who they were over the summer. Louis wasn't going to hide what he felt from Harry anymore and Harry really didn't seem to mind. Louis may have pretend to be asleep as Harry whispered in his ear his true feelings. He knew that Zayn and Eleanor were still apprehensive to everything but openly supported Louis, like the good friends and clients they were. Speaking of clients, Louis knew his window of opportunity with Liam was dwindling fast. The midway point to the season was fast approaching and he still hasn't had a chance to sit down and talk business with Liam. Zayn would quickly change the topic of conversation every time Louis spoke about the issue, refusing to get in the middle of it all. It was widely written about, Marcus returning and taking his spot back on the roster. 

Louis stood on stage at the club he rented out for his party and nodded approvingly at what he saw. Everything was running smoothly, for now. The people he hired strictly for this event were milling about, putting final touches on the decorations and whatever else that needed to be done. The guests were set to arrive within an hour, the DJ setting up his equipment beside where Louis stood. The party was already being written about, being called the party of the year. The celebrities that were supposed to attend were staples in every newspaper and magazines all over England. This party was from Louis's own creation and he'd be damned if everything didn't run smoothly, or close to perfect as possible. Harry was scheduled to arrive soon with Niall in tow. Zayn and Liam were going to pick up Eleanor before heading over. Liam was a little skeptical attending alone with Zayn so they volunteered to pick up Eleanor. Liam knew all the photographers were going to be outside waiting for everyone's arrival so he wanted to play it safe with Eleanor being an obvious third wheel to his date night with Zayn. 

"So I told him that's going to be too much paperwork," Louis finished his story. 

Three hours into his party and Louis already had a crowd around him. His arm was thrown over Harry's shoulder, his drink sloshing down his wrist and on the floor. Harry looked like he was hanging on every word Louis said like it was gospel, or maybe the alcohol was dulling his intellect. Zayn and Liam were a part of the crowd as well, trying to follow Louis story about something business related. Niall nodded along, trying to show Louis at least some sort of support. No one really could follow a drunk Louis telling a rather boring story. 

"Speaking of paperwork," Louis continued and shifted his view to Zayn. "Why didn't you get me a meeting with your boy?"

"Lou," Zayn groaned. "How many times do I have to tell you that I'm not doing your dirty work?"

"What is he talking about?" Liam asked, nudging Zayn's shoulder with his own, his fingers curling around Zayn's wrist momentarily. 

"Ignore him," Zayn scoffed and shook his head. "Lou's just being Lou."

"No I'm not!" Louis protested. "Remember when I told you to fuck Payno here so he could sign with me?"

"Louis," Harry quickly scolded him, slapping his stomach. "You did not!"

"Yeah, it was right after you told me you got him off at El's party," Louis continued with a nod. "In the loo, right?"

"What is he talking about?" Liam looked directly at Zayn, suddenly feeling way too sober. "Tell me it's the alcohol talking for him."

"O-of course," Zayn assured him, sounding uneasy. He could feel the bile forming in his throat, the heaviness in his chest as Louis spoke, the panic running through his mind. "You should know not to listen to Tommo." 

"Zayn," Niall clicked his tongue. "Not cool bro."

"I didn't agree to anything!" Zayn exclaimed, starting directly at Liam. "Babe, you've got to believe me, please."

Liam looked at everyone around him, all of them having different looks on their faces. Zayn look horrified and maybe it was the alcohol in Liam's veins but that just felt wrong to him. Everything felt off. "I-I gotta go."

"Li-Liam!" Zayn called after him as he watched him walk through the crowd and towards the exit. "Liam!"

"Let him go," Niall told him, pulling him back by the arm. "Let him sleep it off."

Zayn nodded at Niall, trying to reassure himself. "You're incredible Lou, honestly."

"What did I do?" He asked. 

"I need a drink," Zayn concluded with a shake of his head.

"Zayn, it'll be okay," Harry assured him. "Payno knows how Lou is. I promise this will all sort itself out by morning."

"Yea, hopefully," he replied with a shrug of his shoulders. 

*****

Liam woke up the next morning dreading the day. It was Christmas and it was another year he wasn't going to be able to spend it with his family. When he was still in the junior leagues Liam was able to head back home and spend the holiday at home. For the last two years he had to remain in London, either for a match or to train. Today was no exception. They had the big Boxing Day match the next day and George insisted that they all get at least some training in, despite the holiday. A lot of the guys were lucky to have their friends and family in London with them so they didn't spend the holiday alone. They had a short two hour drive to Southampton the next afternoon and George wanted to make absolutely sure that they were ready. Before heading to the training ground Liam called home and kept assuring his mum that he was fine and that she didn't have to keep on worrying about him. He exchanged pleasantries with his sisters and father before hanging up and getting ready for the day ahead of him. Was Liam purposely ignoring the events of the night before? You bet he was. 

He got home around half past two and went straight to bed. His blood was boiling and he felt like he was going to be sick. He wanted wholeheartedly to believe that whatever Louis was speaking about was wrong. Zayn liked him, wanted to be with him. A sneaking suspicion kept creeping up on Liam though, he knew it was all too good to be true. Of course Zayn had an ulterior motive. Why would anyone want to be with him without some sort of underlying intention. Obviously Zayn would chose his best friend over Liam, a complete stranger to him. He just had to forget that though, focus on what was ahead of him. He couldn't have a relationship that never really mattered distract him from the task at hand. He arrived at the training ground and said his hellos to his fellow teammates before changing. As he laced up his boots, actively ignoring the way Niall kept staring at him from across the room, George called him into his office once he was done. The usual catcalls never came and that panicked Liam, being called into the office by your boss was never a good thing. 

"Payne, can I be frank with you?" George asked mere seconds after Liam stepped foot in his office. 

Liam took a seat across from his boss and hesitatingly nodded. "Yeah."

"We're letting you go," he announced casually, like he was reading off his grocery list. "You should've known this would be coming eventually."

"Yeah," Liam replied, still nodding his head. This was a lot to take in right now for him, he didn't know how to react. Everything was seeming to move in slow motion around him, everything a bit blurry. 

"This doesn't mean your football career is over," George reminded him gently. "Just that your time at Arsenal has come to an end. The trading deadline isn't until the end of January so you have a full month to look forward to."

"Or a full month of nothing," Liam grumbled. "I'm glad you're getting Marcus back, though. He's a good lad from what I can see. Ace player for the squad, better midfielder than I am."

"Payne," he began with a sigh and shuffled forward in his chair. "You're a damn good player. Part of the reason why we're on top of the table right now. Don't doubt your talents, son."

Liam stood up, deciding to end this little meeting quickly as possible. He didn't need a pep talk, he needed to get out of the office and on the training pitch. "Thank for the opportunity, George. I appreciate it." 

The training session was the toughest one for Liam. He wanted to just pretend to train, not really seeing a good reason why anymore. He also knew that he had two matches left to play with the team. He was to still be a member of the team until their last game of the year, which was the 28th. A match that was at home against Bournemouth. Niall was at the opposite end of the training pitch when Liam arrived, doing his own drills with the other goaltenders. He tried to ignore the looks his teammates were giving him as he stretched and jogged in place to get his blood flowing. He wasn't going to let anything distract him, hopefully. Obviously it was easier said than done. Oli, Harv, and Carlos kept crowding around him during training trying to pry any little information from him. Liam would just try to give them reassuring smiles as he looked over at Marcus who looked like he was basking in the glory of his return. Liam couldn't fault him though, Marcus was back to his rightful place, where he belonged way before Liam was even a thought. 

After training Liam didn't even shower, he just grabbed his bag from his locker and took off. He knew the longer he stayed around the more chances people would have to ask him questions. He hardly even glanced at his phone since he got home from Louis's party the night before. After he spoke to his parents he turned the ringer on his phone off, texts and calls endlessly setting the ringer off. Zayn had probably text him close to a dozen times, every message an apology. Liam really didn't know what he was sorry for but he didn't want to hear it, or read it in this case. Either way Liam was not up for it. He got home and tossed his bag on the floor by the front door, not even close to caring anymore at this point. He grabbed a beer from the refrigerator and sat on his sofa, just staring blankly ahead. Thoughts whirling endlessly in his mind. What was he supposed to do now? If he didn't get picked up by another squad he was done. His career he worked so hard for, a career he'd work towards for most of his life was now gone within a blink of an eye. 

He could go back to Wolverhampton and live with his parents again, they'd both be thrilled. They were feeling a bit lonely after both his sisters moved out about a year or so ago. His mum would take care of him, be at his beck and call, make up for the all years when he was away. His dad would take him to all his local haunts, show off his son to all his friends. His son the big time football star for all of four months. Liam knew that Wolverhampton would buzz with excitement at his return, but there would be also be naysayers. He'd get that wherever he went though, that was just a part of life. Maybe even get a job at his father's factory, earn his keep around the house. Everything was just surreal. His face was on the cover of magazines and newspapers and now within mere days Liam Payne would just be a name no one would remember or even care to repeat. This was the life he decided to sign up for, he just had to deal with the consequences. 

*****

"So the album release is the fifteenth and we'll have the party that night. Sounds good?"

Zayn looked up once he felt Louis's eyes burning a hole into him. "Hmm, what you say Lou?"

"You haven't listened to a word I've said all morning," Louis sighed. "Where's your head at, Malik?"

"I'm paying attention," Zayn replied, looking back down at his phone. 

Louis sighed again and tried to peak over his desk at Zayn's phone. "What's so important that you can't even have a meeting with me without distractions?"

"Liam," he answered simply. "I've tried texting and calling him at least a hundred times since your party and he won't answer me."

"He's fine," Louis assured him and sat back in his leather seat. "Haz and Niall both have seen him. They lost pretty hard yesterday or did you not see the match."

"Tomorrow's his last match for the team," Zayn said and put his phone on the desk, keeping a close eye on it as he looked up at Louis. "You messed up Lou, you know that right?"

Louis let out a heavy breath as he nodded his head. The memories of his party replaying in his mind on constant loop. "Haz kindly reminds me each and every day of it. Look Zayn, I feel really shitty about what I said. I'm sorry, I really am."

"You don't need to apologize to me," he scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Talk to Liam."

"You really think he's gonna talk to me?" Louis laughed. "He's not just ignoring you. He's icing out Niall and Harry, too. Comes to the stadium, plays the match and leaves before anyone can talk to him."

Zayn scrubbed at his face harshly, trying to feel something, anything. "I fucked up." 

Ever since Zayn watched Liam leave Louis's party he hadn't been focusing. It was now crunch time, he had a lot things on his plate at the moment. The single was doing well on the charts, looking like it would become his fourth number one song in the UK as well as America. It was a big, huge accomplishment in his career, but Zayn couldn't really focus on that. All Christmas Day while he listened to Harry and Louis coo over each other and their presents for each other Zayn kept texting Liam hoping he'd answer. That night was when he got the news from Niall, Liam was officially dropped from the team. His contract would be terminated after the match on the twenty eighth. That's when Zayn became desperate, texts became phone calls which were too unanswered. It was slowly driving him crazy, not knowing what to do to help Liam. Giving him space was not an option, Liam didn't need to be alone, didn't need to deal with this news by himself. Everyone was telling him to let him be, give him space to sort himself out. It was easier said than done, obviously. He watched the match on Boxing Day, saw the look on Liam's face as he played, the utter despair every time the camera panned to him. 

This was the most important time in Zayn's life, promo time ramping up. He was doing interview after interview, photo shoots after photo shoots, but all he could think about was how badly he messed up. It would be easier to just blame it all on Louis and call it a day but it was never that easy. Zayn kept himself so guarded around Liam that he could see why Liam got so upset when the shit hit the fan. Instead of being honest up front with Liam, Zayn let the charade continue until it blew up in his face. All the months of Louis teasing finally came to a head and blew up in all their faces. Now all Zayn could think about was how Liam now assumed how he just wanted to be with him for Louis's benefit. That was further than the truth, though. The was the opposite of what Zayn believed. Nothing was ever normal between the two of them, that was pretty evident since their first meeting at Louis's dinner party. Liam Payne had somehow carved himself in Zayn's life and he was fine with that, welcomed it even. 

He kept on smiling though, showing the world that they didn't have to worry about him. Zayn was good at keeping the media out of his personal life and he was going to continue to do that. Even though every time he was looking at his phone he was hoping and praying Liam would contact him. Caroline would try and add her two cents and give motherly advice but Zayn wouldn't have it. He messed up and he only had to fix it. Work was a good distraction but it was when he was home alone that it really hit him. Laying on the couch watching tv or movies when insomnia hit wasn't the same. Liam wasn't next to him to cuddle or talk aimlessly about his day. Their relationship wasn't a conventional one, that was pretty obvious to everyone, but it meant something to Zayn. He always looked forward to spending his nights in with Liam, learning about him in the most random ways. An advertisement on tv sparking a conversation about anything and everything. Stories about how they grew up and what they dreamed of as kids, how they both got lucky to do what they always wanted to do. It made Zayn's chest ache something fierce with want and need now that he no longer had that in his life. 

*****

"You okay, Payno?"

Liam jumped a little at the voice, Niall's, and just smiled weakly over at him. This was it, today was his last match. Every fear he ever had about his career was coming true today. Liam had to laugh at himself some, he always thought his career would end with either a retirement or a massive injury. Never once did he think he'd get dropped from a team. News broke right away about him being dropped and the press was having a field day with it. The same press that praised him and raised him to close to God like status only months ago. Liam just had to replay his mothers words as he changed and warmed up for the match. That morning she had called him and reminded him that he'd get past this like he got past every other obstacle in his life. He was allowed to be hurt now but never to dwell on that pain or else it would consume him and that's not how Karen Payne raised her children. He could faintly see people in the crowd wearing his jersey and pointing at him to show him that they were wearing it, showing that they supported him. It warmed his heart, people still cared no matter what the press said. He still had people on his side. 

The match went by in a blur for Liam. Liam felt like he blinked and the whole thing was over without him ever getting a chance to savor it. It was a typical match from what he recalled, the first half remaining scoreless. The second half began and that's when things started to really click for them all. Everything around him was heightened, more intense. He could hear the gossip from the other team, everyone around the league knew it was his last match. Whether they cared or not wasn't Liam's concern. During the fiftieth minute Harv scored pulling Arsenal up a goal. Three minutes later Liam was tackled and fell hard to the ground. He clutched the back of his head and laughed. On his last match probably ever, he gets injured. Oli and Carlos stood by him as Harry along with Dr. Stewart ran to his aide. The doctor determined it not be a major injury and ran off the pitch so Harry could finish patching him up with a wet towel to clean the minor cut that occurred. Liam wasn't stupid despite what everyone around him seemed to think, he saw the way Harry lingered around him longer than necessary. Searching his eyes and face for any sort of emotion, any sort of idea of what was running through Liam's mind. He wouldn't budge though. It was just easier to let Harry and Niall go, too. Drop them before it got too difficult to say their goodbyes, before anyone got hurt. 

Twenty minutes after his injury and mere minutes left in the match Liam scored a goal. He was wide open, Harv helping with the assist. The celebration in the stadium and on the pitch wasn't one Liam expected. The yells were deafening, echoing in his ears even hours later. He could even see George celebrating from where he stood, his goal really didn't matter, they were going to win with or without it. It did feel good though, to have one last accomplishment. The final whistle blew and that was it, Liam was done. He applauded the crowd like he did after every match and slowly began to walk off the pitch. All the other teammates were congratulating each other and shaking hands with the opposing team but not Liam. A small part of him knew he was acting like a petulant child but he knew deep down that he had every right to act as such. The press was already getting lined up for after any match comments from anyone but Liam knew that a lot of them were going to be desperate for his words. He smiled weakly at them before heading into the locker room to shower and change. He didn't want to give them a comment that he knew would follow him the rest of his life. 

"The man of the match lads," Carlos boasted as he along with the rest of the team entered the room. "Payno with the last minute goal like always."

"Horan grabbing another clean sheet," Oli added. "Great way to end the year."

"Great way to end a career," Liam scoffed, throwing the contents of his locker in his bag. His extra pair of boots, jerseys he'll no longer get to wear. 

"Oh Payne is looking for a pity party," Harv laughed and clapped Liam on the back. "Well, you're not getting one here, not from us at least."

Liam shut his locker with a loud bang and sighed, leaning his head against the cold metal. "No one's asking for a pity party boys, just want to clean up my shit and leave. Okay?"

"Liam," Niall called to him and shooed the other boys away with a single glare their way. "You can be a dick to the other lads but not me."

"And why's that?" He asked, pushing himself away from the locker. He turned around, his back resting against the metal. He watched carefully as his other teammates tried to look occupied, like they weren't trying to listen closely to the conversation. "Why do you get special treatment?"

"I thought we were mates," Niall said, a little affronted. "You've pushed me and Haz away and don't even get me started on what you're doing to Zayn."

"What I'm doing to Zayn!" Liam exclaimed, laughing. "That's rich coming from you Ni."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Niall asked, eyebrows raised. 

"Boys," Harry interrupted, pushing the strap of his bag up his shoulder further. "Not here."

Liam looked between both Harry and Niall who looked like they were creating a barrier in front of him. He just had to scoff at the sight. "How about not at all, yeah? Let me just leave."

"Let's go out," Harry suggested, bouncing slightly on his heels. "Celebrate the end of the year a little early, just us boys."

"No," Liam was quick to respond. "I have to pack up my flat. My parents are coming tomorrow to help me move."

"Move?" Niall asked, his voice raised in shock. He shook his head like he couldn't process what Liam had just dropped on them. "Like back to Wolverhampton?"

"Back to Wolverhampton," he nodded. "There's nothing keeping me here in London anymore. I start my new job in my dad's factory on Monday."

"Liam," Harry whispered, reaching forward to try and grab his arm. 

"Life goes on," he shrugged half heartedly. "Excuse me gents, I need to leave."

*****

Louis felt like shit. He didn't need the constant reminder every time he saw Harry or drove past what once was Liam's flat. A lot of what was happening was his fault, he could admit that, sort of. Zayn was miserable but tried to ignore it by preoccupying himself with work, which was good for Louis. The album was set to be released in less than two weeks and it was time that they all hunkered down and got serious. Maybe Liam getting cut from the squad and heading back home was a good thing in the long run for everyone. Louis didn't know how but he was working on it. Zayn wasn't preoccupied on his little school boy crush anymore, so that was a small plus. Okay so Zayn wasn't necessarily talking to Louis in a friendly capacity but they were still talking. He just needed time, that's what Louis kept telling himself. Zayn just needed time to sort out all of his emotions before they could get back to what they use to be. He'd wait, he'd always wait for Zayn. A friendship like theirs wasn't going to be thrown away over some boy. 

Louis was trying to be the diligent manger that Zayn needed, getting everything sorted out for his album release party. Invitations were being sent out, some the old fashion way via the post, while others were sent out via text messages and emails. Most of the people invited were close friends, like Harry, Niall, and Eleanor. The others invited were old, crusty business people. Some from the label, and a few people from the press. Louis and Zayn both wanted the affair to be low key but they also knew that the press needed to be there, needed to report on the album and the atmosphere. Luckily they had the control of who attended, what journalists got in. It was a give and take all parties were fine with. It just bummed Louis out that he had to do it all alone, without any help from Zayn. He text Louis his guest list and that was it. So yeah, Zayn was still upset with him over how everything with Liam went down. Louis knew he needed to fix the situation and soon, he didn't need Zayn's mind to be elsewhere during this curtail time of promotion. 

Zayn's PR team, along with Louis, set up a tight schedule for Zayn. He did some major promotion in the U.K., appearing on The Graham Norton show alongside the likes of Will Smith and Ryan Reynolds. That put a small smile on Zayn's face when he was allowed to be publicly nerdy with two comic book movie stars. He also did his first ever live lounge on BBC Radio 1, a dream of Zayn's since he was a kid. After the New Year's celebrations he went to both New York and Los Angeles to do promo there, appearing on the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon and the Late Late show with James Corden. It was all very smart promotion, Louis knew that the music itself could only take Zayn's upcoming release so far. He needed to pound the pavement and get out there, show his face to the masses. Even if there was a riff in their relationship Louis was still Zayn's manager, still knew what was best for his career. While Zayn was preoccupied with his job Louis still was trying to figure out how to rectify their situation. How to fix the first problem they've ever had in their friendship. 

"Marsha!"

A petite redhead shuffled into Louis's office, frazzled by the sudden calling of her name. "Yes Mr. Tomlinson?"

Louis scoffed at the professionalism, but appreciated it as well. "Can I get an updated RSVP list to Zayn's party, please?"

Marsha scurried off in a slight hurry, heading back out Louis's office and into the pit. The pit as Louis called it was where all the few employees he had worked in cubicles. It was roughly six or seven people that handled the day to day activities of the company alongside Zayn and Eleanor's career. A lot of them were just uni kids looking to make some money or earn credit for their classes. "He-here you go sir."

"Thank you," he replied and took the paper that was offered to him, scanning the names on the list. "Marsha, why hasn't Eleanor responded yet?"

"I don't know," she replied, her voice shaking slightly as she spoke. "I can get Sophia on the phone for you if you like, see if she knows why we haven't received a response yet."

Louis rolled his eyes and waved his hand to dismiss Marsha's comment. "That won't be necessary, thank you for that suggestion though. It looks like everyone we've invited has already replied. Except one person."

"And who's that?" Marsha asked, the pen that rested behind her ear was now in her hand along with a small notepad. She was a very diligent worker it seemed. "I can maybe get them on the phone by this afternoon if it'll help you at all."

"No," Louis shook his head, laughing to himself. "I know why this person hasn't responded. He probably won't respond at all actually."

"Who?" She asked, now overly curious as she walked further into the office. The pen was now capped and forgotten back in her hair, notepad closed. All attention was on Louis now. 

"Liam Payne," he answered. 

"The old footballer?" She scoffed. "Why did you invite someone who's irrelevant now?"

Louis sat up straight in his seat, a little taken aback at Marsha's brash comment. "He was- is- a friend of both Zayn's and mine and I want him at the record release party, okay?"

Marsha nodded her head, ashamed at her mini outburst. "I-I'm sorry. I overstepped my boundaries. I do apologize Mr. Tomlinson."

"It's fine," he waved her comment off with an eye roll and a flick of his wrist. "Just leave Liam's RSVP to me, yeah?"

*****

For Liam the allure of being home faded quicker than he expected. The first two, maybe three, days were great. Like Liam expected his mother waited on him hand and foot even though he refused more than once. His father took him around town and reintroduced him to everyone. He kept calling him a football star even when Liam knew that was no longer the case, he let his father have that moment though. His sisters stopped by on New Year's Eve to spend some quality family time together before they took off with their own plans. It was good to be home, sleep in his bed that he missed. Looking around his childhood bedroom, still decorated how he left it all those years ago. London just seemed so far away now, a lifetime ago. The memories were still fresh in his mind but Wolverhampton just felt right. For now at least. The job at his father's factory wasn't even that bad either. It took Liam's mind off of everything momentarily, for a good eight hours of the day at least. He didn't have time to be distracted by his old life while he worked. Some of his new coworkers sneakered and whispered behind his back, it was all expected. Everyone was going to have an opinion, as long as they kept it to themselves Liam didn't really mind. 

The foreman was easy on him because his father held such high esteem within in the company. Liam didn't want favors though, he earned this job just like everyone else. People were going to talk whether he wanted them to or not, he couldn't stop it. It was once the foreman left that things got looser, the radio was put on and work became stagnant. It was fine with Liam, he got to let loose and not be so serious. His father always kept a watchful eye on him though, making sure he didn't get too rowdy. The music was blaring through the speakers on his first Thursday there, Liam was nodding along to the old Usher song, singing along under his breath. Things went a little fuzzy after that, Zayn's voice was now everywhere. It felt like it consumed all of his senses, all he could hear, see, and taste was Zayn. That's the exact moment when the allure of home left Liam. He stood in the middle of the factory, ten minutes outside of Wolverhampton listening to Zayn's voice croon to him out of industrial speakers. This was his life. This was what he let his life become. He threw everything he knew in London away and ran home as soon as the going got tough. 

Getting home from work later that day didn't do anything to ease his mind either. He'd been home for only a week and he already was getting things sent to him in the post. Written in perfect cursive was his name and a return address from the heart of London. Liam felt like a child, afraid to open a piece of mail that was clearly marked for him. He took it up to his room and just started at it for what seemed like hours, wondering what it was. Iron Man that hung on his wall behind him kept giving him judgmental looks. With a sigh Liam finally decided to open it. It was a simple invitation, an invitation to Zayn's album release party. Obviously the return address was Louis's office. He was taken aback but the invitation initially, what was he supposed to do with it? He couldn't go, a part of him wanted to, though. From the tightening in his chest and the knot in the pit of his stomach Liam knew that Zayn still held something over him. He couldn't put a name to the feeling but he knew it meant something. After rereading the invitation another five or six times Liam placed it in his desk drawer, hoping to forget about it all together. Him and Zayn and whatever they were happened in another lifetime. He couldn't dwell on that anyone, he couldn't hold onto the past and move forward. 

"Baby boy."

Liam pushed himself way from his desk at his mum's voice and the knock at the door. "Yeah mum?"

Karen opened the door wide enough to walk through before closing it behind her and sitting at the foot of Liam's bed, facing her son who moved his chair to face her. "How you holding up?"

"I'm fine," he assured her, trying to sound convincing. "Just knackered from work is all."

"Babe," she cooed at him and squeezed his thigh. "You haven't really been yourself since you got home. I'm worried about you and so if your father. What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Liam replied quickly. He sighed at the look he received, his mother just staring at him and slowly nodding her head, not believing him one bit. "I miss my life in London."

"Okay."

"I was afraid to admit that," he told her sheepishly, dropping his head to his see his mother's hand still hadn't moved from his leg. "I didn't want you and dad to think I was ungrateful about my time here, spending the last week home has been amazing."

"I know, love," Karen gently spoke to him, her voice low enough that Liam had to scoot closer to properly hear her speak. "You haven't really been the same since you came back. So I'm going to ask again, is everything okay?

Liam let out a heavy sigh and shook his head. He thought he could do it, live as normal as a life possible back home. He just couldn't. "I had a good life back in London, you know? The kind of life you and dad always wanted me to have, football aside. I had friends, like real friends."

"Liam-"

"But I missed home too," he quickly interrupted her. "That's why I came back. A lot do things changed in such a short span of time that my head got a little fuzzy. I got cut from the squad then Zayn and I basically broke up and now I'm here, back home living with my mum and dad."

"Zayn?" Karen asked, her eyebrows raised in curiosity and a shy smile on her face. "That's the first time I've heard to mention anyone's name."

"Mum," he groaned, already regretting the can of worms he had opened. "Out of everything I just said that's what you're focusing on? Thanks."

Karen chuckled at her sons mini tantrum, removing her hand from his leg to pat his cheek gently. "All I've ever wanted for you and your sisters was absolute happiness. If London makes you happy, go. If this boy makes you happy, fix it."

"It's not that simple," Liam scoffed. "I have nothing waiting for me in London, no place to live, no job. And don't even get me started on the Zayn drama."

"Fix it," she repeated and annunciated every word with a firm poke to Liam's chest. "I didn't raise a quitter. Liam James Payne is better than that."

"I-I got invited to Zayn's album release party next week," he told her, moving around in chair to retrieve the invitation. "I'm supposed to RSVP by tomorrow but I don't know. I don't know if I wanna go."

"Go," she concluded and stood up. "I don't know the details of your relationship but hopefully one day I will. But for now though I'm telling you to go."

"I can't," he shook his head and looked up at his mother who was looking down at him, disappointed. "Fine, okay. I'll go but I have every right to change my mind within the next week."

"That's fair," Karen laughed with a shrug to her shoulders. "But you won't."

*****

Album release days always held so many different emotions for Zayn. He ran through the gamete of emotions within a twenty four hour period. When his first album was released it was like he was floating on cloud nine all day. He was busy, traveling all over England it seemed to promote it and get the word out. Radio station after radio station, tv appearance after tv appearance. He even did some satellite interviews in Europe and the United States. He was buzzing the entire day, Louis by his side the whole time. The night before release he spent at home, his mum cooking his favorite foods as the rest of his family tried to act like it wasn't a big deal. At the age of eighteen he was doing something he had only dreamed of. He had worked so hard to achieve the goal he finally achieved. Even after placing third on X Factor, he never gave up. Things stayed the same during his sophomore release, the day before was spent with family and the day of was dedicated to promotion. It had become routine by now, once again Louis was at his side. His partner in crime. 

This time it was different, this release would be different. It was his first one without Louis being just his friend and sometimes assistant, he was now Zayn's boss. He was the one in charge of everything Zayn needed to do today to keep his name and face out there. Even though they still weren't on the best of speaking terms Louis made sure Zayn's week was as stress free as possible. He spent his birthday back home with his parents and sisters, enjoying his twenty third birthday with family. He wanted just one more semblance of normalcy before being thrown about with work responsibilities. Every time he went back home Zayn wished he never left. He wouldn't trade the life he led now for anything else but missing his family always got to him. His sisters always changed drastically since he'd seen them last. His mum always worried about him when he was away and his dad just wanted his boy around the house more. Typical things. Saying goodbye never got easier, if it did Zayn assumed things would be wrong with him. Hiding his tears as he hugged everyone goodbye, promising to call them whenever he got a moment to breathe. 

The party thrown in his honor was just another thing he really didn't want to be a part of. The partying scene was never his, he enjoyed going out once in a while but all the attention was just too much. He rather celebrate the album release at home with his friends and family, call it an early night maybe. He poured his heart and soul into his music, it was an extension of himself. He left everything on the table, no stone unturned. You wanted to know about Zayn Malik? Listen to his music, dissect his lyrics to truly understand him. That's why he auditioned all those years ago, to have a positive outlet to express what he wanted to express, how he wanted to express it. Talking to the media at his party wasn't how he wanted to celebrate. Louis promised him that all the media were outlets that respected him and his vision. He made the rounds, shook a few hands, and quietly wished Louis was by his side to remind him who all these people were. He spotted Eleanor and Sophia by the bar talking to some record executives from his label. At least he had some friends by his side. 

"Zayner!"

Zayn rolled his eyes and shook his head once his name was yelled over the music. "Nialler, you already smashed babe?"

"Open bar," he replied with an honest laugh, his face red surely from the alcohol and the mass of bodies pressed together. "Happy album release day."

"Thanks," he replied and accepted the hug from Niall. "Where's curly?"

"Helping Lou unwind," Niall answered with an over exaggerated wink. "If you catch my drift, huh."

Zayn tried not to smile, pinching the bridge of his nose to calm himself. "Those two. Any opportunity they get, I swear."

"Oh like you and Payno aren't any better," he reminded Zayn, pointing an accusatory finger at him. "El's party, Lou's cheering up gathering, and my birthday. Slags I tell ya. All four of you."

Zayn froze because that's all he could do at Niall's words. Niall had used present tense when he spoke and deep down Zayn wanted to believe it was because of the alcohol he had already consumed. It wasn't though. He sounded so sure when he teased him, like it was common knowledge that he and Liam are-were-a thing. He didn't need people's constant reminder that what he once had was lost. He was reminded of it each time he saw his friends or heard or preformed his newest single. His single was one of the ones he had recorded while he was in Los Angeles with Liam. Their week away in the city was a highlight for Zayn, it helped them take a huge step forward in their twisted relationship. 

"Whoa, you killed your mood?" Eleanor's voice knocked Zayn out of his train of thought. She was giggling with Sophia by her side, her face still looked concerned though. "Love, you okay?"

"Did I ruin a good thing with Liam?" Zayn asked bluntly, almost knocking Niall over with his words. 

Eleanor's face dropped, now finally realizing what caused her friend so much anxiety and anguish. "No one knows, no one could ever know those things. And don't end up acting like Tommo did when he and Harold had their little hiatus, okay?"

"I'll be fine El," he assured her, a quick kiss to her forehead. "You enjoying yourself? How about you Sophe?"

"We're good Zayn, thanks," Sophia replied. "Congrats on the release by the way."

"Yeah, thanks," he responded, shrugging his shoulders half heartedly. "Who wants to help me find Haz and Tommo, ruin their night a little?"

"I'm always game," Eleanor laughed, linking her arm with Zayn's. "Lead the way, love."

Overall Zayn was impressed with the turn out of his release party. He still felt timid and out of his element but once he found Harry and Louis in the men's room he felt better. Ruining their moment elevated his mood rather quickly. After that he and Louis were back on better terms, even if their issue wasn't going to be resolved in a normal manner. That's just who they were. Zayn was lucky that by being busy he didn't have much time to focus on the absence of Liam. It just baffled him, six months ago he wouldn't have pictured his newest album release party to be filled with such a somber mood. It was a time to relax, unwind, and celebrate. He had worked hard, the hardest he had ever worked and now all he could think about was a boy back home in Wolverhampton. Around two in the morning the party died down and everyone went their separate ways. Staying with tradition Zayn went back to Louis's place. Louis would be getting the early tallies of albums sales the next morning and Zayn wanted to be with him when he got the news. Years before it was Louis who stayed with Zayn when he got the news the next day. 

The night together helped end their standoff. They got to talk, really talk. Nothing was left off the table, Zayn let Louis know how much his words the night of his birthday party hurt him. How a drunken comment ruin a chance at a real relationship. Apologizes aside Louis did express how sorry he really was. How a personal and professional goal got the better of his head. The idea to sign Liam as a client was something he never thought of short term, more preoccupied with the long term goals of it all. It wasn't easy for Louis to admit his faults, took a lot of guts and nerve. In the long run he had hurt his best friend and that was something be deeply regretted. Once the issues between them were squashed they spent a majority of the rest of the night watching mindless tv and reading fan reviews of the album. That's all the mattered to Zayn, critical acclaim was amazing and more than welcomed but what the fans thought mattered the most. A lot of them appreciated the mature sound and lyrics, could tell that Zayn wasn't the same kid they fell in love with almost six years earlier. Maybe the night wouldn't end so bad after all. 

*****

Liam felt stupid, more than stupid really. He just couldn't even think of a word right now. After close to a week of deciding, and his mums incessant meddling, he decide to head to London for Zayn's release party. He was a wreck that entire day, didn't even go to work he was that nervous. He mum made him stay home and tried to calm him down. Took him grocery shopping and shopping for an outfit, anything to take his mind off things. During lunch was when Liam told his mum all about Zayn, minus some details of course. How everything and nothing made sense when they were together. How on paper they shouldn't match, an out and proud music superstar and Liam who was open to just those he was close to. A now unemployed ex footballer, someone with nothing to fall back on except a shoddy factory job. He talked himself out of going to the party more than once during that lunch, kept running any and every possible outcome in his mind. Karen was a trooper through it all, letting Liam go through the motions. Feeling up and down within seconds of each other, basically having a conversation with himself most of the afternoon. 

That's what led Liam to London now, feeling stupid. He finally talked himself into going to the party, he was invited after all. After all his running around with his mother he got home and showered, even though he bought an outfit that afternoon Liam still took close to an hour to chose an outfit. He had no idea what he was supposed to wear, the invitation said party casual, whatever that meant. The drive was long and tedious, it was supposed to be a short three hour trip. Halfway through Liam had to pull over and calm himself down once again. His nerves were getting the better of him. It had been over two weeks since he'd seen any of his friends, if he could still call them that. Zayn aside, he missed Harry, Niall, and Louis, too. They had become a little band of misfits in the short time they spent together. Seeing Niall's face during every training session, a reassuring smile on his face every time Liam felt out of place. The comforting pat on the back from Harry during a match, how he knew that Liam was feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders. And Louis, despite how everything blew up, Louis was a stand up guy. A silent cheerleader in his relationship. 

It was obvious that he missed Zayn the most. Despite not having a label on their relationship he missed their relationship. How it was just normal between the two of them. Neither of them had to be anyone else but themselves around each other. Zayn wasn't a global musical superstar and Liam wasn't an upcoming footballer. They were just two lads who enjoyed each other's company. Despite the odds that were clearly stacked against them, they somehow made it all work for a little while. They made time for each other. Even after a grueling training session or match Zayn's flat was the first place Liam wanted to be. Wanted to cuddle with him on the couch, talk about their day, and watch mindless tv with the volume on low. Liam felt comfortable in his own skin around Zayn, maybe could've even loved him if things progressed. He would've been proud to introduce Zayn to his parents, let his mum gush over him, over them. That was all in the past now, things that would never happen. Another thing on the list of Liam's regrets. 

"Liam Payne, surprised to see you here again."

Liam smiled at the doorman standing inside the lobby of Zayn's flat. By the time he arrived in London the party was clearly over. Liam decided to try the next best location, Zayn's place. "Patrick, my man. It's good to be seen again actually."

"Bum deal you got with the squad," Patrick told him somberly. "Told Malik to pass on my condolences seeing I hadn't seen you since the news broke."

"Yea-yeah thanks," Liam tried to smile. "Zayn home? I kind of wanted to surprise him."

"Hasn't been home all day," he answered. "Busy day for the lad, his new album was released today."

"That's why I came here to surprise him," Liam tried to laugh. His palms were beginning to sweat and he could fee his heart beating a little faster, nerves getting the better of him again. "But seeing he's not here I'm screwed. Do you know where he might be?"

"No clue mate," Patrick told him. "Saw him leave this morning and that was it. I can tell him you stopped by of you like."

Liam rubbed his hand across his face harshly, feeling absolutely defeated. "No thanks. I'm going to head out then, good to see you again Paddy."

"Stay in touch Payne, your boy has been looking miserable without you," Patrick laughed lightly. "He talks about you and music with the same enthusiasm, you're a keeper I reckon."

Liam nodded his thanks and headed back out the complex door, feeling stupid once again. Of course Zayn wasn't home, he was busy today. Of course he wouldn't be home after a party, why would he go home? He had everyone throwing themselves at him, why not take someone up on their advances? It was too late at night for Liam to make the trip back home and he didn't have enough money to rent a room for the night. Where was he supposed to go at this time of night? It was close to two o'clock in the morning, who was even awake at this time?

"Liam?"

"He-hey Harry," Liam sighed into his phone. "Are you home?"

"Yea, Niall and I just got in. Why, what's wrong?" He asked in a rushed concern. Of course he was concerned, Liam hadn't spoken to him in over two weeks and now he was calling him in the middle of the night. 

"Nothing's wrong," he quickly assured him, kicking a small rock as he stood by his car in the quiet streets. "I'm actually in London right now with no place to stay for the night. Is it okay if I swung by and crashed on your couch for the night?"

"What? Of course Payno, you're always welcomed here," Harry told him, his voice bright and bubbly. "I'll even kick Niall out of his room so you can sleep on a proper bed if you like."

"That won't be necessary," he laughed and let out a sigh of relief. This was a huge step in rebuilding his friendships. "I'll be around in about ten, okay?"

"We'll be here," he replied. "Oh and Liam? Thanks for the call, it's good to hear your voice again, mate."

"You too Haz."

*****

Maybe Louis wasn't as smart as he originally thought. He invited Liam to the party and he never showed, not that he really expected him to. It was the thought that counted though, maybe. The day went off without a hitch anyway, which was good. Zayn did everything he was asked, radio, tv, and phone interviews. Despite everything that was or wasn't happening between them they remained professional. The party went off without a hitch, Louis spotted Zayn mingling with the right people, doing his best to look engaging. Even Eleanor looked like she was making a few connections at the party. When Harry arrived Louis was finally allowed to relax. All the running around he'd been doing lately was finally catching up to him. With Harry he was just allowed to be himself, have no worries. The biggest worry he had was where he stood with Harry, what their relationship meant. They had finally sorted it out, had an adult talk about it and everything. Louis was proud of himself if he was being honest with himself. 

They were both sick and tired of the back and forth, the games they were playing with each other. They're hadn't been anyone else in their lives for over a year, they weren't fooling anyone. Okay, so Louis admitting his love for Harry spooked both of them immensely but they were going to work past that. They were officially boyfriends which frightened Louis. He had never been anyone's boyfriend, not as an adult anyway. The last time he tried a real relationship was with Eleanor and everyone by now knew how that ended. It was good though, to now introduce Harry to people as his boyfriend. At the party people in the industry just excepted Harry at Louis's arm, they were a pair, a dynamic duo. It came as no surprise to Louis that when he tried to sneak away with Harry to the clubs bathroom that he'd be caught with his pants down, literally, by his friends. It wasn't the first time and sadly he knew it wouldn't be the last time that would happen. It helped mend his rocky relationship with Zayn. They just picked up where they left off. Working their issues out first. 

Zayn sitting in his sofa and having a thorough conversation was exactly what they needed. No business talk, nothing but the honest truth. Louis couldn't even count the number of times he apologized for ruining Zayn's chances with Liam. Now that he had his personal life sorted out he wanted the same for his best friend. He admitted that he was careless, only focused on the task at hand and never once caring about the bigger picture. It took a lot of courage for Zayn to forgive him, showed how much of a stand up guy he really was. It just felt good to have his partner in crime by his side again. The tv on low as they read through fan reviews of the album. It was late in the night mad neither of them were tired, still buzzing from the day. Zayn got up to have a cigarette on the balcony when his phone buzzed, a text from Harry. A text from Harry telling him that Liam was currently sleeping on his couch. Holy shit! Lousy tried not to go into a frenzy panic, but this was fate. Or something close to it. Now he just needed to get Zayn's to Harry and Niall's flat and hopefully those two crazy kids could work everything out. 

"Lou," Zayn groaned from across the room the next morning. Or was it afternoon? Zayn didn't fall asleep until close to five in the morning. "Stop moving."

"I'm not moving," Louis responded with a snort as he stood at the foot of the bed. He threw a shirt in Zayn's direction and smiled at his friends horrible catch. "Put some clothes on, Ni and Harold are cooking us a celebratory brunch."

Zayn tried to narrow his eyes at Louis, trying to convey his anger but his head was pounding. "I don't want to move from this bed."

"Too bad," Louis told him. "Besides you have a radio interview tomorrow so you'd have to move eventually."

"Worst manger ever," Zayn groaned and grabbed for the shirt that was thrown at him. "There better be pancakes at this brunch."

"There always is, princess," Louis laughed. 

So maybe Louis was an evil genius. After receiving the initial text from Harry the two of them tried to come up with a plan. Brunch seemed like the most normal of things, no one ever turned down the offer of free food. Especially if that free food was being cooked by both Niall and Harry, who in Louis's mind were just as good as his mum was in the kitchen. Getting Zayn up and willing to go was another issue that it seemed only Louis could resolve. Throwing clothes at him and demanding him to get up seemed to work just fine. Louis tried to hide his devilish grin as he drove to Harry's flat. Luckily Zayn was half asleep next to him, head resting against the glass. If he only knew what was in store for him. The smell of food hit them as soon as they were on the opposite side of the door. Louis felt a jittery feeling in the pit of his stomach, he was nervous. He was also mildly frightened for his life if he was being quite honest with himself. 

"When did you become polite and knock?" Zayn scoffed. 

"I'm being respectful," Louis huffed, rolling his eyes and breaking out into a smirk immediately. "I barged in unannounced few days ago and saw Niall stark naked, not one of my finest moments really."

Harry threw open the door and grinned widely, a dead giveaway. Louis still loved him anyway. "Welcome to casa de Narry. Food is on the table and Niall is mixing us up some mimosas."

"What's going on?" Zayn asked wearily, eyeing both Louis and Harry carefully as he walked into the home. "Everything okay between you two? You're not like engaged or pregnant?"

"Just walk!" Louis order, pointing towards the dining area. He pulled Harry towards him. "Liam still oblivious?"

Harry nodded. "That or he's a great actor."

"Let the fun begin."

*****

Zayn stopped short as soon as he walked into the dining room. He expected Niall to be the only one at the table, maybe even Eleanor and Sophia. Not Liam. Not a Liam who looked just as confused as he felt. Zayn looked around the room, trying to find that one bit that was out of order so he knew he was dreaming still. His throat immediately went dry and his head felt heavier than it was already feeling. Liam. Liam was sitting mere feet away from him, in Harry and Niall's dining room, slowly sipping a mimosa. 

"Zayn," Liam spoke first, shock written all over his face. His beautiful face. 

"Wha-what are you doing here?" Zayn finally found his voice to ask. 

"I got invited to your release party but by the time I got down here it was over," he explained with a laugh. Liam patted the empty chair next to him. "Sit."

Zayn looked around the room once more and realized that this was real, it was actually happening. He took the seat to Liam and shook his head. "You got invited?"

"Louis's doing I assume," Liam laughed. "I went to your place but Paddy told me you weren't home."

"You saw Paddy," Zayn sighed in disbelief, rubbing his palms into his eyes to hopefully wake himself up fully. Everything was just still feeling surreal. "And now you're here."

"I had nowhere else to go," he told him, Liam found a loose string on his shirt and began to play with it. Anything to detract from looking Zayn directly in the eyes. "They let me crash for the night and woke me up talking about a lads brunch."

"Louis told me it was celebratory," Zayn laughed. "They planned this." 

"Probably," Liam agreed. "Where are they? It's awfully quiet around here."

"Tommo!" Zayn shouted for his friend. "You and your boyfriend and the Irish one hiding in the kitchen, present yourself."

Moments later Louis walked in the room with Harry in tow, both their heads bowed in faux shame. Oh please. Niall emerged from the kitchen, a drink in his hand and a pancake hanging from his mouth. Real attractive. 

"Li-Liam!" Louis gasped. "What are you doing here in Harry and Niall's flat of all places. How shocking."

"Lou," Zayn said, shutting his friend up instantly. "Explain, please."

Louis grabbed a drink off the table and downed it in one gulp before taking the seat directly across from Zayn and Liam. "Haz text me last night and told me Liam was here. It was my idea to have this brunch. Get you two in the same room again seeing I'm partially the reason why you guys ended."

"And what about the party?" Zayn asked as he saw Harry and Niall sit next to Louis. "The invite?"

"A shot in the dark," he guessed with a shrug. "I needed to fix what I messed up. Look Malik, we've already discussed how sorry I am, this was my olive branch I guess."

"None of this is your fault," Liam told him, looking directly at Louis. "A lot of what happened was because of me. A lot of things happened at once and I just cracked."

"Don't need to be explaining anything to us, mate," Niall said. "We cleared the air last night. Zed's the one you need to explain everything to."

"Let's go lads," Harry said. "Let's give them some privacy."

"Privacy," Louis scoffed. "Nothing's ever sacred with us lot."

"Lou," Harry hissed as he stood up, grabbing Louis by his collar. "Let's go babe, Niall you too."

"Fine," Niall huffed and grabbed another pancake from the table. "I'm going. Where are we going?"

"Just go," Harry instructed them. "The flat is yours for as long as you need it. Just don't use my bedroom this time, okay?"

"Sorry," Liam replied sheepishly, a blush creeping up his neck. 

Zayn just stared at Liam, even after he heard gone front door close behind his friends. This was still just a lot to take in. Not even twelve hours ago he was ready to wash his hands of this whole thing with Liam, chalk it up to another lesson learned. Now it was all different, Liam sat next to him looking defeated and remorseful. "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry about," Liam assured him, his hand inching closer to Zayn's. "I'm the daft one, blowing this way out of proportion. You gotta understand that I had a lot going on and I couldn't deal with it all at once."

"Liam, you don't need to explain anything to me," Zayn assured him, hooking his pinkie around Liam's thumb. The simple touch made both men gasp. "I was so unclear about how much what we had meant to me and how Louis just royally fucked it up." 

"Don't blame Louis," Liam pleaded with him. "He and I will work whatever it is that we need to work out. This is about you and I."

Zayn snorted at Liam's words, the irony clearly not lost on him. "Do you want there to be an you and I?"

"Zayn," he groaned and lightly smacked Zayn's cheek. "Serious please."

"I am being serious," he told him and kissed Liam's palm, his hand still resting on his cheek. "From the moment I met you at Lou's place I knew I wanted to be with you. Don't give me that look, I'm being honest."

Liam narrowed his eyes, still disbelieving Zayn. "You did not, I was a bumbling idiot that night. Beyond star struck. I looked horrendous too."

"Liam," he sighed. "I think you're beautiful you donut. I want to be with you, you and all your idiosyncrasies, okay?"

"Someone swallow a dictionary this morning?" Liam laughed and dodged another light hearted smack from Zayn. "Okay, okay, sorry. So, you want to try this out? Willing to be with someone who helps builds plane parts all day?"

"If that someone is you, then yes," Zayn answered, he removed his hand from Liam's cheeks and rested his forehead against his. "We can make this work, right?"

"Right," Liam agreed. "You gonna kiss me or something rock star?"

As he chuckled Zayn leaned forwards and captured Liam's lips with his own. It was as if his life got sucked out of him, he was feeling so many emotions at once. Firstly, he was so glad he was able to kiss Liam again. He was afraid he was never going to feel that again. Liam's tongue ran along his bottom lip and he gladly opened for him. Just by kissing him Zayn knew that he could eventually love Liam. He just had that quality that Zayn could see himself falling for. A whimper embarrassingly escaped his mouth as Liam bit his bottom lip. He clutched onto Liam's shirt, trying to push him closer. 

"Leeyum," Zayn whined in need when they pulled away. "God, I've missed this."

"Me too," Liam agreed and cocked his head a little to the right. "Wanna try out Niall's room?"

Zayn had to hold onto the dining table as he laughed at Liam's comment. Yep, things were going to be just fine with them, with all of them. "Why not."


End file.
